I love this pizza place. I love their 'za, I LOVE their ranch, and I love their side salads (radicchio FTW!!). Portland is NOT known for pizza, despite having a ton of pizza places everywhich were. I was (and remain) a HUGE fan of East Glisan Pizza Lounge - it did a lot to class up my then-extremely-shabby-chic 'hood; Ranch Pizza on Stark signals that the "classing up" process is now complete: Montavilla is now bookended by two - count em, two - excellent semi-new pizza spots (AND of course, complemented by the OG, the one, the only Flying Pie, which I have only ever eaten while attending the two-for-one Tuesdays at the Academy, which I ALSO highly recommend to anyone who digs 'za and great film).
BUT I DIGRESS. This is a review about Ranch Pizza, which for ONE is a great name for a pizza shop and for TWO is GREAT PIZZA (and great ranch, which is ESSENTIAL). I love it so much.
First, a note on style: It is NOT the same as Chicago deep dish, as some woefully uninformed people would have you believe. It is DETROIT style, which is far superior, better balanced, and more delicious. Chicago pizza is cheese soup. Detroit pizza is perfection. If you're looking for something for your brain to imagine, think of a really good focaccia with pizza toppings, that is somehow much more than the sum of its parts.
Anywhoozle. If you're being a snob about ranch dressing, knock it off. Ranch dressing is an American ICON and your snobbery is NOT welcome here. (An easy test to see if your snobbery is well-founded or not: Do you pride yourself on being an adventurous eater, but turn your nose up at certain things you think are associated with the lower class? Well then you're not an adventurous eater, are you? I once tried salted fried peanuts dumped into a coca-cola because I had never heard of that before. I don't care about the provenance of a snack; I let my tastebuds decide. And you should too! Taste is, after all, a matter of taste.)
Anyway, enough grandstanding: back to ranch. I first learned about the glory of dipping pizza in ranch dressing at the humble Wild River Pizza in the down-and-dirty town of Cave Junction, Oregon. I, too, had my reservations: Ranch? On pizza? Seems strange! But I am an open-minded cat and gave it a try. Whaddaya know, A STAR WAS BORN. Now I verify before ordering in or dining out on pizza whether or not quality ranch will be available and calibrate my expectations accordingly. ALL PIZZA IS IMPROVED BY THE ADDITION OF RANCH. I repeat, ALL PIZZA IS IMPROVED BY THE ADDITION OF RANCH.
And Ranch Pizza has THE BEST RANCH. Even if I'm ordering a humble half, I ALWAYS get the extra giant tub of ranch on the side. Then I have extra ranch at home in my fridge for various ranch-related purposes: Spicing up my rabbit snacks? Check. Dressing the world's best kale salad? Check. Chugging in front of an open fridge in the dark in a stained bathrobe while a concerned bystander gapes in horror? Not check, but hey, it could happen. I wouldn't put it past me. The ranch is that good. (But if you're not on the verge of a ranch-related psychotic break like me: You can skip the extra tub and be safe in the knowledge that your pizza order will come with a generous portion of ranch on the side - each order comes with PLENTY, unlike almost every single other pizza place in the entire universe, where even if you order extra ranch on the side you'll still run out of ranch long before you run out of pie).
I've only ever ordered the Ranch Pizza Classic: Sausage, mozz, ricotta, spicy chilis, n basil. Why mess with a classic? It's so good it needs absolutely nothing added and nothing removed. Also: Get the radicchio side salad. It's really good and makes a great counterweight to all that carbs-n-cheese-n-ranch you're about to consume. read more