Scam! The security guard chose to charge us $10 after learning it was our first time visiting the place. It was clear there was no cover and yet that was his choice. I do hope it wasn't due to the color of our skin. read more

The best Club I have visited. Great Food, Service is awesome, Ambiance the best. I have been absent 3 years, but I am planning to go back real soon. I was well threated and could not have asked for a better service. The whole place is awesome. I hope it never closes. The most beautiful Ladies in town. read more

This place sux... The dancers are ignorant, and management is terrible. Exceptionally poor customer service combined with overpriced everything make this the last club to go to in DC. Watch out for the stupid doorman who's shaking people down for a ridiculous cash cover charge that he pockets! If you do go there, just walk right by him. Better to just avoid the ugly biatches and go someplace classy. If you'd rather enjoy an evening with beautiful women and get what you pay for... spend your money and time at The Cloakroom 10 blocks away and miles better. read more

Amazing experience, the waitress there with curly hair is an awesome host. The girls are hot and very friendly and the manager is an amazing person. read more

These people are nothing more than common criminals Charging hundreds of dollars to your card 2 hours after you've left charging insane prices for drinks you buy the dancers (2 drinks $62 then later charged card $300+ for nothing when not present) Ask them to correct the charges and they lob insane sex trafficking accusations to scare you away from asking to have them not steal? Guilty conscious or something? I'm just asking questions. read more

So sad to see a an old stand by go to shit. It had a good reputation for many years that has been sold to cheap, mean, predatory assholes - and it shows. The staff are hassled and seem impatient. Don't waste your time or money. read more

Not closed at all open Tuesday thru Saturday 6 pm till 3 funny Yelp doesn't know that lol go figure read more

Archibald's - Archibald's - Strip Clubs Near Me - Washington, DC, District of Columbia

To anyone looking for a regular strip club in the DC area, go somewhere else. This place is tiny, and reminds me of a hallway in a gym or library or something. Seriously. The tables and chairs are cramped together and there's ONLY 1 STAGE. It's a little square in the middle. Like a 4x4 tile. Absolutely no feelings of privacy here. If I'm watching a dancer perform I don't want to be looking at a group of people that's 1 foot away. Just an fyi because there's no pictures of the inside of this place. read more

This place is a scam. Stay away!.. pricey drinks, agressive manager, shady business going on here.. don't leave your credit card out of sight. Don't go alone. If care about yourself and your money just don't go. You are warned. read more

I was dying. Somehow, I had managed to catch a horrendous strain of the flu that would have made a peasant form the 1300s cringe. Coughing, hacking, It was ugly and then the phone rang with the bestie on the other end. "Whacha, doin?" "Dying," sniffle, hack. "I need to go to CVS." "I'll be over in five. I can take you, but I just have to run a few errands first" And with that, I was out the door, roaring down the road to what I thought was immediate healing. However, she had other plans as she hit the highway at the speed of light, driving us toward D.C. "Hey, I said I need to go to CVS!!" "What! you think they don't have a CVS in D.C." Before, I could answer we were running her errands with me coughing all the way. After an hour in, I had all but given up hope of finding a CVS when she said that she had just one more stop and the CVS would then be mine. Oh, happy day! She pulled up in front of Archibald's, smiling, "I promise this next one will make you really happy and then we will go to CVS." "Did I mention that I was dying?" "Come on it will be fun." Look, I'm no prude, and I am just as much a supporter of the fine arts as the next guy. Yes, a fan of all forms of dance; ballet, modern, Jazz, and God forbid, even Disco, I have no problem with the more exotic styles of interpretive dance expression. However, this really wasn't the day for any of that..after all, I was dying, nor was in any shape to parry such attempts to elicit my sympathy in an effort to separate me from my hard-earned cash. For these, I have a set of stock answers that usually serves me very well: 1) I'm sorry to hear about your mother's upcoming operation, but fortunately we have Obama Care, so I'm sure things will work out fine. 2) That is awful that your car needs all those repairs. You know it might be cheaper to just upgrade to a new one and then it would be under warranty. 3) I'm sorry to hear that you're short on rent. You know, I have faith in you that you can earn that much in no time. Don't let anyone tell you any different. You're a star. However, I didn't have to use any of these in Archibald's, and for the most part the ladies were pretty understanding of my condition. No, real big hustle here, and they didn't hover around even after I had tipped them for their noble efforts on stage. My friend went to say hi to the manager who she recognized as a regular in her restaurant years ago, which gave me the chance to check out Archibald's atmosphere. I have to say that the whole place was pretty relaxed, a no pressure atmosphere which was a pit refreshing. Of course, the flu was well upon me, and perhaps the girls just took pity on me, but everything still seemed very chill. My friend made her way back to me, saying, "Well, what do you think?" "I have been in worse. This place isn't all that bad. I mean, I didn't sense any attitude from anyone." She smiled, "Yeah, I think you're right." "Hey, you know what would be even better?" she starred at me blankly "CVS! I'm still dying." And with that, we left the land of flesh and dance, making our way to world of Nyquil and orange juice. read more

