Holy Fistbump, Batman, we aren't in LA anymore.
It's Friday night. My first weekend out of LA in a long long time. So when my cousin (the local who is taking my sister, her girlfriend and I out on the town) asks us what we want to do after our bar crawl, the lil sis and I decide dancing is the way to go.
We were concerned that my sisters paramour wouldn't make the cut as she is only 20, but the friendly bouncer assured us it was 18 and over and only 5 bucks. After the not-so-friendly boucer took our money, we walked into our first offical dance club in Ohio.
Holy Shit.
Lemme just put this out there....I am no stranger to hipsters. PBR, skinny jeans and tattoos are not deal breakers to me in anyway. I have shopped at American Apparel, I listen to indie rock, hell I even have had scene hair.
However, I have never before seen what my eyes beheld this night.
Hipster Douchebag hybrids.
It's kinda like the girls from Jersey Shore had babies with (insert hipster band name here). And, I know it sounds like I'm talking shit....but it was ironically beautiful.
As we shuffled our way to the dance floor, my sister (who is, in fact a big old lesbian hipster) turned to me in glee and shouted "Oh my GOD! They're FIST PUMPING!!!"
That's right kids. I wanted to hate it. I wanted to pretend like I was appalled. But it was totally giggle inspiring. Fuck yeah. Columbus Shore up in this bitch.
And it got so much better. While we were dancing to electronic breaks and beats, I glanced up to the stage and noticed something else that let me know I was a stranger in a strange land...There were 3 DJs. And I don't mean over the course of the night either. Three. At. The. Same. Time.
And the best part about them were that, unlike all the djs I've seen in LA (and I've seen my share) these guys weren't just jockying the discs, they were performing.
One was flashing signs...I didn't know Ohio guys flashed "westsiiiiide" but hey, I'm open to new things.
Another was so into himself I thought he was gonna start rubbing his own nipples.
And the third one couldn't stop himself from stopping, turning to a friend and discussing what I'm sure was a deep discussion on Brechtian theater, before fist pumping some and getting back to his turntable.
People, it was a perfect storm of awesomeness.
If it wasn't for one of the less hipster-more douchey guys in the crowd starting not one, not two, but three fights which resulted in my sister getting clipped in the face and almost kicking his ass after pushing him across the floor one handed, with out even one security guard batting an eyelash, we'd have danced there all night, and continued to have a fucking blast.
I sincerely hope and pray that i get to come back to this place if only for the Alice in Wonderland like quality of seeing this acid trip of a crowd again. read more