I hate to review national chains, but I'm making an exception for Jimmy John's so I can post the following true conversation:
So without further ado, I give you "The Time Jimmy John's Sandwiches Kept Me Out Of Jail"
It's shortly after 2am and I'm making my way down Hickory St. with my delicious beach club (turkey, sprouts, tomato, avocado, onions and hot peppers on french bread. . .no mayo) and my roommates are enjoying their sandwiches as we head home to do the inevitable (shoot fireworks, play video games and drink 40s of Steel Reserve) when all of a sudden the familiar red and blue flashing lights dot the street.
Two cops get out of their cars and I immediately survey my roommates' conditions and depressingly realize I'm going to have to do the talking.
Me: Evening sir.
Cop 1: Can I see your ID? (I hand him my ID and he collects from everyone else. . .we are all of age. . .advantage ME)
Cop 2: Hello son, awfully late for you boys to be walking around out here don't you think?
Me: Absolutely, but we drove to the bar and since we just live a couple more blocks down the road we figured we'd be better off walking home instead of driving.
Cop 2: Well, that's a good point, but why are you walking down one of the most trafficked roads when there are plenty of others.
Me: Well to be honest it was out of fear, sir.
Cop 2: Excuse me?
Me: Well we tried cutting through campus but security was being a dick so we just figured we'd take this road. . .plus I didn't want to get attacked. . .sexually.
Cop 2: What did you just say?!
Me: Well I did a sex offender search and the highest concentration of sex offenders in Denton is currently the stretch of apartments between campus and Bonnie Brae. I know I look young and if they've been drinking they might think I look younger. I don't like those odds.
Cop 2: Are you kidding me? Are you some kind of wise ass?! (Cop 2 is definitely pissed. . .I realize jail time is almost a certainty)
Me: No sir! I am 100% serious, I just wanted to eat my sandwich and walk home in peace!
Cop 2: Jimmy John's?
Me: Yes sir, beach club, but no mayo. I hate mayo (I figured this might be relevant information if I go to the tank and I'm getting served lunch the next day)
Cop 2: I hear ya, and to be honest that's probably the best food you can put in your system right now. You like the roast beef they have?
Me: It's OK, that's his favorite (point to roommate grinning like an idiot)
Cop 2: OK son, where do you live again?
Me: Just right over there (point to complex).
Cop 2: Alright, if your IDs check out you boys are free to finish your walk and your sandwiches, but be careful.
Cop 1: They're good (hands back IDs)
Cop 2: You boys be safe.
So maybe it was mostly dumb luck, but I'll still credit Jimmy John's for keeping me out of jail that night. For that, the Denton location will always get 5 stars in my book. read more