Ode to the boys on the 41, as reposted from my 8/23/07 MySpace blog:
You know, I'm all for the clean-cut, freshly-shaven, post-collegiate, attractive boys who wanna be Gordon Gecko but could you PLEASE lay off the after-shave? Yes, it is a bit much before 9 AM and yes, I'm probably only saying it because I'm sooo hungover that nothing is staying in stomach today, but the overpowering eau-de-douche commingled with your fierce Starbucks triple-espresso shot breath is putting me over the edge...I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. No, really I did.
And while we're on the topic, please stop clicking the scroll button on your crackberry. It's more than slightly annoying and it's too early Mr. Junior Assistant Vice President. I can assure you that you haven't missed anything yet.
And, brody, could you please bring your voice down a few notches? No, I don't want to hear your epic recount on how "killer" Vegas was for the bachelor party last weekend. We've all been there. Besides, Rehab @ the Hard Rock is soooo 2005.
Sequel, to the girls:
Dear Sorostitutes of the 41,
I understand your need to wear the most uninspired Marina-lolli uniform as every other girl on the bus (and in Cow Hollow for that matter): the Rachel Pally tunic, the matte jersey leggings, the Tory Burch flats, the oversized Marc by Marc Jacobs handbag, your ProductRed iPod Nano, and big black Chanel sunglasses-- really, I do. And I can understand why you think dabbing yourself with a little eau de toilette of your signature scent in your pulse points--the crook of your elbow and back of knees, wrist, neck and cleavage--completes the getting ready process. I know preening is important to us all, especially before the runway show every morning. But must you douse yourself in it? If perchance you should run into your Friday night Mr. Cal-Beta-bro-from-City-Tavern or Saturday night Mr. older-Pac.-Heights-divorce-from-Balboa on the bus whilst engrossed in Eat, Pray, Love, I'm sure he won't remember you by your scent because how can he tell any of you apart? It's not really a signature scent when you're ALL wearing Lovely by SJP! Don't your corporate retail jobs have fragrance-free office policies?!?
Sincerely,
A concerned fellow rider
In short, I ride it because it's a necessary evil, or because I drank the Kool- Aid. It picks me up around the corner from my house and drops me off a block from work. To echo what other yelpers have said, ( in addition to my own personal gripes above) the pitfalls of riding this bus are its unpredictability and irregularity, its crowdedness and the general rudeness of its snug and entitled patrons who don't give up their seats for the elderly who ride. I once saw a geeky 20-something guy on his laptop and playing his stupid techno music full blast on his oversized, ridiculous head-phones flat out say "no" when and much older woman tapped him on the shoulder asking him for his seat. I wanted to ring the pale, pimply guy's neck! ACK! read more