So...here we are my friends. My 200th review.
I've already done the greatest place on earth "Disneyland", and the greatest thrill park on earth "Cedar Point", So I thought I would review my favorite coaster on the west coast.
Tatsu. Here's the thing about this ride. First of all, it's a flyer, so you are hanging in superman style seating facing STRAIGHT DOWN at the ground beneath you, with nothing stopping you from slamming into the pavement 100's of feet below other than air, which we all know isn't very good at stopping anything really unless compressed.
This air ain't compressed.
Nope, it's the kind of air that screams through your face and your hair, blowing at you and reminding you where you are, amongst the birds and other heavenly bodies. Once you figure out how to mentally get past whatever personal hell you create on your way up that delicious lift hill over the trees, looking down at the ants beneath you, either anxious or terrified of what they would be feeling if the roles were reversed, it becomes adrenaline.
Adrenaline in anticipation of the terrifying drop that awaits you. Then, it happens. You are at the top of the lift hill, which mind you is magnified as horribly as possible because you are at the top of the mountain itself only adding to your terror, and you are now faced with a choice.
Are you going to close your eyes, scream, and pray that you get through this?
or;
Are you going to open your eyes, let your hands and body hang freely, and grip what at this point, is your inevitable destiny for the next two minutes by the balls?
There's only one choice for folks like me. hands out, eyes wide, let it roll.
And with one awesome and forceful swoop down and to the right, you are on your way. You fly back up, feeling more pressure on your chest due to the forces coming FROM YOUR BACK, and you realize how amazing this experience can be...suddenly as if you are in control, and you logically think to yourself how amazing it would be if you could barrel roll in this moment, just as you would if you were a bird, and Tatsu happily obliges, thrusting you in your most likely first parallel whirlwind across a steel track 100's of feet in the air.
You are exhilarated. You aren't sure what to make of what's happening inside of yourself right now, but you don't really have time to think about it, as you barrel roll back the other way now. It is probably this moment in which you find yourself laughing uncontrollably at how free you feel. You slightly dive down toward the patrons walking on the right side of Ninja and think to yourself, "if only you suckers could feel what I feel right now", as you bank back upwards and arch out to the right, U-turning yourself back to where you came from.
Then, seemingly out of nowhere, Tatsu gets pissed. The dragon goes dark. She dives sharply and viciously whips you to the left, and it is this moment, of all the moments in the park minus one other on her little brother X2, that makes you truly question your decision to put your life in the clutches of this mechanical beast only minutes ago. Why?
Because you are facing the world's largest pretzel loop, and the dive that is in front of you, will easily define your visit to Southern California. As if angry with you, Tatsu WHIPS down a good 40 feet to pick up MORE SPEED before she thrusts you back up another 30 feet ONLY TO THROW YOU HEAD FIRST for probably the first time in your life, straight down a good 165 feet before laying you on your back and dragging you against the all too real concrete below.
You easily approach blacking out with the amount of G's being pressed against your humbled and broken human body.
Just when you feel yourself slipping away from consciousness, Tatsu decides you have learned your lesson. That you have had enough. And she brings you back up to what you assume to be safety.
But you'd be a fool to believe it.
As if to make sure you have learned your lesson about trying to tame dragons and poking your little human head where it shouldn't be, she barrel rolls you once more and throws you out of the trees and into the open, above the entrance and the people safely beneath you at the main fountain at the front of the park.
You scream. Tatsu smiles as you play into her hand, knowing your futile screeches have served their purpose, and you have helped her to scare the hell out of anyone that just arrived in the park thinking about coming to play with her.
2 seconds later she whips you back into the trees for one last playful dive before turning left and bringing you back to the beginning of this horribly delicious nightmare.
Tatsu is a world class scream machine, and she is in my top 10 possibly only behind the likes of Millennium Force, Nemesis, and Maverick.
Ride her if you dare. She will blow your mind.
I give Tatsu a ransomed 5 out of 5 stars read more