[Cue me sporadically bursting into (quietly) singing The Lonely Island's "I'm on a Boat," featuring T-Pain. (sorry about the swearing, mom.)]* There are no airs at this bar and this is why I love it here. Well, that and the world's nicest bartenders work behind the bar. I don't think I'd sprawl out too comfortably on the couches though, because who knows when they've last been cleaned. But, isn't that part of the charm of a dive bar? Yes. A group of us wandered over here on a Friday night after midnight and it wasn't crowded at all. As others have previously noted, the jukebox is legendary. Seriously. It's as if your best friend made you a mix tape (aw, I miss those!). My friend M. and I got dizzy while tilting our heads reading all the various scrawled song titles on these mostly mix cds. We had fun singing** Billy Bragg's "Greetings to the New Brunette" and ending the evening (sadly saying goodbye to my friend M. who lives in Europe) serenading each other with the Smiths' "Half a Person." Aww. Good friends + cheap drinks + Boat Bar = good memories. *Really, look it up on you tube. I did the hand gestures and everything. No, this joke didn't get run into the ground by me and my friend J. No, because I *never* do that. (sarcasm duly noted). **And no, my friend and I were not the douchebags who drink and sing loudly at the top of our lungs much to the chagrin of the other patrons. We are the quiet drunks who sing quietly. read more

The Pre-Ramble: Bars with a great Single Malt Scotch Selection have to get the 5-Star Review. Bars with a great 'tending staff that pour your Scotch like it'll be the very last Scotch you'll ever drink also have to get the 5-Star Review. Bars with an amazing Jukebox - although, having mixed CDs . . . isn't that, like, cheating? - qualify to get the 5-Star Review. Bars with character - a collection of decor, lighting, 'tenders, liquors selection - also qualify to get the 5-Star Review. The Ramble: After gobbling up some tasty "Kyoto style Obanzai" at Hibino and downing a bottle of Sake, a couple of friends I had to get serious about drinks. Chris H.'s Cousin-in-Law happened to live in Carroll Gardens, so he brought us to The Boat, the place where he'd met his Wife (Chris H.'s Cousin). My first impression of all Dive Bars is just that: It's a Dive Bar. Dingy? Check. Dark? Check. Tats all-around? Check. Random-ass decorations? Check. Random men sitting alone in corners? Check. But after a few hours of sitting at the bar and chatting with the 'tender and mingling with the varied crowds in there, it was clear that The Boat was no run-of-the-mill Dive. I also found my new favorite Single Malt Scotch. The Balvenie 21. I asked for a Balvenie neat, and to my surprise, the 'tender asked, "You want the 12 or the 21?" "21?" I asked back, ears pricked. I may have panted a bit, too. We asked to see the bottle. Funny: The owner had taped a message to the unopened bottle, saying, "$20. IT'S GOOD!!!" Our 'tender explained that the owner was something of a Scotch guy himself and that's why they had a good selection, as she poured me more than just a dram of that GOOD STUFF. I wish Fort Greene had a local bar like this. read more

Owned by people who also owned a place I really loathed, Great Lakes. Which just goes to show that I'm an inconsistent asshole whose life is governed by a total lack of standards, consistency, and moral fiber. But anyway. I should have known better. I was young and very dumb. I occasionally made smart choices, like Between the Bridges Pub. I occasionally made OK choices like 119 Bar. I often eschewed objectively great choices like O'Connor's or Montero's because girls who didn't really care for my bullshit anyway were drinking elsewhere. (Oh, a place where you have to know a secret phone number to then wait ten minutes while a dude custom shaves ice for your elderberry cordial cocktail. That sounds fun! I really prefer when you guys go to Odessa, but weird cocktail that costs more than a college textbook also sounds great! Or failing that, weird "secret" nightclub that sells only 555 cigarettes, and only for $17.50! I'm in!) But I also thought it was so, so amazing that there were "hip" businesses popping up all along Smith Street. Didn't this used to be, I thought, a pretty windswept street? Hispanic bank here. Butcher down there. Korean market inexplicably preferred by my mother despite its considerable remove from her usual errands trajectory. That was it. But now...all sorts of new and exciting cocktail appreciation dens, nooks, and crannies. Oh, here's a place that has chilled Sauternes. I don't even know what Sauternes is, so I guess I'll go there. ... What a dumb POS I was. I will not say that Boat Bar is the Platonic ideal of a bar. I will not pretend that the jukebox is half as good as it's rumored to be. I mean, The Rentals were fine. Just like the Ass Ponys. But what we REALLY need is Bernard Purdie or something. And there are plenty of Mast Brothers here. Plenty of people who know where to buy ethically sourced yarn. But this is what a bar is supposed to be. It seems like it's possible to get Captain Lawrence in an appropriate glass. But with Genesee, Bud, Coors, shots specials, loud music, dark atmosphere, lots of smells, it's OK. A better bar is the one that has a steady crowd at 4 PM. A guy in a suit who tucked out early. A man reading yesterday's newspaper. A fraternity of bus drivers who come in at 11:25 PM sharp on Wednesdays. A guy who can sing Lee Dorsey songs REALLY well. But failing that, and, no, we're never getting 1995 back, this is at least good for really good nostalgia in short, irregular doses. Best bar on Smith by a motherfucking mile. read more

