The size of this meal is stupid. Its the size of a kid's meal at McDonald's, except twice the price. read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - This is an adult meal! This is ridiculous, its the size of a kids meal at McDonald's. - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

The waitress had no personality, not friendly. The chicken strips were overcooked and dry, husband and fish and it was rubbery. The new manager came over and talked to me and I'll give this place another try. read more

It's a bar I would ride in and stop here I am sure a lot of bikes do. I think the place is a dive kinda dumpy and I like that. The food is standard bar food, I didn't have anything stellar. The staff was great but the cook wasn't very organized. If you are looking for what I would consider to be standard biker fare this is the place. read more

Went with a group of friends for lunch. Started with drinks, and the Bloody Marys were excellent. Ordered lunch and waited well over an hour. It came out in separate blocks. They tried to bring us two meals that weren't ours, and mine never came. The manager asked the kitchen for it, and instead of making a Philly cheese steak, he made a French dip and, upon realizing he screwsd up, added a pinch of onions and peppers. My daughter's chicken strips were dry and chewy. My son ordered a pizza, and it came out undercooked. The manager removed the charges from our bill, but I have no desire to return. I would only recommend going there for drinks and skipping the food. read more

The locals was friendly. I noticed a lot of people was playing pool. . Did not order food. Quick stop off highway. It's a large bar. Lots of room. They had a chef on duty. read more

Great chicken. We brought a minor for lunch and Dude went and made us feel welcome. Thanks.

Had the house cheeseburger and was one of the best I've had in a while! Flavorful and juicy and came with fries for $12! Highly recommend coming here for a good, inexpensive burger. Service was great as well! read more

I went out today to get a beer and burger. The bartender was stuck putting in multiple orders. No other help. The owner asked my what I wanted. I said, a "Shock Top." She looked puzzled? I said at the very end of the bar twice. The bartender said, she's the owner and doesn't know what beer is on tap. We don't need your attitude, and don't have to serve you! What owner doesn't know their business? They were all busy, so I went to sit down to gamble. I was going to go back up and order and pay. A lady walked up to me to tell me that the owner has cancer, and they are all trying to be nice to her. Then, the owner walked up to me and said, "do you have a tab?" I said no, "what do I owe you?" She, grabbed my beer and said, "you are excused!" I have survived prostate cancer! Cancer has devastated my family! I don't need or deserve your attitude! The old "Dump" can go out of business as far as I am concerned!! If you are open on Christmas? Have enough staff! The lack of education in our workforce is astonishing! I had an incident of crappy service at another business in Albany this holiday weekend. read more

This place is horrible I hear from old timers in this town how great the broasted chicken is.... it is bad. Go to KFC and you will be way happier. Anything you get from this dirty place is better anywhere. Chicken wings frozen and then fried. Bathrooms are disgusting. Staff is also not happy to see you. Keep rolling past this place and go anywhere else. It is gross and will probably make you sick if you eat here. Stay far away. read more

Terrible service and a lot of incompetence. Was hung up on after a long phone wait, and then told that many people were calling in. If this is the case, they should bump up our order because we had called in first and were hung up on. Was told our takeout order would be ready in 30 minutes, and it ended up being 50 minutes. And when we got there and paid, they ended up missing an entire order so we had to wait another 25 minutes for them to make it. Nobody has time to waste like this. I will not be coming back here. read more

While Humptys offers all the usual drink selections and lotto games there something else that makes this spot special. There's a full size kitchen too. Not not behind the bar not behind a closed door but right there in the open and it's awesome. I had the two piece chicken dinner I substituted the potatoes for coleslaw and let me tell you and I wanted was a chicken some of the best I've ever had but the coleslaw (which I am a connoisseur of) was really really good as well. Brandy and Elijah were awesome and made me feel like I've been a regular there for years! So get yourself down there and get you some good grub great drinks and hang out with some awesome people too ! read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - Two piece Fried Chicken dinner. - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

A complete shithole with poor management and the owner don't care. Also kitchen is absolutely disgusting and the employees don't wash there hands like ever read more

Terrible service the new staff has no decorum or customer service skills. The blonde with face piercings is incredibly rude,very slow and doesn't know how to talk to people. Used to love the place but if she's working nights I'm not coming back. Didn't eat any food but the chef seemed like he was cooking read more

The service was not good at all. one lady waiting on all customers inside and outside. Overwhelmed!! We had to get up and go to bar to get drinks and later to order food. Then our food was sitting on the shelf, so had to ask about who was goin to bring to table. Duh!! It hasn't been good for some time and it's sad as been coming there for over 50 years. ;o) read more

Yep it's a dive bar!! But in fact a pretty alright dive bar with lots of food choices. And even more beer and cider choices. The staff was super awesome took good care of us all night. The mushrooms where amazing and the burgers are great and the chicken is good as well. So if you don't have to be all fancy pants bar person then this place might fit the bill. So don't be afraid to hit humptys and get some grub and drinks read more

