I want to share a recent experience I had on Thursday, October 22nd, at Flipside Thrift in Rohnert…read morePark. I've been a customer there for a long time, and the staff has always been friendly, but an incident occurred that has unfortunately made me decide never to return.
While standing at the checkout counter about to purchase around 10 items, a gentleman nearby asked the clerk about the discount colors. I asked the clerk to confirm that it was Senior Discount Day to make sure I received my discount. The clerk then realized he might qualify as well and asked for his age. When he said he was 60, I kindly let him know, "Hey, you get a 50% discount!"
Instead of accepting that friendly gesture, he took my kindness as an invitation to drop his single item on the counter ahead of mine. Had he simply asked if he could go first since he only had one item, I would have happily said yes. Instead, he declared that he had one item and was going in front of me. When I told him no, that the polite thing to do was ask first, and instructed him to get behind me in line where he belonged, the situation escalated.
Once behind me, he began complaining loudly to the people behind him about how long I was taking. I turned around and told him that life is too short to be in that much of a hurry, and reminded him again that I would have gladly let him go if he had just asked.
From there, his comments became overtly hostile and chauvinistic. He claimed that because he is a man, he should have gone before me. When he started calling me derogatory names, I saw red. When I feel like I need to defend myself, I defend myself with words, and in that moment, I spoke words that I am not proud of. He went on to remark that I obviously didn't have a man in my life because I didn't know how to obey them. That is when I told him that I've actually had a man in my life for 30 years who treats me with respect, love, and dignity, and would never talk to me the way he was. Looking at his hand, I noticed he wasn't wearing a wedding ring and pointed out that obviously women want nothing to do with him because of how he treats them.
What was most disappointing about the whole ordeal was the environment in the store. There were roughly 20 customers present, along with store staff, and not a single employee or bystander stepped up to intervene, de-escalate the situation, or ask him to leave. Feeling completely unsupported as a customer being verbally harassed, I will no longer be giving Flipside Thrift my business.
A final note for anyone reading:
If you're inclined to judge how I reacted or think I should have just "walked away," please keep in mind that it is much easier said than done. When someone is continuously pushing your buttons and attacking you, defending yourself with your words is a natural response, even if you aren't proud of every word said. It's not always as easy to just walk away as it seems from the outside.