Warning: This review takes full advantage of cheesy humor. Not for the faint of heart. I am convinced that the best bars in the city do not have their name plastered up above the curb. This place being one of them, I never knew the name until maybe the 4-5th time I was here. Just look for the red door, but try not to paint it black. ah HEM.....so yeah, great beer selection, great service, you can score a couch in the back, the Pacman/Galaga TABLE(!) in front, or a comfy wooden bar stool. Be sure to check out the jukebox and the fancy illustrations on the napkins in lieu of actual album covers. A great place to unwind, and truly a good social scene. Go overboard at Boat!! read more

My word, it's like a slaughterhouse in there. I mean this in the best possible way, in case you were wondering. Drinks are strong, music is pretty good, ownership is friendly and accommodating, and I've only had a bad time here once so far. The scene can be a little lame at times, but what can you do. It's still a comfy bar to go for a few drinks before moving on to the next watering hole down the street. Four stars because Boat is an unpretentious dive bar with decent prices and (sometimes) a photogenic crowd. read more

What a fantastic dive. I love me a good dive. The waitress who works Wednesdays during happy hour is super great, and plays stellar music. I think they have a jukebox but no one should ever play it while she is working, because her music selection is great. Their happy hour is from 5-8, and it's not usually that busy, so you can get real drunk in that time. Happy hour special is $4 for draft beer or well drinks, which is the perfect price. They have a solid draft selection. It's very clean for a dive. I never feel gross in the bathroom. Plenty of seating. read more

The Fireplace And jukebox Make this the best Dive(ish) bar on Smith Street where you might sit. read more

The bartenders at this bar are just great. I go on all different nights. Its a great dive bar that is welcoming to all in the community. Its dark, a bit grimey and touched with graffiti. There's lots of wood and dark wooden furniture. It is dark in there in general. The clientele is ecclectic. There is no single type of client in this place. That is what makes it cool. Different social types all interacting with each other. What could be more quintessentially Brooklyn. Nearby there are some good eateries. Come give this joint a try and you might run into me there. read more

First time in New York .. didn't know what to expect. But all I knew was that I needed a drink. So I walked to the nearest bar. Walked in to boat bar and had the greatest first night in New York . The bartender dan was hilarious, very nice and welcoming. Being from San Diego I didn't know what to expect at a dive bar , with a pool table and a dark ambience in Brooklyn. I ended up having one of the best new bar experience ever. I even left to check out a different bar and came back the same night . 10 out of 10 I would recommend this bar to anyone who is looking for a real dive bar. read more

No boats but they've got beers!!!! Not really fantastic beers but it's cheap!!! Wooooot it's also kinda grimy but whatever you're probably drunk anyways!!! One star off for not honoring my request to play "i'm on a boat". read more

Smith St. is chock full of cool eateries and places to enjoy fancy bevs. But sometimes you want basic and cheap. This place is basic and cheap. It's simply a bar. There are some other places nearby who try to fit this mold, but they also try to be something for everyone... a sports bar, ethnic joint, vintage joint, etc. This place isn't Irish or Polynesian. They have no food. No TVs. There's a shared bathroom. But it works. I like dives but sometimes they don't work. Sometimes they are too divey. This place works. I can't comment on their beer selection or wine stock. I don't care. They have beer. They have wine (limited). Plus other stuff. If you are too picky, you shouldn't go here. The barkeep will get to you once she's finished checking her Twitter account.. The music will remind you of crazy ex girlfriends form 1995. But somehow it's all cool. read more

