THE COLLECTORS
Once upon a time there were a couple of "collectors" who thought it was really fun to go to yard sales, antique shops, grandma's basement, and other such places that clearly held treasures and other incomparable, sentimental memorabilia. They also thought they needed to hang on to furniture, inherited, that was way too good to donate. This couple, Dee and Dubyew, never even considered the fact that (eventually) all that good stuff would not fit inside their humble abode, try as they may, until one day they realized that without some quick action, the house would become a war zone...and that stuff was clearly already winning.
Dee and Dubyew, such good hearted people, had every honest intention of downsizing, but their brains apparently had an electrical short. So, getting a storage unit was considered a viable, temporary solution....just until the "kids" moved out and took much of the saved stuff with them to furnish their own humble abodes, or Dubyew sold it on EBay or a yard sale. It didn't matter that most of the stuff they had saved had a value less than a deflated soccer ball, or the kids didn't really like or want it. The collection grew.
Six years passed and one day, a letter came in the mail. Get your stuff out, it said. We are selling the property, knocking it down, and you will be happy to know we no longer will be extorting you for your money.
It was then that something in Dubyew snapped. We may have to resort to another storage unit, but *all* that stuff is not coming with us, said she. Dee trembled and knew that his empty beer can collection, the gorilla fur rug, and the eight appliance-sized boxes filled with ketchup and soy sauce packets needed to go. Grandma's hookah pipe and rubberband ball the size of a moose head were also a no-go. So, Goodwill said thank you, the 1970's vintage school books and ugly furniture were finally gone, and Waste Management had to hire temporary workers due to an unexpected surge in dumpsters filling up.
After successfully whittling their collection down to at least half, it was time to find new storage. And that is where Yelp became their hero. There were many local storage places, but all even more expensive that the previous one, and with shockingly less square footage. All but one. Yes, Storage Stop. Mind you, there was a waiting list. There was also a really hip manager, Melody, who willingly worked with them, so well that she had just the right unit available within one day. The prices...unbeatable, the unit...clean, the security...satisfactory, the management...a precious jewel.
Happy ending? Well maybe not quite yet. The D's still need to purge more collections, but they are in a far better place than before, literally and figuratively and economically. BTW- is anyone interested in some slightly used dental floss macrame curtains? JK.
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