When a fairly large man starts yelling into the phone "STOP TALKING STOP TALKING STOP TALKING" do the people in his presence think this is rationale behavior for a business owner? Do they think the person on the other end of the phone deserves that or do they think that business owner has anger management issues? I wonder what they think when they realize it's a woman in the other end who is not actually talking very much....So here's the whole story.
Several weeks ago I approached Hurts So Good Tattoos to use their space for my band's video shoot. The owner was kind at first and said to work with his event coordinator. In that first meeting and over the next few days I laid exactly what we wanted to do and they both oked it without any suggestions that I might need to do anything to prepare the space. The idea was that we would be throwing a party in their backyard while the band got tattoos and then we would party with our friends. Simple, right? Yesterday morning, just a few hours before the event, I got a text saying their lawn person hadn't showed and the grass was kneehigh with stickers everywhere - absolutely unusable. The event coordinator tells me "I might be able to get one of the apprentices to do it but either way we will get it figured out." I think it's handled. 2 hours before the event, my DJ shows up to begin setting up and it hasn't been done and the event non-coordinator is apparently too busy to discuss it. People were about to start showing up and we had no place to set up. So my friend, who I hired to be the DJ for the night and I would like looking fresh not like he's just come off a 12 hour shift in the sun, decides to mow for these guys, who then act like we're inconveniencing them by doing what they told me hours before that they would do. Reasonably, I was upset that weeks of planning resulted in zero planning on their end. Considering I was about to bring a lot of people in their shop to get tattooed, I was very confused by this attitude. I was about to bring them a lot of money, they weren't discounting anything even with the massive amount of people I was bringing. I told the "event coordinator" that I felt the band tattooes should be discounted and my DJ was not volunteering to mow their yard because I was paying him that night so I guess expected something in return. Instead of trying to fix his mistake, he canceled the event by text and wouldn't answer the phone when I tried to call. It was 1 hour before the event was supposed to start and because of this I hadn't finished getting dressed. I'm freaking out at this point and the owner of the Hurts So Good calls me. I thought at first he was trying to work thing out, you know smooth it over like owners do, but no. Instead he acted like I was being unreasonable. He actually told me that when I hired the DJ who does events there, that I should have known they don't do lawn care that I was supposed to do it myself. But the DJ is not their employee. I was confused and said, "But you told me to go through your event coordinator who never told me any of that."
He yelled "I don't appreciate your attitude. We don't mow. I gave you the space it's on you to clean it.."
Once again I tried to say that his "event coordinator" told me that they do, that they hadn't shown up and that an apprentice could do it. If someone had just told me that we needed to do it before the day of the event, it could have been done. Instead this man starts yelling at me that he doesn't appreciate my attitude and that I need to stop yelling.
I said "I'm not yelling, I'm trying to fix this" (Richard was here to verify, I swear I wasn't yelling y'all). This BUSINESS OWNER then starts yelling at me "STOP TALKING STOP TALKING STOP TALKING" He yelled again that I had an attitude and lots of other things I don't remember at the moment. Friends who had begun arriving already at the shop and heard him said he was cursing a lot at me but I was in such shock by then that I don't remember that part. What I remember clearly though is that he lost it on me when I tried to say "but no one told me this." I was really confused at first since I wasn't yelling but then it occurred to me that having his own mistakes told to him by a woman pissed him off so much that he couldn't control his anger. The other thing I thought was that maybe he was doing this so other people around him would think I was yelling and being the person he claimed I was so he could say that's why the event was canceled. I'm a professional and expect other businesses to act professionally. I did think it was odd that there was no calendar to schedule events and no written agreement as I would do for my business but figured they just like things a little more casual. I know better now. I don't recommend women go to this shop. I feel like if I were a man booking this event, none of this would have happened to me.
Luckily my friends came through and we filmed a killer video at our house. read more