Ohhhhh where are my manners. Welcome to O Mandarin of the hamlet known as Hartsdale. You may acknowledge this hamlet as the direct creator of the first Carvel. Your lady may know the area for it's shopping centers. But let's reverse the story and talk about how those in the area know O Mandarin as the go-to Chinese location within town.
On a sweaty yet chilly night on the mountain I wear out my days atop, I did feel the necessity for some grease lightning in my veins. Those who know, know that 2025 was the year of self-recognition for many; Finally realizing the Chinese man/woman that lives inside us all. But yes... that lava-like frozen night on the top of the peak of which I typically reside upon... I, a newly found Chinese man, began to ponder. In the forenoon, I performed an advanced tai chi sequence of which burned an excess of calories. I mixed in a bit of Yang, Chen and Wu. My internal energy crescendoed, and I stored up this potential energy for a later time. The time had come. I began to mull over options, utilizing that stored and compact energico. I - in traditional fashion, placed my milky and subtly manly yet intricate hands behind my back, lifted my shirt just enough to showcase half my belly button as well as the entirety of a happy trail which was cornered by the remnant peaks and valleys of tapered obliques. It was one of those winters. Dirty bulk. Needed to add muscle to a frame that some begged to question: "Is there really even more muscle in this word to add?" Others, such as my grandmother, would tell you differently. But what does she know. I shan't worry about the summer cut that I will (and have) inevitably side-stepped. I live in the moment. And in that moment, on that toasty yet frigid night along the coast of the pinnacle of which I'm placed, I knew I needed something to clog my already choking arteries.
- My cookie numbers in the month of December bypassed a century mid-way through the calendar. I was handling temporary diabetes well. The acute symptoms of a piss per hour, shortness of breath, and new fat corroding my core didn't stray me away from the course. On this journey, I had many a greasy nights. It's perfect for winter. Cuddled up with my own fat, I lay back in a coated serenity... pale and pudgy... delighted but weary of the general joy I find within what should be a desolate sadness. The Joker may pair well with the Queen, but doesn't the Joker really need to be the Queen's Ace of Spades? Possibly a King? A balance difficult to strike. But if we don't strive for perfection, then how do we end up with more Linguini's? -
Anyways... nearly flailing from heart attacks, I stared out the window across the trees into my neighbor's living room 1000 yards away. I seeked... sook... sought inspiration for my night's meal. I began to rage and show signs of a true outburst. The energy from my Tai Chi postures was spilling over. My eternal happiness was being intercepted by despair. Hey tubby - Why don't you eat what's in the fridge? Hey box boy, why don't you drop and give me 50? Hey loner, why don't you go do calisthenics at the park? Hey kid, why don't ya grow up? Good thing I was too distracted by my chiseled face in the glare of my neighbors window 1000 yards in the distance. You so handsome. You need soup. Of course. I should've known. The only inspiration I needed was from myself. Eureka, I refused to yell for I am no chum and surely not a bum. But Eureka I surely experienced. I lifted my chin in congratulatory fashion to myself, tilted my eyes into the sky. The first drop of flurry. It was time. Chinese time.
When it's delivery time in Westchester, there are only a few places to even truly order from. The lack of good Chinese in this area is disparaging more than it's disappointing. If you are above or at the border of a certain town and up - There are no questions. O Mandarin provides the answers. Solid soup. Nice dumplings. Good Fried Rice. Decent noods. Good General Tsos. Some additional good and unique players. Quality protein. You don't feel gross from the ingredients, you just feel gross from the sheer quantity that you destroy. The way it should be. Nothing's really kicked my shins, nor has anything blown my socks off but they definitely do a solid job of keeping you coming back the next time. I've also picked up a few times to survey the entrance of where I'm placing my trust upon, lovely ambiance in their restaurant. I'll have to actually eat-in once. You can't make me, but I can make myself. If you're willing to eat in, then it must be solid.
You can do much worse, but I don't really think you can do much better for takeout in most of Westchester. A worthy four stars. We are in the middle of the year of the fire horse. Don't tame him. Ride the fire this winter. Stock your stockings and stock your stomach. My weatherman says Chinese winter begins on November 1st - So you'll find me chomping down on some of the O Mdin' beginning then. Bai Bai, Baby - LB. read more