Ha!
Right at the start, instead of chips and salsa, Los Arcos gives little round deep fried and then baked tortillas (both corn & flour) that are so crispy they snap - plus a yummy dip. Amazing. But....
Ha, Ha!
Also - Yummy Crab Ceviche. And Fish Ceviche ------ but....
Ha, Ha, Ha!
Oh my God! This will be a hard review to write. Because I want to give it five stars or more for some dishes. And I want to give it one star or less for other dishes. But it is not the food that makes the experience here so memorable: it is the staff. But even more - it is the entire event.
"Tee Hee Hee - HA HA HA!!!!
The best thing I can say about this place is that my daughter and I are still laughing about it. We have so many little fun stories from the experience that it could be the basis of an entire stand up comedy act.
First off - they had a huge room with a live band that was full of energy - and they sat us in an adjacent room, in an empty section, with three television screens showing a soccer game. Of course I said "no" and asked for a table in the music room - which they sat us in right away. What was that all about?
Even though there were many intimate two person tables in the lively music room, they sat my daughter and I at a table for six, which was weird, and felt bizarrely empty. But I realized later they did this because it put us at a table that was being covered by a waiter who needed to practice his English. And it was clear that he was not really learning English, but instead, simply learning how to say a handful of English phrases really really well, with nearly no accent. But he attacked each syllable like he was siegeing a castle. He was so loud and aggressive that we jumped every time he asked us a question. And then when we answered, he had no idea what to do.
This exchange was repeated over and over. And each time, as soon as the language became an issue, our waiter called over another staff member that knew a few words of English, and our answer was repeated. But two people were not enough, so a third and then a fourth was called - then the managers came - then more managers. The highest number that we counted near the end of our confusing meal was nine. Nine men in uniform, hovering over us, trying to understand what were we saying - all befuddled. And what we were saying was simple - like "no, not the fish with peppers and onions, we want the one with garlic and clams". It was so funny. One guy even moved in so close that when my daughter leaned back on her chair to move away, she crushed another guys hand and he screamed and ran into the kitchen clutching his wound.
They were so freaked out by us that when we ordered the "Moulton Lava Cake" with a variety of fresh fruits and a scoop of ice cream, they ran to the kitchen and got it immediately, forgetting to cook it, so the cake was raw, and they left the fruit off. When I showed our pitiful plate to the top manager and told him that it looked nothing like the picture he replied "the picture - of course it is nothing like the picture!"
The best dish was the "Fish Lola" (which we got because Lola is my daughter's name). It was fish with bacon and cheese. Of course, you could not taste the fish, and the entire thing was ill conceived because it was just bacon flavor and two white mushy things under it that you could not taste. The worst dish was the Shrimp in Mango Sauce, which was yummy perfectly cooked fat shrimp, absolutely ruined by what was nothing more that Gerber's mango baby food puree. No spice - just lukewarm orange colored baby food on shrimp. We laughed and laughed. When we called the waiter over - bam - it was one guy, then two, then three, then four, and so on.
We just laughed more.
I will never come here again - but not because they don't have some delicious dishes that are great (we had a couple of really excellent dishes like the seafood soup), but because - if we come again, it might not be as funny - and boy - we really want to remember how funny this dinner was. read more