Hey Arch, NICE IMPROVEMENTS! And I aint just talking about the girls....seriously, the new furniture upstairs and downstairs is real swanky VIP for real. Drinks were stiff, food was hot, dancers were sexy, music was good but too loud for my taste. I think the night i was there they had 15-20 girls working - i felt like a kid in a candy store. Expect the doorman to be a dick, and just ignore him. Hes not a bad guy, its just his accent makes him sound like he hates you. :) read more

Archibald's - the front of a restaurant at night - Strip Clubs Near Me - Washington, DC, District of Columbia

NOT A SAFE SPACE FOR WOMEN!! Literally went in with my friend and within the 30 minutes of us being there we were escorted out by management and were not given an exact reason as to why. We believe they were upset that this group of gentlemen were talking to us instead of the dancers which is not our fault??? We were never given a clear reason and when asked multiple times they just cursed us out and forced us to leave. Seems like the men that work there are incredibly rude to all women including the bartenders and would not be surprised if sketchy activity happens there. All in all just don't give them your time or money. read more

I have recently had a number of wonderful experiences at Archibalds. Every staff person I met is friendly and wants to make sure the customers have a great time. All the food I've tried has been really tasty, and the burger deal for lunch is a steal (a burger and two beers for $12). The drinks are always well prepared and the dancers are top notch. I highly recommend the day shift as it allows you more one-on-one time with the performers. Kendall is absolutely gorgeous, not to mention an excellent dancer and wonderful conversationalist. She'll make you feel extremely comfortable and is my absolute favorite person to visit there. read more

Friendly staff, great atmosphere! I'll definitely be back Nick was very attentive to his patrons which made it all that better to stay and watch the fight. read more

Most bombshells in DC in one place with three bars and three levels, each with a different vibe. The first floor has a cabaret feel with 2 stages for close up opportunity to tip the (nude) ladies. The second level is more of a night club experience with entertainers. And the third level is The VIP Experience with private suites all with their own individual set up. Wide variety of exotic entertainers "Archi's Angels" from all over the world to keep you company. They all seemed very friendly and personable not stuck up like some gentleman's clubs you go to. Christina was my favorite! Professional security and it shows. I had the spinach and beet salad and tandoori chicken which were both Amazing. From what I hear the second level is open for lunch as a regular restaurant. Will definitely be back next time I'm in town. read more

This place will rob you blindly. Don't go to private rooms it's a waste. They will take money from your cars unknowingly. I will never go back to such a place. It was terrible. read more

Get ready to be scammed. Several attempts to talk to management have gone silent. Associated phone number to charges goes to a document processing company down the street. Charges being disputed. read more

