We brought our puppy Charlie home, and understandably, he was not potty or crate trained. Our new…read morevet (and books, trainer, etc. pretty much everyone) agreed: crate training goes hand in hand with potty training.
"Start immediately and don't give in! If you go to him when he cries, he will forever learn that this is how to get out of the crate and he will never learn how to self-soothe!"
And so began 10 days and nights of sleepless hell, with a 4.5 month old puppy who screamed all night and pooped and peed the crate. every night.
every morning I would wash the poop off him and the walls around the crate, and cry, and feel like this cycle would never end.
my son's warm welcome home consisted of shipping him off to airBnBs for a week just so he could sleep at night.
I couldn't sleep all night, my heart breaking, hearing our new puppy cry. I was struggling, trying to follow the advice of all the wise dog owners and specialists, but it was unraveling our family, and I was worried we were going to break our sweet new puppy.
I have to rewind a minute and tell you that Frances offered to come meet us at the foster's home when we first picked him up, to meet Charlie and see where he was raised, and meet his mom and his siblings. She offered to help weigh in when we struggled about taking Charlie or his more mellow sister (but it was always going to be Charlie ). She took time out of our busy day to do this kindness for us, because she loves dogs, and she loves people, and she wants us all to get along.
What happened after we got Charlie home and were
struggling is incredible. I'm pretty strong, but I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown. The stress of having a screaming-all-night-pooping-his-crate-refusing-to-poop/pee-outdoors pup along with a human puppy who needed his sleep while dealing with a new job, it was just about too much. I had entered that unthinkable mental space of "I am just not sure I can do this. I might not be able to... gulp KEEP this sweet puppy!"
I had scheduled Frances to come shortly after we brought Charlie home, to help us with basic "sit, down, stay." I wanted to make sure we had a well-behaved dog who wouldn't jump up on visitors and beg at the table.
I didn't even know enough to be concerned about other issues like socialization and other subtle but hugely important things.
Frances is a born dog-whisperer. She is just one of those people who understands dogs as if they were her
own flesh and blood. When she was young, her fantastic mom offered her a choice between a trip to Disney or a dog. Duh! No contest for Frances. (By the way, 18 years later, she still has this sweet dog!) Turns out, this dog was a challenge. And the story of Frances the trainer begins!
Returning to the story of Charlie:
Frances came by for our first training session (which is as much, possibly more, for the humans than the dog! ) and she could just tell that I was already at a breaking point. She instinctively offered to help in a much bigger way than "sit" and "down". She wanted to check in with her partner to be sure they could weather a screaming puppy, and her partner said "I think you can really help these people, and this puppy!" I was beside myself with gratitude. I mean, they are both just, saints.
So they took in our Charlie, and they had kind of a rough first night where he screamed and pooped himself, and she lovingly bathed him in the middle
of the night, and then started her amazing problem-solving. "What if my incredible dog Leroy can help soothe him and show him it's ok to be in a crate overnight?" Her instincts were golden and that remains the last time Charlie pooped his crate or even cried in it. Leroy and Charlie enjoyed a fine friendship and bedtime routine: charlie inside the crate, and leroy just outside it, slumbering peacefully but right there to soothe charlie if he started to freak out.
After several nights she removed Leroy to make sure charlie could handle it on his own. he could! then she started putting his crate in different rooms
to make sure he'd be able to adapt. he did!
Then her 3 dogs (and Frances! lol) proceeded to help teach Charlie to pee and poop outside! (I had tried and failed for 10 days!) She sent me photos and video updates, with informative and often humorous commentary. I treasured these communications as my hope and confidence grew that we might be able to handle this new puppy after all, after this intervention.
We went to visit him and were greeted by a puppy who now fetched! He was also sitting and lying down on command, and was just so much calmer and secure-seeming. Her dogs contributed to some
much needed socializing, with her careful
supervision.
When team Frances delivered Charlie back to us, we had a puppy who was 100% crate trained, and potty trained. Nothing short of a miracle if you ask us.
She is really smart and kind and funny and interesting. Our puppy adores her. Your and your dog/s would be very blessed to have Frances in your lives!