I am writing this review not only as a complaint, but also as a sincere suggestion for improvement. I hope the hospital takes this seriously because my experience could have been handled differently, and simple changes could help patients in extremely vulnerable situations.
I was admitted to the ICU after a life-threatening allergic reaction to a medication I had never been exposed to before. During a procedure, my throat and esophagus swelled completely shut. I had to be emergently intubated despite the swelling, and I was told I had only a very short window to get oxygen to my brain. Thankfully, the medical team saved my life.
I was unconscious for approximately two days with a breathing tube down my throat. When I woke up, I initially had no idea what had happened to me. It was an incredibly frightening and vulnerable experience.
Most of my ICU nurses were wonderful. They communicated with me about suctioning and understood that I could not speak. They were patient, compassionate, and even allowed my arm restraints to be removed because I was calm and cooperative.
However, I had a very upsetting experience with a nurse named Michael, who I believe was an RN in the ICU.
I had been awake with the tube down my throat for several hours and was calm and accepting of it. I was not asking for the tube to be removed. I urgently needed suctioning.
Because I could not speak, I repeatedly used hand gestures and facial expressions to show that I was having difficulty breathing and needed suctioning. Instead of trying to understand me, I was repeatedly told, "You need to relax" and "Calm down," and that the tube would be removed later.
I tried probably 10-15 times to communicate what I needed. Eventually, I pointed toward paper and a marker. When I was finally given something to write on, I wrote:
"SUCTION. SUCTION. SUCTION. PLEASE!"
Only then did he understand.
That moment was incredibly distressing and traumatizing. Imagine waking up in an ICU after nearly dying, unable to speak, with a tube down your throat, struggling to breathe, and desperately trying to communicate a basic medical need--only to be told to "calm down" instead of being heard.
I understand that an awake patient with an intubation tube may not be the most common ICU situation. But that is exactly why hospitals should have communication tools for patients who cannot speak.
A laminated communication board or simple flashcards on a key ring could make an enormous difference: SUCTION, PAIN, I CAN'T BREATHE, I NEED HELP, BATHROOM, BOWEL MOVEMENT, WATER, COLD, HOT, ADJUST MY BED, LIGHTS ON/OFF, YES, NO.
I also believe nurses working with patients who cannot speak should receive additional training in communication and bedside manner. When someone physically cannot speak, telling them to "calm down" does not solve the problem--it can make them feel helpless and ignored.
I am grateful to the medical professionals who saved my life and to the ICU nurses who treated me with patience and compassion. But this particular interaction should not have happened, and I hope the hospital uses it as an opportunity to improve.
When someone is lying in an ICU bed, unable to speak, unable to breathe normally, and completely dependent on the people around them, being heard is not a luxury. It is part of their care. read more