This is a place that I go to when I am in the area. Complete with a working fireplace, this place is cozy, yet divey-fab, once you find it because the exterior is so understated. The jukebox is OK, but interestingly enough, filled with pictures of the staff. The bar is nice and long and the drinks are priced just right. I have only been here when it is not crowded and that's what makes it perfect for meeting up with a friend or two during the week after work. I would say this is one of my favorites of the area. There is scaffolding all over the street as well as many parking signs to lock your bike up to. As always, I prefer scaffolding. read more

I usually don't write reviews for bars or clubs because the amount of fun you have is more dependent on the people you're with than the place you're at... That said, Boat Bar is awesome. It's awesome in its totally crappy awesomeness. The "decor" looks like somebody ran through a thrift store and just bought out the $1 bin. The bathrooms have classy signs on the outside depicting various combinations of multiple people in there -- apparently, bathroom bar sex was a real problem here at some point. The back corner is lit solely by 2 red lights (seriously) and 2 pinball machines (seriously). The jukebox has photos of random people, but is comprised almost entirely of good mix tapes. Steve was our bartender for the night and the man is the coolest bartender in New York. (Granted, there's a low standard there, but he's an awesome guy.) Ask him if he ever does it Mexican style. read more

Everyone always wants to go to the boat, and i can hardly argue with them. It's fun, has a great jukebox, and the bartenders are friendly as hell. It has a late night weekend tendency to get so packed you can't move, but on a weeknight, it's totally relaxed and can be a blast. read more

What can i say.....I moved from Philly in 2001, Sept 11th to be exact, to "Carroll Gardens" and ended up working behind the bar at The Boat. The next three years ended up being the most memorable to date...I miss you, Boat, old friend. No bar gig has lived up to you since. Sigh. read more

Smith St is full of bars to suit all tastes. You can go classy with places like Sample or full on dive bar, such as Boat Bar. This place is no frills, it's all about the cheap booze. Plenty of seating. When Phil and I arrived, there was no bartender to be seen and we were sort of confused until we were told that she was outside for a smoke. Yeah, it's that kind of place. Later on in the evening, she hopped over the bar to kick a guy out that was, what it looked like, asking for money. Most places have a CC minimum like $10/$20 but here, it's a 2 drink minimum, which is no problem, as booze is cheap and abundant. If you like dive bars, you'll love Boat Bar. read more

This place has been around for at least 8+ years, which is remarkable in terms of Brooklyn bars, and says something about its character. My friends and I used to joke that this was always the bar where at least one couple was guaranteed to be making out--it's dark, has couches and a fireplace, and different seating sections. If you find yourself looking for a nice post-Smith-St-dinner-date bar, this might be a wise selection. Stellar jukebox, which is also entertaining for at least an hour, since most of the albums are mixes. I tried to find one of my favorite songs that used to be on the jukebox here years ago last night, to no avail, so they have certainly updated the music selections since then. Nice beer selection, big enough bar that you also have a good chance of snagging a seat or two on a weekend night. read more

Boat Bar has a solid happy hour (5-8) special. You can get a draught beer or a stiff well for $4. I appreciate the decent beer lineup. The rotating draught list includes, anchor steam, blue moon, lagunitas IPA, Brooklyn lager, Kelso, six point, and Guinness. For those of your looking not to break the bank. The genesee cream ale pints are always $3. Not too many bars in Brooklyn serve suds for that price. Make sure to bring hard currency, cash only, still. The bartender is nice and she is constantly walking back and forth to make sure people have drinks. I like the vive of this place and the dim lighting that sets the mood. Great music on the jukebox, cheery customers, and laid back drinking. Pull a stool and take a seat. read more

I like Boat. It has beer and beer is good. The bartenders have never struck me physically. The jukebox has songs on it that make you feel nice. And the couches magically turn into beautiful women that accept you for who you are. read more

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This is the dive bar you left behind when you moved out of (choose one: LES/East Village/Williamsburg/Bushwick) years ago because the yuppies co-opted your vibes and spots and watering holes. And it's been here under your nose all along! I had no idea this neighborhood had a safe haven for those of us who just want to be weird in the dark in peace. But here you go. read more

The Boat Bar is a "by-the-numbers" dive bar with a few quirks that neither make nor break the experience. Call me disenchanted "youngster," but a jukebox and Mrs. Pacman do not impress me. What I enjoyed about this bar was its atmosphere and its ample seating. The bar counter was not mobbed and people were not pushing to get past each other. The dimmed lights and candles added to the laid-back character of this bar. I was surprised by how many people this bar could seat. There were small tables in front, bar stools along the long bar, and booths for larger groups in the back. Overall, this bar does a good job in facilitating the gathering of friends. Exciting, it is not, but I'll strongly consider returning if I'm in the neighborhood and looking for a low-key evening. read more

