This is a brand new, Beautiful salon. Lee and her husband are so welcoming. Lee has a very varied…read moreselection of manicure types and colors/nail art. She listens to what you need, and I left so happy with my nails, they're perfect, so pretty. I feel so lucky this salon/Lee are now nearby.
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That was my initial review.
After visiting several times, I had a bad experience with the guy nail tech at the salon, and I saw today that at least one other woman had also posted about a really poor experience with him. -I- had noted his lack of listening, which had consequences for me. I noted to Lee, in person, at the time, that I've had some very significant experiences with men, in the medical arena with access to my body, being unspeakably negligent and arrogant. Has happened to me & family; I had an aunt, for example, who was put into a vegetative state for 12 years due to a doctor's negligence. (My family won a lawsuit against him.) That's an example; and I've had my own experiences.
So, I find it "triggering"- I don't like it- when a man who I am letting do something even Tiny to my body- like doing my nails- can't listen well- elides my words and does Whatever the hell he wants.
Is this hard to understand? Maybe in -my parents'- countries, people don't talk so Openly. But I do; in America, we may. In America we know that people have boundaries to respect, not to spit on or laugh at. I work with autistic kids. They have very strident boundaries... And people who are not like them, and who work with them, -know to respect their difference-. They do not demean difference. Either constitutional difference or difference of experience.
How hubristic. How foolish to judge another that way.
It is wildly unprofessional to demean someone who has expressed a Vulnerability to you...
A vulnerability may be Relatable, and based in patterned/ redundant/ very Common experience. The one I expressed- is Not hard to comprehend. I responded to something in mundane form: that I have experienced before in very salient ways. Not hard to 'get' and empathize with- unless you are being willfully closed/ wish to be a jerk. (Or maybe if by culture you are trained to dismiss what women say- especially when it challenges.)
Anna and the other tech, are barbaric. Chusma pend_jas. What ugly, dehumanizing, small young women.
I had Taken Down the review under a different name today. OK? What you called 8 times about. Because you don't have to Ambush me (anyone), when I Opted For Discretion to give an honest review. Not about you, the owners- who were always so nice to my face. But about the male tech. I wanted to support the other woman who'd had an experience like mine. Since you ignored us......
And you sure decided to punish me for it. Whatever you said to those two young women- to cause them to lay their eyes on me and not take them off me, to have a conversation about me in front of me, and to laugh the whole time.
What dehumanizing, primitive, Wild, unprofessional behavior.
They would Not have behaved that way: if you, the grownups and owners, had set a different tone. It is most always top-down (I mean company culture).
Your daughter might have seen what they did to me (behind you, Lee. They were doing it behind you.). She might not have understood it fully... but she saw people behaving in such a way to a Stranger- who had greeted her mom and her warmly. They/ you all set that example for her.
Again, in some countries, human rights abuses are run-of-the-mill. For example, stoning women to death is legal in some Arab countries. So, for people used to Really ugly things, small incivilities- like not listening to a customer/ a female- might seem laughable. But civility is not only not committing atrocities... it's also about being decent in small ways in everyday life. For the male tech to behave carelessly and dismissively toward Any women- speaks to deeper issues. That was my point. Sorry if it's hard for you to grasp. And sorry you let those women degrade me for speaking.
-Dr. Gutierrez
