I have alot to learn, about being the parent of a teenager/tweenager. The world is a much different…read moreplace, than when I was a kid. I used to come home from school, throw my bookbag on the floor and go outside, wherever I felt like, until it got dark, or until Diffrent Strokes was on. There was never a thought, about my parents worrying, although Im sure they did. I found myself in numerous scrapes, but at the end of the day, I always found my way home.
Times have changed. My own kids are watched over like veal. I tail them like a bad spy, whenever they venture out. There were no problems in our old neighborhood. There werent many kids so mine were happy to stay home. Since weve moved to Folsom, its Kid central. Every other house is full of kids. Theres always a new face coming through our door, and my kids have the need to explore. We've been reluctantly letting them out, in the neighborhood, and I felt pretty good about it.
Until now. One friday evening, this past fall, I was in charge of the offspring for the night. A couple of girls invited my 12 yr old daughter to a nearby skating rink, something that they said they do every Friday. I wasnt sure about it, but had to mke the decision on my own. Saying no would only add strength to a future rebellion, but I was scared to say yes. This is usually the job of mom. I decided to be cool dad, and let her go.
I had no idea the questions I should have asked. I figured if they do this every friday, it must be OK. I just asked when they would be back and said that if it was later than 10pm, they needed to call. My daughter doesnt have a cell phone yet, but one of the girls did. I guess it would have been a good idea to get that number.
So I spent an uneasy night, waiting for 10pm and their return. 10pm, rolled around, then 10:15, then 10:30. I was beside myself. Finally, the phone rang.
" Hi Daddy!"
" Uh, Hi- why arent you home yet?
" We are waiting for you to come pick us up."
What! This would have been good info to know BEFORE they left! They said they go every friday, and Ive never been part of the equation before...why now?! Apparently, the other girls parents could only drop them off, now they were at work. I tried not to let my head explode. I dont mind making a deal to pick them up, its how my parents did things back in the day, I just would have liked to know that beforehand.
" Where are you?!"
" I dont know...a rollerskating rink.'
That narrowed it down. I was able to find it on the internet, along with directions. It was 30min away. Luckily, my wife was home ( with her accusing stare) and she was able to stay with my son, while I set out to pick these kids up.
Finding it in the dark, was much harder than it seemed on Google maps. At least now I had the friends cell number to try and zoom in on them. At this point, I thought of a valid question to ask.
" Girls, is the rink still open?"
" No, it closed a half hour ago, we are in the parking lot...its dark"
!!!!! So not only were the girls alone in a dark parkinglot, but I was going to have to find an unlit building in an unfamiliar area. When making another call, to find out what this place is near, I got some more good news.
" Uh Daddy, the police are here"
This just kept on getting better. Were they in trouble? Was I in trouble? The good news was that it was easy to find, now, with the police car and all.
When I pulled into the lot, the girls looked like there was no problem at all ( maybe this happens every Friday night as advertised.). I was greeted by a female officer, Colleen Joyce. She laughed at my frazzled dad act (it wasnt an act) She had seen the girls alone in the lot, and decided to stay with them until a parent arrived. These are the little things, that PO's do that we forget about. I appreciate what she did. Even though she was "only doing her job" , it was good instincts to see the girls and make them (and me) comfortable.
Once they were safe in the car, I tried not to get too angry, but they knew i was mad. I was cautious to put them fully on blast, because I want them to call me if there is a problem and I dont want them to feel like they cant.I was probably just as mad at myself, for my own mistakes, but at least I learned. I learned she wont be going out again, for at least a few years.
