In 2014, I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer and Lymphoma. Because of the aggressiveness of the disease, both were treated as Stage IV, under constant supervised care. At one point, I was transferred from Kaiser Downey to Briarcrest Convalescent Hospital and the decision had been made by my husband and by Kaiser. Neither of whom I hold responsible for how I was treated by Briarcrest and their staff.
After being settled, I had extreme eye sensitivity due to the chemotherapy. So I had my portion of the curtain at the window closed. I was in a three bed room, which was too small even for one bed let alone three. Some of the rooms have FOUR beds. Privacy was managed by curtains. When the nurse closed my part of the curtain for the window, I heard the room's other occupant said, "We'll see about that (about my request for my part of the window curtain closed.)!" I had no idea what I was in for. If I had, I would have demanded to be moved, even to home if necessary.
The next night, another patient was wheeled in around 11 pm, named Ida Mae. I do not care if I use her name, nor do I care what happened to her. Ida Mae was furious that "her" spot next to the window had been taken by a younger person, and was livid that she was to be placed in the center slot. I tried to be friendly. I say "tried." There are some people that there is simply no pleasing.
Now I had lost my hair already and was bald. We are talking Patrick Stewart bald. It was very humiliating for me as Native Americans are very protective of their hair-- comes from BIA schools that forcibly cut it off, so it was a bit of a touchy subject. The other nurses told Ida Mae not to disturb me as I had severe cancer and was in constant pain.
Ida Mae did not believe it.
So as I am laying down (it took an hour so it was nearly midnight by the time Ida Mae was settled), the curtain for privacy between Ida Mae's bed and mine swings open. I immediately close it, thinking it was an error.
It opens again. I again close it.
"I don't believe you have cancer. Let me see your bald head!" Ida Mae screams at me.
Excuse me?
I shut the curtain again. My condition is none of her business, and I am not there on display for her pleasure and amusement. I stopped being someone's punching bag over 40 years ago. Polite "No" responses get me nowhere. The harassment continues until 2 am. I have now called for the administrator on duty. They wind up moving her bed and locking down the curtain with furniture. "She doesn't have cancer! I want to see her bald head!"
This is for reals, folks. And it was the beginning of her harassment.
The administrator the next day tries to yell at both of us. At both of us, thinking it was MY fault I had to call for an administrator because Ida Mae was screeching and acting like a self-entitled queen ripping open my privacy curtain every ten minutes between 12 midnight and 2 A.M. "Sorry, but Ida Mae did this on her own. Not my fault." I put my earplugs in and Ida Mae is given a reprimand for her behavior, as the administrator chews both of us out. As if this was my fault that my roommate acted like a complete....well, you can fill in the blanks.
Hubby brings me 32 decibel earplugs. Ida Mae blasts her television all night long. Absolutely NOTHING is done to remedy situation; if I dare to call for help, it's my fault, and Ida Mae demands any nurse called to see me must see her first, as I clearly didn't need any help.
So my husband visits me on a pre-arranged visit with my cat. All the nurses adore my orange tabby moose. This was all I had to look forward to at the time. They were cooing over the big sweetheart and he was so glad to see me he laid on my hospital bed on a special blanket to prevent cat hair and infection. He refused to leave my bed and just purred away. Hearts were melting in that place. Hand sanitizer was used to keep everything sanitary. It was a great visit, and I guess Ida Mae was too busy with television to realize the special guest I had next door. Then, like an unexpected banshee, I hear:
"I want to see your cat! Open your curtains!" Ida Mae was screeching.
This time my response was firm and my tone reflected my disgust with this hospital and my exhausted patience. "No."
Ida Mae did not speak to me again. For which I was profoundly grateful. She did, however, curse me under her breath. I figured, if she treated me with such disregard, I shuddered to think what she would do to my tabby. So she didn't get her way. Fortunately or unfortunately, a giant blood clot sent me back to Kaiser Downey.
No respect for patients, no control over abuse from other patients, and general rudeness. The nurses were the only ones worth being called healthcare professionals. And Briarcrest, feel free to call me to inquire about all this. I'm sure it'll be enlightening. read more
