I just visited this store. I met who was apparently the owner at the front door. He cracks the door open, sticks his head out. I say "hello." He replies "what you want?" No hello in return. No greeting. Just a terse one line response. "What you want?"
Of course, I'm immediately taken aback because I'm not used to being met at the door of businesses I'm trying to patronize in such a way. I didn't understand what the hell was going on and he keeps pointing at a sign inside the tinted window, which I can't read, and repeating "what you want?" Over and over. I say "I don't really know what I want. Obviously something that you might sell in this store." His response - "What you want? You must call!"
I'm having a very hard time getting my head around exactly what is transpiring here...
Finally I figure out that this business apparently desires that their customers call to make an appointment before they come in their store. Now, mind you this is a smoke shop. They sell rolling papers and bongs, not the Mona Lisa or 20 carat diamonds. I say "this isn't how stores are supposed to do business. Screw this. I'm not making an appointment to enter a smoke shop!"
At which point the gentleman launches into an unhinged tirade about the alleged absence of a penis in my underwear! Holding up his pinky finger with his thumb placed just on the tip of it, he asks over and over again, "do you have one? Do you even have one? Show me! Do you even have one? F*ck you! Go away! Don't come back! Do you have one? You don't have one! Show me!" As me becomes frantically agitated, he develops this incredible inquisitiveness about whether or not I have a penis, even though all my physical traits would indicate that it's a pretty safe bet to infer that in fact I do have one. Yet he remains pretty unconvinced.
Yep. I got called out for apparently not having a penis simply because I couldn't lock on to the fact quickly enough that the local smoke shop had implemented a policy requiring that customers call before visiting their store. Never mind that the OPEN sign was lit and he was standing the door, so obviously the store was staffed at the time.
Oh well. Guess my brain is just too slow and my genitals are just too underdeveloped to qualify as a desirable customer for this business. So, unless you've got a really large brain and giant meat, go down the road to Green Light Smoke Shop. You don't have to take an IQ test or whip out your junk to buy papers there. You can even walk right in, no appointment necessary. read more