These awkward moments brought to you by Archibalds: Awkward Moment 1: (approaching stripper dancing on stage) Farzan: Wow, you're hot! Here's a dollar! Stripper: Thanks sugar. *smiles, really weird teeth and gums* Farzan: I want my dollar back! ----------------------------------------- Awkward Moment 2: (having a conversation with fellow yelper Mic at the bar) Farzan; So yea, there's an Archbald, PA. Crazy right? It's just as depressing as this bar but at least you can touch the strippers up there. Mic: Why are you telling me this? *stripper rudely interrupts* Stripper: Hey boys. Having a good time tonight? Farzan: I WAS. So anyways Mic, about Archbald PA... Mic: (under his breath) Farzan, tip her. *slips dollar in her G-String* Farzan: But I didn't even get a lap dance! Mic: Welcome to DC... Farzan: But I didn't even SEE her dance. I wasn't even watching any strippers! Stripper: Welcome to being a homosexual... ----------------------------------- Awkward Moment 3: (on the phone) Customer Service: Hi. Thank you for calling the Better Business Bureau. How may I help you? Farzan: Yes, Hi. My name is Farzan K. and I'm calling to file 2 complaints against Archibalds. Customer Service: Sure, what is the nature of your complaints? Farzan: Well this one stripper was all hot on the outside, so I tipped her, then she smiled and gave me reoccurring nightmares for a week. And this one other stripper demanded money from me when I wasn't even watching her or any other strippers for that matter. Customer Service: Sounds like a case of homosexuality to me. Farzan: Thanks for the help. Customer Service: Glad to be of service. Goodbye. *These conversations may or may not have happened in this exact format* read more

A drunk stripper came up to me, and said I looked bored. So she showed me her tits, poon, kissed my cheek, and told me I was sexy. All for the bargain basement price of a dollar. That's so cheap, it's practically true. If that's not 4 stars, then I don't know what the fuck is. (Warning: This is a strip club, you will be sodomized by the price of drinks. What were you expecting?) read more

This place is horrible! My friends and I visited last night thinking it would be a pretty cool hang out spot and also somewhere to get food on Memorial Day. 1. The bouncers are extremely and unnecessarily rude. They informed us that we had to purchase something before we could even see a menu WTF!! We shouldve ran them but decided to go inside anyway. 2. The waitress is rude and overbearing. She informed us they do not serve tap water and your only option is to purchase bottled water that is 8.00!!! Oh and the fountain drinks with NO refills are 7.00 a glass smh 3. The dancers are either ok and just plain horrid and don't do much dancing, they just kinda twirl to 3 or 4 really bad songs and then come to your table looking for crumbs...weird 4. The WORST part about the entire establishment is the food. There were 5 of us and we each ordered different things. The food took a really long time to come and when it did come it was either lukewarm or cold. That night...all five of us had excruciating stomach pains and the following morning had to go see our doctors. I am reporting this place to the health department and the better business bureau. Please do not eat the food here unless you don't mind sharp stomach pains that feel like contractions. read more

There's a rule when it comes to strip clubs, the prettier they are, the worse they dance. If you're looking for a good show, wait until the one heffer in the club strolls on stage and watch your dollar disappear between the rolls. The club is a little dark but the two stages on the main floor are well lit. The upstairs has one stage but it's small and akwardly placed. The music played is decided by the dancer. At times the music may cut off abruptly so if you're in mid screaming conversation with a friend (or a scantily clad friend) you may get caught. My friends have heard an old man scream "So, do you like it when they cum on your face?" when the music stopped. Fun Fun Fun!!! There's a wide variety of attendees to the club, from young professionals as myself to weirdos in trench coats. Let's be honest though, a strip club wouldn't be a strip club without that one guy in a trench coat. The drinks are very weak, but the bartenders are flaming hot... even hotter than the dancers themselves. They've been known to show a boob or two when requested. The dancers for the most part are American Bred but you will sometimes see a lot of the Eastern Euros. For the guys that want to know, no lap dances, no touching but full nudity. My favorite part... no cover charge. This G club is probably #2 in DC from what I hear... I haven't attended #1 which is Camelot. read more

