I only looked up IBOK's Yelp reviews after having an upsetting experience with them, which I think is worth sharing for others navigating the adoption process.
I was initially very excited about IBOK, particularly their thoughtful two-cat policy, which made a lot of sense to me. They were also flexible and kind about my living a few miles outside of Santa Clara County. I was approved to adopt and the process started off on a positive note.
After being approved, I was quickly directed to a specific pair of kittens who were older than I'd hoped for. They sounded wonderful, but while young, they don't look like what you picture when you think "kittens." Our family recently lost our 20-year-old cat, and my children, who are younger than that cat, have always hoped to experience raising kittens. The initial email recommending the pair was polite and said if we didn't feel they were the right fit, there would be many others to consider. I felt bad tentatively turning down the pair they suggested and said as much in my reply. They quickly let me know that I might have to wait a few months because it was not kitten season.
What made the situation upsetting was what happened next. A few days later, IBOK posted about eight 7-8 week old kittens on their Facebook page, asking for foster help. I was excited to see young kittens despite it not being "kitten season" and I inquired if it might be possible to adopt a pair instead of fostering as we are probably not up to giving up kittens we've taken into our home! We got our last cat at this age. I also commented (in what I thought was a friendly way) that the kittens were all cute and that one particularly reminded us of our late cat.
The response I received was unexpectedly harsh. Part of the text read:
"As you were not interested in the kittens we recommended to you as a perfect fit, you may want to look at other rescues for your new kittens. Wanting kittens as young as possible isn't a characteristic we look for in our adopters. We want the best match possible for our kittens, and you do not seem to be looking for a match that would be in the best interests of our kittens. We're sorry, but you asked us for help in finding the right pair for you, and we did that. But you were not interested. You should be looking for the right personalities, not just how they look."
This response made me feel hurt, stupid, and misunderstood, and I regretted commenting on the kittens' cuteness, as it was meant to be chatty and friendly. It also made me feel very judged for expressing a preference for younger cats, which I already felt bad about but hadn't realized would disqualify us as adopters. Despite feeling upset, I responded apologetically to her text (even though my husband suggested I simply reply, "Are you OK?"). I dislike confrontation and understood that they were not going to let us adopt, but I didn't want to leave on a bad note. I never received a response back.
As someone who works with a horse rescue, I understand how those in deep in the trenches of rescue work are often overwhelmed and exhausted. Still, I think it's important to assume the best of people who come to you hoping to love and care for animals. My interaction left me feeling like one of the Dursleys, and it's going to take me some time to build up the nerve to approach another rescue group. I know I should re-examine my preferences too.
I imagine that adopting through IBOK could go well if you accept the cats they recommend for you, avoid expressing preferences about age or commenting on appearance, and pass their tests. Their focus on finding the best match for their cats is admirable, but I think they could benefit from more compassion and openness when communicating with adopters. Especially after reading the other reviews, I'm sure many people would likely be willing to adjust their plans if guided thoughtfully.
(I'm leaving 3 stars because I think that's the fairest option considering I only experienced one small part of the adoption process.) read more