Some coworkers wanted to gather for a farewell party but we had a few underage invitees. This bar was supposed to be minor friendly until 9pm. When we approached and asked the general rules of the bar for minors, the bartender met us with a generally unpleasant demeanor including rolling her eyes when I asked about her about playing pool. Heads up - "Minors are only allowed to sit on the back wall." So i don't recommend inviting any of your 20 year old friends here, or any gathering here in general if you like to be respected by your bartender‍ read more

I'm not sure why I keep giving this dump another chance. The female that tends bar during the day and is apparently the "boss" (as she so proudly screams at other employees ) is one of the rudest people I've ever encountered. A friend and I went there for lunch. l. As we sat there waiting to be greeted, she rudely asked, " Do you want something?" I said "yes a couple of menus so we can order food. " She replied, " You'll need to come over here to order." Over here, meaning we needed to come to her because she was apparently busy having a conversation with a person sitting at the bar. She needs a lesson in common courtesy and customer service. We were finally able to place our order. Not only did the lady in the kitchen cook our food, but she delivered it to our table with a smile. Again, the "boss" was apparently too busy with her conversation! The only saving grace of this place is the young man that cooks on steak night and the lady that cooks in the mornings and afternoons! read more

Slow service in an empty bar. Burnt patty melt with half meat and cold fries. Bartender horrible....

This place is great! Awesome service, chill atmosphere and good food! Come for happy hour and enjoy the drinks too! read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - Enjoying a couple of drinks with some food ordered. Awesome atmosphere and service! - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

Not worth the hype. Shit service, mediocre food at best. Used to be great before Shirley got a hold of it. Staff only takes care of their friends read more

Fantastic dive. People are super friendly, drinks are cheap, pretty much everything you need

Humpty's dump bar and grill. 3/5 Albany, or Bar Burger ordered: humpty cheeseburger (1/3lb burger, 2 slices of cheese, lettuce, onion, mayo) With fries Cost: $7.75 Burger: the burger was good. way to much onion for the amount of burger, It was like practically all onion, When I took the onion off the burger was pretty good. Fries: the fries were good, I love crinkle fries :) Service: for there being only one waitress, and it being a little busy, she tried to come by. Food came out somewhat fast. Overall: I was not impressed. The food was average, the service was hit and miss. Wish I could say better things, cause I had a lot of people wanting me to try this place. read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

Never thought I would have found myself here. It was a nice warm night so off we all went on our ride night so we ended up here. We had a lot of Hareley's in our group. Probably 22-24. They were very friendly here. I didn't eat any of the food, but some of our friends did and from what I did see and hear they all liked what they had. Some had broasted chicken, patty melts, burgers, and tots. All of the locals were very friendly. read more

Went here the other day and was VERY impressed! I met Ed (the cook) at another spot and he said I should check it out, I'm glad I did! HUGE portions of really good food! Like, seriously good! Both bartenders and the guy who was doing the karaoke were really friendly. (I missed their names though, sorry!) Beware, if you don't look "country" the locals WILL stare at you as if they don't live close enough to Portland that a nose ring shouldn't be that impressive to stare at (lol) but no one bothered us anyway. LOTS of space inside and a smoking patio! A GEM! read more

They are back open. Went in at 9am the other day and has a good cheap breakfast. The on duty bar tender said not too many people know they are mow open at 7 or 7:30 "I forget which one?" I'm glad to put it out there though as I love this place. The outside expanded patio area is comfy with plenty of heaters, fire pits and a few adult sized fun games. You can now sit inside, but as many I have grown accustomed to the outside area. I think drink prices have increased a little, but understandable with covid. Overall, thank you for being a community staple Humptys! read more

I used to love coming here but since they have sold to new owners they just aren't the same. On Sundays there are 3 people running the whole place. Everyone is waiting so long to get their orders placed, waiting for drinks, and then finally getting their mediocre food. makes me sad, but I hope they can get it together and be the great dive bar they used to be read more

We have stopped at Humpty's numerous times going South and to Beaver games. We stopped on Thursday to have breakfast and the bloody Mary's were great however breakfast was cold and horrible. Chicken broaster was also broken so could not order lunch to go. Bathroom was unclean and feet stuck to floor. I will stop again but hopefully they clean up their act soon! read more

The wings are good, burgers are good, service is terrible. They forgot the bacon for my wife's burger and the bartender let the food sit til it was cold while she tried to do the math for someone's bills instead of taking care of the rapidly cooling food. The only reason it's not 1 Star is the food wasn't bad. read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - menu - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

'Points Off for Cleanliness' Before the review, is anyone else DEVASTATED & PO'D that we the lost the 'BEST ALL-TIME EVER' - 'PACKED HOUSE' - 'PEOPLE CAME FROM EVERYWHERE' - BROASTED CHICKEN DINNER AND JOJO'S?????? The food now is only adequate, but it used to have such a "WOW" factor!!!! Last couple of visits here have prompted a comment about food establishment cleanliness; especially during this time of the plague. The salt and pepper shakers were so 'sticky' I could hardly get them out of my fingers to set them back down. Use packets, provide sani-wipes; better still, do an expected basic decent job of cleanliness for the sake of your customers. From the owner/manager on; got to step up your game - the whole place is an Oregon Health Inspector's full-time project - the shakers are only the tip and indication of many issues. With the length and rate of plague infections increasing; your operation jeopardizes the exemplary effort others are making in your own industry - why contribute to another food industry shutdown. read more