This place use to be a great hang out. The food is great, their entertainment is enchanting and the drinks are wells served. This place was my favorite DC night hang-out since 2006; however that changed this May 2013. I found the bartender and security to be rude and overbearing. While I was standing next to the bar waiting for single bills from my server the bartender asked her "why is this guy standing here" as if I weren't to be asked myself, if it was any of his business to begin with, very rude. My debit card was charged double my bill, a matter which I am currently disputing. The dancers remain beautiful and talented at their craft, but certainly not as pleasant and real as they use to be. The environment has changed from a cool hang-out spot to a corporate hustle. I don't know if the pace is under new management but I can say that I certainly miss the old Archibald's. I will be looking for a new night DC hang out nest time out. My friends had warned me the place had changed since last year, I witnessed it first-hand this May. I supposed if you have never experienced the old atmosphere, this new atmosphere won't bother you. However, when I'm paying for goods and services I like to be treated respectfully and not be double billed. read more

No touching in DC?! Wretched!! I mean, the girls aren't even allowed to sit on your lap. This, naturally, means no lap dances. Strictly only stuffing dollar bills into g-strings all the while getting no motorboating pleasure!! What is this place?! Communist Russia? 2 beers, 2 jager bombs = 40 bucks. Yikes. The security will find you a seat and there, you'll be packed like sardines with a multitude of other men, all slobbering and drooling over the unobtainable goodies. My friend insisted on spending all the money he brought so he split the remaining 100 dollars in ones he brought (yes, he was excited and brought more than we told him to) and we were just throwing money on stage like fueling a fire. Apparently, the dancer took that as a sign that we had money. She gave me her phone number. We left as she was leaving her shift and she again told me to please call her. Never got around to that and I haven't been back...I don't think I ever will. read more

My favorite strip club in DC. But maybe that's just my nostalgia talking. As a lowly intern my coworkers and I just happened across this place, thinking it was the sports bar that is actually upstairs. We decided to stick around and ended up having a great time. I returned a year or so later for a friend's birthday and we had a lot of fun. The girls were really friendly and some of them were great dancers--- others, not so much. There is one girl there that I'm kind of in love with: she has the most badass tattoo of a gun in a holster on her hip. I'm just a little jealous. read more

As I was one of the non virgins when it came to going to strip clubs...hey! I've been to two other's in WV!... I have to say MEH....giving my 2 cents adding to Kendall's drawings... saw many small (o y o), another girl that looked like someones little sister...swear she did not look over 15, but there was only one........... ( o y o ) that was very cute. The place was near empty if it wasn't for our group....the dancers needed more space and did not look very happy...they needed a stage, not a 2 X 2 sq ft square!. Anyone can just lean againts a pole! no skill there! So next time...WVA...hehehehe Expensive watered down drinks! I read more

The food was better than I expected. They had a wide range of options from soups and salads to steaks to pizzas. I had the French dip and fries, which cost about $7.50 in total. It was pretty good. The drinks were about $8 each, so the food is a much better deal. The mixed drinks were not made that well, so you are probably better off sticking to beer. We went there on a weeknight, and it wasn't very crowded. Service was on the slow side but friendly. The place is downstairs and a little dark. I won't comment on the entertainment. :) read more

Bottom line don't even go for a drink if you don't expect to tip mediocre looking girls. I mean they look for tip even if you weren't at the stage. Smh read more

This place has come so far. I've been coming here on and off for four years now and it's soooo much better now. I heard there was a new owner and it was renovated so I had to check it out. It's amazing inside, so clean and brand new. The VIP area is great too, it's so different in the best way possible. I love all the featured bartenders and guests as well. Great job Archie's! A new fav spot in the city. P.S. Angel is beautiful and a great entertainer read more

After a heavy night of drinking, my buddy from Richmond and I took sight at some of the nakedness dc has to offer. The food is actually pretty good, if you are looking to blow money on a $9 frenchdip sub with chips. Classiest meal there was an order of chicken wings. You can't beat the entertainment though. I prefer to pay a bit extra every once in a while to eat good bar food and have nice eye candy. Instead of the usual bar entertainment. The music sucks. if you are to strip while blasting marylin manson's cover of sweet dreams through the speakers, thats' either genius or pure bad taste. I still go back there though. I don't really mind the music that much, its' always great to space out and look at tits. read more