Popped into boat bar a few weeks ago before Thanksgiving. My friends and I were looking for a place to relax on a Saturday afternoon before heading to a concert. Boat Bar was laid back and just the place to escape the cold. My friends and I sat at the bar and had a ball with the bartender. She was lively and provided great service. Drinks were solid and affordable. Overall, I would definitely return for an afternoon beer to relax and chat with friends. read more

Like a good neighbor...Boat Bar is there! It's comfy like Kurt Cobain's sweater on MTV Unplugged, but without the smell of drugs on it. It just feels like home. Go there with a buddy or two. read more

My memories of this spot are of a glorious classless neighborhood shithole of the most charming and endearing sort. On a recent visit, though, after pumping $5 into their AMAZING juke box, which the bartender had to have seen us doing, we noticed that she was cueing the songs off of a stealthily stashed IPod. Extremely not cool. Plus it was thrashing heavy metal that her and two of her friends at the bar seemed to be into. I mean am I that big of a loser for wanting to wash down my evening with a little Death Cab? C'mon now. This place needs to shape up or boat out. The hype = don't believe it! read more

Getting old really bites. Reading the reviews of this bar makes me feel really really old. And that bites. I don't give a good goddam about the hipsters or the juke or the mofo pinball machine. I want a drink, and mayhap a spot of irrelevant conversation. This bar delivers that. And it also gives you Susie, who is a dead ringer for Diana Troy (Star Trek NG), and a sweetie pie to boot. Let's review: Dark bar. Big glass of Wild Turkey. Cute barmaid. What's not to like? read more

This Bar is pretty awesome... no sign outside.. which makes it even more awesome.. if you prefer the more pretentious scene (that other BK bars in the neighborhood seem to offer) this is not the place for you. Happy hour was pretty sweet.. no sign outside advertising how "cheap" their happy hour is.. so i didn't even know it was occurring when i popped in one afternoon after a self determined early dismissal from work.. saddled on up to the bar with my gf and ordered a six point and a blue moon for 6 bucks.. which i thought was pretty cheap.. till i saw the handwritten happy hour sign behind the very cool bartender... Since i live mere two blocks away.. i have officially named this my "neighborhood bar"!! read more

I live off Smith Street, and there are tons of bars here. This one is the best because it doesn't even try. They call it the boat bar, because it has a model of a small boat over the bar, but they also have a broken leg of a mannequin, a mirror and other random objects, so it could've well been called Broken Leg bar, or Mirror Bar, or Have a Bathroom bar... They don't repair their couches by anything other than duct tape, and that's what makes this place super comfortable, not to sit in, but to go just a little distance from your worries. Only on weekdays though. Weeknights they crank up the volume, and defeat themselves. Also, the music is amazing, because it's not generally a random ass Pandora station but is the music of the bartenders, curated by and for a person who you get to know without even talking to them, although you can talk to them as well. read more

This place is too much fun! Cheap drinks, great music, cool laid back people. Taking away 1 star because it can get too crowded on saturday nights. But it's great the other nights. read more

Went here for a date and had a fun time. Lots of seating with the bar area in the front, and couches/booth area in the back. It was nice coming in to sit by the fire. Wasn't too crowded on a Sunday night either, good date spot. The music was awesome, although a touch loud which is why I took off one star. read more

Coming to NYC, you'd never think you could find a place with $3 beers. But Boat is just that. It's a little dive bar on Brooklyn's hopping Smith Street, and it's perfectly uncrowded on a weekday night between 5-8pm. So uncrowded, mother's bring their babies there and sit them right up on the bar. Yeah, I'm not down with that, but I understand that's what you get when you hang out in Brooklyn bars these days. Nontheless, their $3 happy hour beer selection is awesome. They have some great beers on top including some microbrewed IPAs and Toasted Lagers. Their wheat beer was delicious. And I couldn't believe I walked out of there with such a low bar bill after getting to throw a few ones back with some cool people. This might be a regular stop on my trips to Brooklyn from now on. read more

Been here two Saturdays in a row, and both times, was packed with young people. Lots of good liquor to choose from (they have Glen___ scotch, fill in the blank with Morangie, Fiddich, Livet). Reasonably priced, as well. Some of the bartenders are super hot, and great to talk to. I fed $2 into the jukebox, and my songs didn't play. Something's up with that. read more

