Who better to call out a workplace bully than someone who writes about the world's bullies?
I finally found some time to write about this uniquely bad experience.
It started with a subtle mind game the saccharine employee -- and resident gossip -- began playing with me at the start of the year, the objective of which wasn't lost on me, or anyone who possesses an ounce of emotional intelligence. As she took my order each day for 8 months, the charming-but-inauthentic Neve would pretend to have forgotten my name as she looked up at me doe-eyed, and ask, "I'm so sorry, what's your name again?"
"Anna," I'd reply. Not my real name, it's just quick.
Seeing as how I consistently reacted with stoicism, as you do with attention seekers, Neve then tried to amp up her attempt to insult the customer in less subtle ways, and with skillful duplicity -- this is vital to maintain a facade.
She would groan dramatically and grimace when I was next in line, snicker and shake her head as she studied my face as I ordered, walk by my table and look me up and down as she stifled her laughter, or hover over me as I sat like I wasn't there. If I was at the condiment bar in the back, I'd turn to find Needy Gonzales suddenly standing right beside me.
In July, I had stirred my drink only to find phlegm floating amongst the ice cubes. I stood in my kitchen in disbelief, and thought, "Why would Daud spit in my drink? He smiled when he handed it to me."
(Daud, one of the supervisors/baristas, who also happens to be Neve's boyfriend -- a fact revealed to me by another employee later in Oct). I threw the drink out.
August : About to type in my name, she caught herself, studied my face, and then fluttering her lashes, sweetly asked for my name. I asked the barista who the supervisor was (it was him), and decided the issue could wait. Maybe he'd asked the others if something was wrong, because the next time I came in and ordered my usual iced chai (the best iced chai there is) Neve quickly said, "You're Anna, right?" And then proceeded to giggle.
I found this hilarious as well, as she had walked into a trap all on her own.
I spoke with a supervisor soon after, which infuriated her. She tried to have a stare-down with me on my next visit, and was promptly ignored. So she refused to take my order and walked away (as witnessed by the supervisor), and I stood there for a few minutes along with other customers until another employee arrived.
On 8/16 I emailed one of the owners.
I began with, "I would rather not write a review on Yelp or Google as I only have a complaint regarding a specific employee" and ended, "I'm not looking to get her fired, but I thought her conduct needed to be acknowledged."
But Neve won't be criticized. When called out by another regular for wiping down my table with cloth that'd been on the floor, she ignored him, quickly walked away, and wiped down other tables.
September : I see Neve whispering in Daud's ear as I walk by -- not an unusual sight, only this time he was staring right at me. He started to watch my every move when I came in, as she made a big show of twitching her mouth as though experiencing an uncontrollable spasm of the lower face while she suppressed her laughter.
Oct 6 : While I waited for my drink, I heard her ask Daud what I'd ordered (why?). He told her, and she reached into the ice machine to fill a plastic cup. Thinking she was helping him with drinks, I started to object. Later, I apologized to Daud for misunderstanding, and he continued to berate me for picking on his girlfriend.
I attempted to explain to him what had been going on. He responded to everything I said with a flippant and condescending, "Nope. That never happened. She didn't do anything wrong. You're the bully." I asked him what he was talking about. He angrily asked, "Did you curse at her while she took your order?"
If I was insulted by anything she'd pulled at this point, it was the fact that a bratty twenty-something year old who's mastered the art of manipulation couldn't think of a more convincing lie to feed her supervisor boyfriend to get him to clean up her mess, twist things around and play the victim -- an excellent strategy to get what we want in life. Unless you're a person with integrity, then this would be beneath you.
Two shady employees who come into the workplace with entitlement and complacency, tamper with beverages, and slanders a customer who wanted nothing to do with them -- I'm weirdly flattered at being singled out. It's pathetic to have to keep making complaints as a customer dragged into this bizarre experience, though.
After speaking with a member of the neighborhood council and some lawyer friends, a complaint will be made with the Department of Public Health due to a raging narcissist that no one can keep in check, and who has no respect for boundaries or cleanliness in the workplace. I stopped coming here between 7am-3pm since then, but have decided to stop altogether. read more