After first calling to confirm the Quirk's rooftop terrace was open, my husband and I spent the over $300 required per night and made the voyage to Richmond from Washington DC. I made clear to the person answering the phone that our sole point for choosing the Quirk over our customary Omni was to experience the well lauded rooftop.
Upon checking in later the same day, we were told the rooftop was closed due to a wedding. A wedding that was presumably scheduled far in advance and should have been made known to me when I called to confirm its availability earlier in the day. Moreover, the hotel itself was littered with wedding guests and we waited fifteen minutes for an elevator to take us to our guest room. Unacceptable on all counts.
The evening concierges were very apologetic, and comped dinner for my husband and I at the Quirk's restaurant. My mother's meal was not comped, likely as she hadn't also booked a prepaid room at the Quirk (wise sage, she is). The concierges told us the food was prepared by "the best chef on the East coast." Having dined at Michelin star restaurants in Paris and otherwhere in Europe, as well as several James Beard winning restaurants on the East coast, we chuckled at the remark, in good humor. While we did not expect dinner at the Quirk to rank amongst one of the best meals we'd ever had, we also did not expect the food to be as terrible as it was.
My mother and husband both had the duck. I watched, curious, as three dishes appeared in the prep window (visible from the dining room which is also the lobby ***insert awkward dinner punctuated by onlookers and worn travelers lugging suitcases to and fro and wedding guests laughing loudly and drunkenly***). A chef spent ten minutes (timed via my iPhone) laboriously applying garnishes to two plates with his bare hands. I hoped against hope those were not our plates, knowing they were as soon as they were picked up by our server. My mother's face dropped at the same time my husband's twisted with stifled laughter as their duck dinners were placed in front of them. My mother is a huge fan of duck, and has dined on duck at numerous establishments. She is a fan of good quality and tasty duck, not restaurants that "try too hard," over embellish and the food isn't good. The duck was decorated with enough perfect dots of sauce to make a diner experience vertigo. The tiny pieces of duck on the plate weren't flavorful. My entree of lamb involved some pate-tasting lamb sausage that was wrapped in sickly looking eggplant. It wasn't good enough to take home to the dog. All our entrees were left uneaten.
I should've mentioned the appetizers. My husband had the strawberry salad, which he enjoyed. I had the mushroom and cheese fondue which was grainy and after three bites (one per person) was sent back. My mother said the filling of her dumplings was over cooked and the wrap wasn't good. The complimentary honey butter that was served with bread, however, was delicious and frankly the highlight of our stay. We ended up going to Rappahanock immediately for a do-over.
Our hotel room was not at all quirky in a positive way. The room was small, the floors uneven, and there were rather large, dark scuff marks high on the wall. The mattress did not extend to meet the wooden frame and I hurt myself exiting the bed (see photos).
We awoke the next morning at 6am to monstrously bright beams of sunlight. The blackout curtains did not fit the window. I say again, the CURTAINS do not cover the WINDOWS. Awake and irritated, my husband pulled on the curtain cords, rearranged the curtains around the sole upholstered chair in the room- all to no avail. He rung the front desk to share the curtains did not cover the windows and we were unable to sleep.
The young woman who answered the phone seems neither surprised nor concerned and extended our checkout by an hour and a half.
I headed to the mini fridge to pacify myself with a frosty cranberry juice. The mini fridge wasn't turned on. "Here's a problem I can fix," I thought to myself, as I turned the machine round and turned on the switch. I was greeted by the loud mechanical grinding as the poor machine attempted to singlehandedly redeem the crappy hotel accommodations. Disgusted and finally given up on improving the situation, I turned the machine off and settled in to endure the remaining few hours of morning before I could politely call family to come retrieve me from my overpriced hell.
This hotel is shameful, not worth the price, and I will not again be a patron. The Quirk may be a nice gathering place for a beverage but please, do not dine here and do not attempt to sleep here (unless you enjoy being woken up at sunrise due to ineffective curtains and injure yourself while exiting the bed), all for the bargain price of $300/night. read more