I mean it's Taco Bell so expectations are pretty much nonexistent to begin with AND YET this particular location somehow consistently manages to disappoint.
Let me paint you a picture:
If you try to go any time after the sun sets, the inside will probably be closed despite what their hours say and you'll have to go through the drive thru (maybe it just turns into a super exclusive club after dark, idk I've never been able to get in and neither will you). Anyways, if you're lucky, someone might take your order at the drive thru although more often than not you'll just sit there for 3 hours repeating "hello" into the speaker like a confused imbecile until finally driving off without any food or dignity. I like to think that the employees pop champagne as you leave and laugh at the fact that we all have a relatively short time on this earth and they tricked you into wasting hours of it in their drive thru waiting for food that was never going to come in the first place (but that's just me).
Should the stars align and someone actually responds over the speaker to your desperate cries for the glorified dog food they serve, DO NOT under any circumstances ask them any questions or assume that you can just order whatever it is that you came there to order (this is not Burger King, you can not have it your way). You will have whatever cold leftovers they could not sell that day and you will like it. Now that I think about it, maybe just mentally prepare yourself by watching the "Soup Nazi" episode of Seinfeld and just act accordingly (except there will be no delicious soup in your future. There likely will not be any food in your future.)
In the event that the person taking your order is either new or has recently sustained a head injury and actually let's you choose whatever it is that you wanted for dinner that night and then takes your money (let's say you ordered a chicken quesadilla and a beef taco) do not be surprised if you get back to your house, eagerly open your bag of Taco Bell, and find nothing but half of a KFC biscuit, a stale tortilla, and an empty packet of mustard. After all, beggars can't be choosers. It's Taco Bell's world and we're just living In it. But, let's say that you had a particularly tough day at work and the only thing keeping you going was the thought of sweet sweet Taco Bell before bed, so you put on your big girl panties and decide "Yanno what? I'm gonna go back and have them correct my order". Well too damn bad, they're closed. lol. Try again tomorrow between the hours of 6:18AM and 6:27AM. And I know, I KNOW, you're probably thinking, "but why would I do that? They're only open from 8:00AM to 11:00PM" and my response to you would be "They're not open from 8:00AM to 11:00PM either you fool! Your life is a lie. Nothing matters! So you might as well just say yolo and head on over".
Anyways, in summation, the devil works hard, but the Stephens City Taco Bell works harder.
If it's always been your dream to die a slow, painful death under the warm purple glow of the florescent Taco Bell logo, then this is the place for you. If you just want some f***ing $1 tacos, drive 10 mins down the road to the Taco Bell in Winchester (which is excellent, I might add). read more