I want to give this place a 5 but I can't because the karaoke girl on Wednesday is just this worst person I have ever met. not only does she constantly sing herself but she will let her favorite people sing 3 songs before you can even have 1. she is rude and I will never go back on a karaoke night. Laurie is a top notch bartender with great service. please get a new KJ or lose business read more

After 15 yrs of eating at Humptys, I can no longer reccomend Humptys . New owner has run it into the ground with poor quality food at higher prices and weakened drinks. Visa machine and ATM machines are frequently non functional forcing a cash only environment. Rather than listening to very long term clientele the new owner does not care about what works in this community. Many patrons have stopped going there and quality help has left. read more

Wait staff was friendly. Chicken was good but just slightly over brown. It was cooked through but temperature needed to calibrated as to not over cook the outside. Service was slow but since there was only the bartender to service the whole bar it was understandable. I would recommend trying it out. We will be back to see if we can give it a better review - it was average but nothing extraordinary. read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

Never again... seriously. I knew it was a dive bar and I'm usually down with a good dive bar, but damn. There is no way I'll ever feel the need to give them another shot. read more

Went into place yesterday bartender Andy was the worst. Verbally abusive to me and tried to come from behind bar to confront me thankfully other bartender stopped him. Talk to owner-who blew me off and hung up on me. Good thing my friend taped it all. Stay away unless you want to be assaulted. Next stop APD! read more

Very disappointed in Humpty's. We've been going to Humpty's for years and have always enjoyed the service, food, and drinks. The drinks are now water down, food is just so so. Not worth money and will not go back anytime soon. Hopefully managment will change read more

By the way the rest of the menu is prepared very nicely. This established in 1965. Ask for Ted he is the head cook, give him a tip as well if you can even a $1.00 means a lot. read more

I almost don't want to write this review because I feel like Humpty's is a fun little secret and I have to be careful who I tell! But, good stuff deserves credit so Humpty's is no exception. Growing up in the area, I passed Humpty's off I-5 many, many, times and it eventually turned into a joke between my dad and I. We'd see it, and sarcastically say, "Oh yeah! Let's go hang at the DUMP! Sounds like a GREAT place!" Well, a couple years ago it was my dad's birthday and we wanted to go get a drink. I jokingly said, "let's go to the dump" and dad was into it, so we gave it a shot. On the outside, yes, it looks horrific. The inside, based on appearances, isn't much better. But let me tell you what, DO NOT judge a book by its cover here! Excellent service! The people who work there are attentive and polite. I went there on my birthday and the bartender bought me a drink. It's just that kind of place. INCREDIBLE fried (okay, broasted) chicken! No joke, the only fried chicken I've had that rivals this place is Screen Door in Portland. Their chicken is FANTASTIC. Everything else on the menu is usual bar food fare, and it's done well, but you are doing yourself a disservice if you order anything except the chicken. The prices are unbelievable. I believe it's $7.50 for a two-piece chicken basket that comes with homemade jo-jos (also to die for) and garlic toast. Yes, please! I can hardly ever finish mine. I've never left hungry. This is not a fancy place and you won't find expert mixologists and signature cocktails. However, the classics are done well here in that well drinks cost $3.50 and come in pint glasses. Don't ask questions. Also, $1 jello shots. Let your inner-trash come out and let yourself enjoy a cheap-ass jello shot! Please don't discount Humpty's on its appearance. This place is really a gem and they deserve your business. read more

Stopped in for dinner after a movie. Place wasn't crowded and pleasantly quiet--as in no screaming loud music. We sat down and were treated to the most attentive service ever. Got drinks right away and ordered our food. There were four of us, and when the food came it was just right and everyone got exactly what we ordered. The food was all good. My son says they have the best clam chowder in Albany, and probably for a long ways around (available on Friday night). The chicken was awesome, the burger wonderful, and the steak plate was way better than we expected for the price. The service was attentive and quick, the atmosphere great (it is a dive bar, after all) and I intend to be back next time I'm in the area. read more

Great experience! The lady who served us was amazing! Definitely recommend the chicken fried steak!

Stopped into this place on Monday and it's a little regulars bar. They are pretty friendly here and the atmosphere is small town. I'm pretty sure they knew we weren't from the area- they were polite all the same. I wanted to stop in because of the name. Had to have that in my check ins! I guess I haven't done a review for awhile, but this is a great place with really strong drinks. I had to take awhile on mine. Also, since it's winter, the lights went out, that was cool. I would stop back through. Didn't eat so cannot comment on that, but food looked decent. read more

Humpty's Dump Bar and Grill - Bars Near Me - Albany, Oregon

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