Birthing Aurelia Aven with Merrie by our side ....
Dear expectant mommy,
If you are reading this, you are most likely considering having a birth doula by your side when the time comes to welcome your treasure into the world. If you are having any doubts about your curiosity and interest, or having trouble enrolling your partner in the idea, I hope our experience serves to assure you of one of the BEST investments we made in preparation for birthing our Aurelia.
I was initially drawn to the idea of having a doula, since it has been proven over and over that having the support of a woman during birth makes for an often easier, faster, and less painful process. If you didn't know, the presence of a doula is also known to decrease the likelihood of Caesarean Birth.
As I prepared for the epic initiation into motherhood, my husband JP and I started dialoguing more about our thoughts, feelings, and fears. It became a concern to me how well my husband would do with seeing me in so much pain. I needed to know he would be well supported, and that someone could advocate for all three of us if necessary.
When I imagined the possibility of being transferred from the birthing center to the hospital, I knew JP would remain by my side all the way, and I knew a trusted doula would not only be there for me and my husband, she would potentially be the one to hold our baby if we were indisposed for any reason. That was the moment I knew with absolute certainty that I wanted a birth guardian.
Merrie was the third Doula I connected with. As wonderful as they all were, what set her apart for me is she is a mother of four, and has experienced almost every birth scenario I had imagined. Birthing at home, birthing at a birthing center, a vaginal hospital delivery, and nearly a Cesarean Birth. She has her Doula training and experience, as well as midwifery training she is in the process of completing. It was enormously reassuring that we would glean from all that wisdom.
When we met Merrie in person with my husband this time, her easy going, flexible, and bright nature confirmed my gut feel that she was the birth doula for us.
In the weeks leading up to our daughter's arrival, Merrie was a wealth of information and a constant support. Our discussions ranged from birth preparation to breastfeeding and vaccines once the baby was born. Whatever came up (including some interesting family dynamics), she was there to be an ear, and to offer sage advice and other valuable resources.
We had fortunately attended prerequisite birth classes, as well as a few electives at Mountain Midwifery, and the Mama'hood (Birthing from Within). It was a blessing to have what we had learned reinforced and in some instances elaborated on. We discussed our birth preferences and felt confident Merrie would help ensure our wishes were carried out (especially if we landed in hospital).
The big day arrived. I went into labour at 1am on my due date (January 19th). I texted with Merrie as I went through the motions and when we felt it was time, she came to our home to help monitor my progress and keep me as comfortable as possible. Before her arrival, I sensed my hubby was reeling from exhausted excitement and disbelief. He was visibly calmer once Merrie arrived at 5:30 that morning. Don't underestimate the importance of a calm environment when birth begins.
Things progressed fast. I could feel myself entering a different realm of reality. I am grateful that I felt comfortable enough to leave the logistics to JP and Merrie while I allowed myself to surrender to my body and inner primal instincts (an imperative part of the process). When we arrived at the birth center, I felt confident enough in our connection to tell Merrie exactly what I needed and how I needed it. She was by my side to fetch, carry, and step into whatever gap I felt or she intuited.
From the logistics of keeping me hydrated, applying counter pressure to my sacrum, and making sure I had everything I needed, to the emotional needs of standing firm with my husband and encouraging us both, Merrie anchored us with so much grace, ease, and love. I felt loved, supported, and protected - again, so important for the birthing process.
Merrie was an extra trusted pair of hands, eyes and ears. She was an awesome cheerleader, awesome friend, and photographer! My husband is one of the kindest, sensitive human beings I know. We have a deep emotional connection, and he is very intuitive when it comes to reading me. That being said, there is something about having a woman by your side who has "been there". Who knows what it takes to birth a baby.
This is a marathon like no other and it's completely unpredictable! I cannot imagine doing it without my amazing support crew - my husband JP, Merrie, midwife Natalie, & nurse Sophi.
Thank you for how you showed up for us Merrie. We could have done it without you, so glad we didn't. xxx read more
