I was so excited about my first visit to the Float Shoppe! I had enjoyed floating in the past. I booked a float and a massage as an early birthday present to myself.
I left with a few gifts I didn't like in the form of bruises on both arms primarily around my elbows. It's three days later and I'm still very tender in several spots.
The injuries are a result of the float. Sadly this float experience was not great because of the particular tank I had, the Floatarium. I can imagine if I had one of the other tanks I would have been a lot more satisfied and less bruised after my float. The massage was pretty awesome so I have to give them at least three stars. I was the very first Float Shoppe customer the new LMT Kyle worked on. He was excellent and I sure hope he was able to pocket the entire $20 tip I left as no one else there deserved a penny of a tip as they should have discouraged me to do a float in the Floatarium tank, or at the very least taught me how to open and shut the lid without injury.
This is the description of the tank from the website:
"The Floatarium float tank offers a particularly spacious float and is often a favorite among experienced float tank enthusiasts. The lid opens manually and there is not an option for light on the inside. As soon as you close the door, the float tank is entirely dark."
This is what it really should say:
"The Floatarium float tank is not for inexperienced floaters and is only a favorite among experienced, very strong, float tank enthusiasts. It offers a spacious float. The lid requires that the floater have a lot of upper body strength to open manually. The hydraulic hinges do not activate until the lid has been pushed upwards almost the entire way, several feet above you, you will have to stand while holding the door and try not to slip and fall. The hinges also do not help when lowering the lid so be very careful as the lid will slam down on you the last few feet."
So this is what I experienced: Lovely greeting by the staff who offered water or tea plus paperwork to complete, and then briefly talked about the float experience. Another staff person took me upstairs to the float room. She showed me the shower, a table that had earplugs, a wash cloth, a spray bottle with clean water and a head float. I asked if there were any tricks for using the tank and she mentioned that when she had floated in this particular tank she noticed the lid did close quickly once it was a few inches away from being completely closed. That was it.
She left, I stripped and showered and easily stepped into the tank being careful not to slip as the epsom salts make the tank super slippery. I lowered myself into the tank only to realize that I could not reach the handle on the lid unless I was standing, so up I went. It was a bit awkward to settle down while pulling the lid shut and I was really startled when the lid slammed closed. Taking a few extra deep breaths I did my best to relax - it took a bit of extra effort to finally feel relaxed due to the lid shutting so swiftly.
About halfway through my float I wanted to spritz my face with the clean water, As you can imagine, I was a bit disturbed to learn I was practically trapped. Why? Well my body was like a limp overcooked noodle but I needed strength to open the lid. Plus there is no way to get any traction so I had to wedge myself sideways and press my body into an uncomfortable position to gain any sort of traction in order to get the lid to open even a few inches. At this point the hydraulic hinges should have begun to help, but that was not the case. I had to pause, straining against the lid, just to keep it open a few inches because it wanted to slam shut again.
After getting the lid to stay open - the only positions are all of the way open or all of the way shut - I spritzed my face and settled back down, this time I did not close the lid. I continued my float but it really was quite disappointing as now any exposed skin was chilled and even with earplugs I could hear people in the building and a few random sounds from outside.
When the music began to play I was relieved, I stepped out of the tank and into the shower, washed off, toweled dry, put on the robe they provided and opened the door to my room. I had a feeling I was supposed to go back down to the waiting area until my massage but I didn't feel comfortable doing that, the waiting room isn't the kind of place you want to hang out in after floating when you have a massage coming next. I noticed the massage room and knew the LMT was a man named Kyle. Sure enough I noticed him in the hallway and asked If I could go directly into the massage room, he welcomed me to go directly in without going back downstairs. The rest of my experience was truly 5 stars.
If I ever go back it will be for a massage with Kyle, otherwise I will go back to the place on the other side of the river where I enjoyed a much better, safer, and bruise free float experience read more