Huffin' About Nothin'!
My son is currently looking to find the best burger in Michigan, according to his tastes. So when we heard that the Huffington Post listed a Michigan burger the number one 'Sandwich You Should Definitely Try Before You Die'; you know what we were planning to try next. Thankfully it was right in our town so we did not need to travel at all.
With any review that I personally do, I always try to find something nice to say and yet remain truthful, so let's start at that. The most honest thing I can say about Kitchen 67's 'Bird in the Hand' is that it was not terrible tasting. That's all. That is the nicest thing I can say about it.
Now, having said that, where do I start? How about with the complete idiot that wrote the attempt of an article that started this whole hoax. The more of the sandwich that I ate the more I thought that the person that wrote about it might have never even tasted the sandwich and just read reviews and tried to sound as if he had actually eaten in the restaurant or his taste-buds are dead, and no one has bothered to tell him. I'm going to guess that he has never even set foot in Michigan, let alone stepped through the doors of Kitchen 67 in his life! After reading the first three paragraphs of his attempt at journalism or being a food critic, he could not even have smelled the sandwich that he claims is "Fresh tender beer braised chicken, hand breaded using housemade Founder's Red Rye beer batter, heavy mayo, crispy lettuce ribbons, served on a caramelized buttery brioche bun branded with a '67' on the top." It's your number one pick and you only wrote one sentence sentence about it?!!! Please ....
Yes, it is 'fresh' and 'tender', but the mayo is not 'heavy' nor does it bring any flavor to the sandwich at all. A chicken sandwich on the Dollar Menu of a McDonald drive-thru has more flavor than this sandwich. The fries that come with the 'Bird in the Hand' have more flavor than the sandwich itself. The 'Bird in the Hand' does not 'challenge your palate', unless the 'challenge' is to try to find a flavor to it. The 'Bird in the Hand' is not 'simple with a twist'; it is just so simple as to be the most bland thing I've ever eaten. The menu itself has more flavor than this sandwich! Water might have more flavor than this culinary canary! Two birds in the bush (that you have not eaten) are worth more than this 'Bird in the Hand'! For $7.99 you can eat a multitude of things that have more flavor than this piece of meat between two pieces of flavorless bread, mayo, and lettuce. I have no idea why this is even on the menu.
Both my son and I have eaten at this restaurant before. The staff is delightful, everything else on the menu we have tried has been wonderful and well made and full of flavor, but eating the chicken that crossed the road, got ran over and blind-sided by the semi-truck being driven by Carey L. Poole and was lying out in the hot sun for days flat, has more flavor than this sandwich. If you were planning on making a trip to Kitchen 67, try anything else on the menu, or even the paper that the specials are on, then eating this bland sandwich that doesn't fly at all and falls flat on the platter that it is served on. Avoid it like you would any common piece of roadkill that you do not want to dirty your car with. The author that chose this should be forced to eat it everyday for a year so he can discover the subtleties to be found in a Saltine Cracker!
Thank you Mr. Brann, but I do not need to change my rating, even though most of my review was a critique of the one sandwich and not the rest of your establishment, and I'm not looking for free 'stuff' nor do I wish any favors. To reiterate; the sandwich is flat and has little, if no, flavor. The rest of our experiences at Kitchen 67 have been delightful and the stars given reflect that. The article about the sandwich was totally misleading and is not the fault of you, or your wonderful staff, and I think most adults can realize that. I just do not give out four or more stars unless I'm highly impressed with everything about an establishment and would encourage others to look past this one sandwich and try everything else on the menu. Just please do not eat the menu; it might not be 'gluten-free' ... read more