I've been to the boat bar about 3 times. The weekday happy hour until 8pm is fantastic, $3 beers on tap or well drinks. The beer selection is pretty decent: Guiness, Six Point (an IPA and Sweet Action), Stella, Hoegaarden(!) and a few others. The well drinks are mixed nicely and I generally leave with a decent buzz. The big con about this place is the bartenders which are hit or miss. One, which I've had twice, was pretty rude and played music so loud I couldn't even have a conversation with my group. I demand very little from my bartenders, a simple, "Hey, how's it going?" and a look of acknowledgement every so often would be nice, but no cigar with this one. Last time she seemed to be more interested in talking to her friends and eating her dinner than providing service to her patrons. Yes, I will be back, I like the selection in the jukebox and if the music wasn't so obnoxiously loud sometimes, I would even take a casual date here. I could easily see how you can stay an entire happy hour and then not mind paying regular price for drinks if you had good company and the bartender was't a wench. I definitely recommend this bar after a long day at work. Management: Please, remind your staff to smile and be friendly, they may actually get better tips. read more

I'm a total regular here now. Suzy is the best bartender ever. Don't forget to tip!! Anyone can come here and fit in. No snobs here (and if they come in, they're usually turned off by the laid back demeanor). Good for a date, or to go alone and have a drink and meet someone. They even let you bring in food, so long as you're not messy and clean up after yourself. I've come here in the evening to wind down, with a book and drink and I've also come here to party with friends/family. It's that kind of bar. Drinks are so affordable and never watered down. **The music is really great and they take requests (don't abuse the system!) My mom and I were here Saturday and she nicely asked Suzy if she had any James Brown and sure enough, Suzy played some James Brown. read more

There are three things that I like in a bar: 1. It has to have good music and a good jukebox. 2. Cheap beer/happy hour. 3. Pinball (Screw you Buck Hunter people) Boat used to succeed on all three of these things until they got rid of the pinball. Now I have to go to Bar Great Harry for the pinball but the cheap beer makes up for it. Also, on the whole, the bartenders are pretty damn nice which is awesome. You can't really discount how amazing 3 dollar happy hour is for beers like six point and blue point and even anchor steam. So....in recap. Highly recommend this place. Get a new pinball game. read more

This review is solely for the GIRL BARTENDER. My boyfriend and his friends came out here to get drinks, and they asked her to use the restroom and she gave them such an attitude for no reason, and when they confronted her she starting to cuss at them they left... LOL I am genuinely shocked why they have someone serving drinks and meeting customers when she can't even have some decency talking to people. Judging from the other reviews we're not wrong skip this bar and go next door they have much nicer service and are better all around. read more

10 years and still going strong. I've always had a positive experience in this place. Great happy hour, decent beer selection, and bartenders have decent music on their ipods. I'm not too crazy about the juke box, it used to be better back in the day. Oh yeah, before I forget to mention it.. Table Ms PacMan.. Nothing like drinking a billion beers and playing pacman on the slower nights. All in all a good time. read more

I've been going to this bar for about 10 years and even though I feel a little old now when I go, I still love it. I feel that everyone can just be his or herself here with no issue. I do love a good dive bar. No sign or pretention. Just relaxing. The candles, couches and fireplace make it comfortable. Music in the jukebox has always been great. Lots of memories when selecting The Smiths or R.E.M. The bartenders have always been nice. I remember Billy fondly. Miss you! I also tend to get a seat at the bar, a table, or on one of the couches pretty easily. Sometimes it gets crowded, but not overwhelming. Bathrooms are typical for a dive bar. Obviously, don't sit down. I have always found soap and toilet paper without an issue, though. I also find that it is easy to make conversation here. p.s. If you don't want to be around people who may be drinking a lot, partying with friends, or laughing loudly, go somewhere else. read more

The music is loud and angry, the drinks are moderately priced, and the conversations are usually fairly intelligent. Great place to unwind after work on a week night. I've also hosted a few small parties here and the staff was very helpful. read more

It's not everyday that a dive bar gets five stars, but what can I say. I'm a regular and Boat bar never disappoints. Let's start by the wondeful fact that all the bartenders are female. Ok, you've already won me over. What's more they're badass & know how to hold down the roof. And I've seen a few crazies walking in here at 2am. :) For my money go for the bluepoint. It's like the pinnacle of beer making. But of course they have a full bar, of rums & ryes, gins & vodkas for you liquor lovers. Sadly the jukebox has been broken for a while. But you can always make requests or plug in your smartphone. :) read more

There are no dart boards here. Additionally, the tall bartender is not very nice. We thought it was just us, but several regulars told us that he is, to paraphrase, a not nice dude. read more