We have always been a very close family; our sweet girl was what you would call, a "perfect child"…read more Around 14 1/2 years old--after a head on motorcycle crash nearly took my husband's life--my daughter began experiencing depression and anxiety, which, coupled with some bad friends coming into her life, caused her to not only pull away from us, but to cling more closely to these disastrous influences. She started self-harming, and became suicidal. It got to where I couldn't even hug her anymore, we were so at odds. We just wanted to save her life, and she was pushing us away. Within two years, she had been through several therapists, and was on several kinds of medication. We were losing our minds. My husband and I thought we were going to lose our marriage over it. This was literally the worst point of my life, and the thought of all three of us driving off a cliff together was a thought that crept in over many sleepless nights.
A miraculous turnaround of events led us to Anasazi. We could not tell our daughter about the decision to send her to this wilderness therapy program, as we were afraid she would harm herself. I don't think my husband and I slept that night before... I kept silent vigil over her all night. That next morning, dropping her off was so difficult. But there was something so comforting and so right about it. These people had peace in their hearts, and unconditional love for the kids that came into their care. That much was clear from the beginning. It was like nothing we had experienced with any other place we had been to, or talked with.
As the weeks went by, we had seen such a change in her through the letters that she sent home. The curriculum that my husband and I engaged in--something that is truly different and completely self-enlightening--taught us to have hearts at peace, rather than hearts at war. I learned that parenting from a place of fear, frustration, really anything other than pure love, is a heart at war... even if love is driving the emotion. We learned that we needed to make changes in our home, trust her more, step back and allow our daughter to stand on her own 2 feet and learn consequences. Helicoptering would not work, nor would coddling her. When we met up with her during family camp after 8 weeks, The change in her countenance was so evident, it left me breathless!! She was open, wiser than I ever had seen her, and so excited to teach us how to live on the land. The hugs that returned upon our reunion, have not ended.
Anasazi will not FIX our children. What it DOES do, is equip families and individuals to make better choices, find their worth, and appreciate the families they walk with. They will have ups and downs, and sometimes may walk backwards. But in the words of my daughter, "If I want better, I have to BE better. If I'm standing still out of fear for my future, I'm really backwards walking." She will have many hurdles throughout her life--depression and anxiety have an ironclad will of their own--and we continue to have our struggles. Our family has greatly benefited, and so has she. I credit Anasazi with much of the benefits we now experience. But as I said, few children come out of Anasazi completely healed. We all remain works in progress...just wiser.
We did not see any pushing of "Mormon doctrine", or any other kind of church talk--In fact, I would call any assertion that there is, plain HOGWASH, likely from someone working with a competitor upset with Anasazi's awesomeness.
We are now, and will forever be an Anasazi family. I am so proud of my young walker, and how far she has come. Because of her experience with these amazing people and program, she has decided she wants to be a therapist, and is presently taking classes at the junior college. She also wants to return as a trail walker when she becomes 21. That speaks volumes! Just about every Friday, we attend parent panel, where she is able to tell incoming parents her story, along with other young walkers who've walked the trail--she doesn't like to miss parent panel, unless she's feeling bad after a few wrong choices, which of course still happens. Her faithfulness to this program, and our continued commitment to employ the Arbinger institute principles, and everything we have learned through Anasazi, have bonded us together in a way that we never would have ever been blessed to have experienced. Would I ever go back to those dark times just to have this experience? Heavens no. But I am grateful for the growth we have all experienced because of it. Onward and upward, and forward walking (with a bit of backward walking, just to keep things interesting).
