Background
I rarely write reviews, and when I do it has always been for positive reasons. Until recently, I would have never expected that Hops on Birch--a go-to establishment for me since it opened--would be the first negative one. Hops has an almost sterling reputation with Flagstaff locals, so these words probably won't even make a dent in their reputation. That's fine. I will never go back.
After a long Tuesday at work, two days before our wedding anniversary, my wife and I decided to head downtown. We often go to Hops to unwind and then grab dinner afterwards. Almost always, we bring our dog.
The Event
Everything was fine for more than an hour. I had two or three beers. My wife was on her second, which I had just ordered from a different bartender whose shift started around maybe six. Following a quick trip to the restroom, I stood maybe two feet in front of the bar while another patron finished his order.
When she looked up at me and asked if she could help with anything, I told her I'd like another 928 and then wanted to close out the tab.
For no clear reason, she replied, "I'm not comfortable serving you."
Dumbfounded, I asked her why. One word. The patron next to me tried to lean in and stop me asking. Paraphrasing our interaction: "Never seen this conversation go well."
The bartender spun the pay pad around and told me I had to leave, basically spitting venom that I was making a disturbance and she could get a manager to force the issue. Again, I asked why while signing, saying I had done nothing but sit there drinking and talking to my wife. I didn't tip, mostly out of shock. Also a first.
After not receiving an answer, I asked her to get her manager who happened to be the same bartender we started the afternoon / evening with. All I received was platitudes that, "This is how it works. It's at the bartender's discretion."
Okay. I promised to submit reviews and let anyone I know what occurred. I've lived here 17 years and have no plans to leave. Maybe petty, but here we are.
I did not swear at or in any way demean or show rudeness to this person or anyone else at Hops. I never have. Also, I think it goes without saying that with my wife less than ten steps away, I made no pass, spouted no innuendo, and--mostly because I'm introverted--did not even talk to or smile at this person.
The Analysis
I still have no idea why we were eighty-sixed. My wife and I were talking together at the end of a long table the entire evening. Perhaps loudly at times, but not without class or minding the other patrons. The dog only made a fuss when other dogs showed up or one of us went to the restroom.
The bar had maybe six people maximum the entire time we were there. What disturbance? Who was disturbed?
I've traveled a good chunk of the world and seen all kinds. I'm half Asian and my wife is from the country that half originates. We're both working professionals who keep to ourselves.
I don't like to assume racism, and I've seen the real thing. It's stupid.
I'm not sure if this was racially motivated. I want to give this bartender the benefit of the doubt, but I have few other reasons to draw on as to why she--seemingly arbitrarily--chose me to take her frustrations out on.
What I do know is that it was humiliating. As a man of pretty well over thirty, I've forgotten what it feels like to be frustrated to the point of tearful rage. This is some childhood BS I thought was well past. My wife had no idea what was happening until we were out of the bar. She's also very upset. Because we're upset, the dog is also.
The End
At this point, I want no apology or explanation. I expect I'm more likely to receive the same platitudes I did previously, and that's on the most positive end of the spectrum of possible outcomes.
But I won't be silent either. Few people may ever read this, but I sincerely hope that those who do find a different establishment to patronize.
In all of this, I've realized that the arbitrary and hurtful whims of a single person can still cause humiliation. And in that humiliation, I also realize I am not willing to let it be.
I ask everyone who sees this to avoid Hops on Birch. There are many other and, now seemingly, better options in Flag. read more