I am Jack's provoked malevolence.
Scorned. That pretty much sums up how I feel about Protein Bar.
I walked into an empty Protein Bar, void of any customers beside myself. There was one employee (who I believe was the manager) sitting off in this little side/segregated area and two employees, one of which appeared to be just getting off his shift, up front by the condiment station chatting it up. I grabbed a menu, looked it over for a few minutes and went over to the counter area with no less than 5 registers, all un-manned. I waited, waited some more, I even did a few stand-in-the-same-spot-but-kind-of-tap-dance actions so the two chatting employees who could plainly see me, would acknowledge presence. Eventually the employee deep in convo realized I wasn't going to serve myself, took a minor break from her discussion and yelled over in my direction that someone would be with me. I said 'okay', then watched as she yelled over to another employee who was just milling in the kitchen area, maybe 8 feet from register, to ask yet another employee to come up front and take my order. It seemed like a lot of bureaucracy to go through for one customer to order, but whatever. I'm no protein bar-rista, and I'm not there to tell anyone how to do their job.
A girl walked out from the back of the kitchen, chewing something and wiped her hands on her pants as if she'd been interrupted from eating. This girl was the friendliest employee I encountered at PB, and actually very thorough once at the register- even upsold me on a side of veggie chili to go with my Vegan Original Grilled Bar-Rito. My total for a 16oz 'Beetbox' juice, a vegan grilled bar-rito and the side of chili came out to $18- not enough to sh*t your pants over, but enough to make me really f*cking pissy when the manager came over to scold me for what I'd like to refer to as, 'some bull-ass-sh*t'.
You see, as I was waiting for my food-pager to go off, signalling that my order was ready, I decided I was going to snap a few pics of their menu so I could remember what the f*ck I ordered when I went to review. I look up from taking a pic of their soup options and I see the manager girl hovering over me. She asks (in one of those really annoying heightened-pitch voices that customer service people do) if she can help me with anything. I said 'no' and mentioned that I'd already ordered as I picked up the pager thing to show her that I did in fact order something and that I wasn't homeless and just squatting in their empty restaurant. She followed up with a bitchy warning that I can't take photos inside their business. At first I thought she was joking and I kind of made a weird Rick Moranis goofy half smile, but then when she said it again I could only respond 'really?' and then let out a single laugh in the most involuntarily condescending way I've ever felt myself laugh. I put my phone down and she gave me a paper menu and said that if I wanted a take-home menu I could have that, but she couldn't allow me to take photos there.
I am Jack's raging hormones.
She walked away, my pager went off and in my head I knew I was just going to wait till her back was turned and take even more pics than I ever would have in the first place.
The veggie chili, I can't lie, was pretty fantastic. Spicy. Hearty. Everything I like in a veggie chili was there. The $7 juice I got wasn't worth it- bottom-line. It supposedly had beets and cucumbers and all that good jazz, but it tasted like nothing more than really watery, purple carrot juice. My bar-rito was fine. If I had to describe it, I'd say it tasted healthy and then probably pause and make a face to go along with the statement so people knew I meant it in a negative way.
Back to the photo thing: I realize that 'no photos' may be store policy, but I didn't see a sign stating that anywhere and since I was their only customer and there really isn't anything unique or ground-breaking going on at Protein Bar, I don't see the need for the secrecy. Inside looks EXACTLY like a Naf Naf Grill, only Naf Naf has employees working their registers and it wouldn't cost me $18 for a healthy meal.
Personally, I think the manager's effort would be better spent getting her employees to stop chatting and start noticing customers, than coming over to yell at their only customer like I'm some child for taking a pics.
I might have been generous and rounded to 4-stars when really they'd actually been about a 3.5, but after the scolding and lack of service, all I really want to do is slap a raging 2-star on this bad boy. I've settled on a pretty diplomatic rating of 3-stars, and while I won't be back to Protein Bar, I encourage you to go. Try it for yourself and see if you like it better than places like Naf Naf or Jason's Deli where you can get the same health conscious meal for less money and with better flavor.
All pics uploaded, btw. Enjoy.
I am Jack's smirking resentment. read more