Will someone please bring our brekky!
Fifteen minutes to get served and another fifteen minutes since, and we still haven't got our order!
Never done a review in real time before but this is ridiculous!
Righto - iced coffees have arrived and now Keeno's cappuccino has landed, each have been declared good so one star lifts to to two.
Ten minutes later - still no brekky. Mr Douche (borrowed name from earlier review) tells us 'it's on the pass' in a manner that informs me precisely of his level of concern. 'Up your own pass'...I mutter to myself.
The problem, Douche asserts, has been that they had a table of eleven. No ! Eleven ?? Presumably eleven whole people wanted some service and something to eat. Maybe a coffee. So why ignore the other twenty five people in the place? It must have stunned them into paralysis that so many people would choose to try and get fed at this dump.
In retrospect, it seems like a mathematical quirk that at least 36 people who had never been here before - because this is a place you only go to once - would separately make the same mistake at the same time.
OK - the wrap up;
- D1's mushrooms are inedible. It's is impossible to burn mushrooms so the 'cook' (generously described) must have used a pan that he had already burnt something else in (possibly my bacon) and then added some sand or other grit to ensure they could not be eaten. I wondered if the delay might have been due to a trip down to the beach to get some sand? D2 thought it more likely that the mushies had not been properly cleaned and still had some dirt in them. She is a vegetarian who ate dirt when she was little, so I deferred to her better judgment. I took her plate back and spoke with Douche explaining that the forty minute wait should have been used to make something that people can actually eat. He responded very helpfully. He said 'Oh', and then took the plate away.
-Keeno's muesli ? - "very ordinary, from a packet and a bit stale and dry"
-D2? Ate her toast and jam without comment but that was probably because she was sulking after D1 scolded her about ordering bacon on the side. Which she ate, in silence.
-My bacon and eggs with semi dried tomatoes? Burnt bacon, plain unseasoned scrambled eggs topped with two wilted basil leaves and no semi dried tomatoes.
-GHB - ate none of the scrambled eggs at all.
Dumbfounded.
My first ever one star review. read more