This place is fairly decent. Average food. Mostly nice dancers. But the staff is horrible. Especially the so-called managers. They are clueless, rude, unhelpful and behave like crooks. I call out Sylvia in particular who is on such a power trip she is insufferable. STAY AWAY FROM her!!! read more

This place used to be a decent strip club but now it's just a money pit. The dancers have always been on the weak side. Some cute but don't expect a performance. The women just wiggle and move to their own beat. Many won't even make eye contact while wiggling (performing). What really made me give this strip club 1 star is the cover charge, liquor charge, and waitress that tried to hustle me last night for $3. It was 2am Saturday morning and the cover was $10. I reluctantly paid the $20 for me and my wife. We sat down and gave our order to the waitress, 1 captain Morgan/coke and 1 Jameson on the rocks. She later brings the drinks a says "$29, will you he paying cash?" I ask how much was my Jameson? The Jameson on the rocks was maybe a half ounce shot in a glass with a bunch of ice. My wife said her drink was basically coke. The waitress says she doesn't know the cost. I put my cash back in my wallet and gave her a credit card and asked her to bring back an itemized bill. She later drops off the receipt which says each drink was $12.50 which totaled $26 and some change after tax. I proceeded in signing the receipt with the word ZERO in for tip. Did the waitress really just try and hustle me for $3? Actually, I would've tipped her $3-$4 for the drinks which would've made her hustle around $7. The drink pour was bad enough but the waitress didn't have to hustle me for an extra tip. Anyhow, we quickly finished our drink and left. I will not be coming back anytime soon. First time shame on me. Archibalds will not get me again. read more

Clean and always lively :) Beautiful people and i just love the vibe, one of my favorite places in the city... Talking to Silvia always makes it worth the drive... Always a good time, Thanks Silvia... read more

If you are looking for a great time, upscale environment, and magnificent dancing skills, then I wouldn't go here. However, if you are looking to climb over bums sleeping on the curb, a former math teacher, a low ceiling and cheap perfume, then this place is definitely the jump off. I made an epic journey to this place, after a sound recommendation from a drunk college kid in Adams Morgan. I was expecting a grandiose ballroom, filled with champagne flutes, and Pac Man Jones throwing 5's.. I mean come on, D.C., the land where dreams are made. I stumbled down the 4 steps and into this sketch basement called Archibald's. I had the pleasure of ordering 2 drinks costing 30$, and getting hit on by a stripper that looked like my elementary school librarian. Good times. Next time, I'll just remain drunk at Jumbo Slice. read more

Lolllll. The vibe at Archibald's is dreary and depressing nowadays. I've been to some competitors throughout the city and can now definitely say I've seen better. read more

I love this place, Silvia is the best host and always tests us well! Jazmine is my favorite cocktailer and her smile always brings me cheer and happiness read more

So, I travel to DC often for business, and tend to stay at the Hyatt next to Archibald's. For the most part, Archibald's is a great place. It's a bit pricey but it is a pretty upscale gentleman's club. Whenever I come into Archibald's it's always a great time, I've gotten to know some the women who have been working there a while, and I've seen lots of other women come and go through the years. So I came into Archibald's this week to unwind after a long day of meetings and noticed that there is a new girl. I believe her name is Willow? She's a gorgeous woman, but more importantly than being physically beautiful, she has an amazing genuine personality! Honestly her blue eyes and fair skin is what got me, but after seeing her stage performance, I knew I had to get to know her, and after buying a private dance, it turns out that not only is she gorgeous but she is actually a genuine and awesome person. I feel like with most of the women in their line of business are pretty fake, and I mean we all know why, but unlike most of the women at the club, Willow was actually interesting to talk too and we had a very interesting conversation that she seem genuinely interested in, while she did her thing in the private rooms. If you're ever in Washington DC and you end up at Archibald's, I 100% recommend talking and getting to know Willow with a private dance. Please be sure to tip her well, she is a great and genuine woman and as long as you know how to hold an interesting conversation, she will make you feel appreciated. I hope Archibald's treats her right because that woman right because she is definitely a one of a kind woman in this business. I will definitely be back to visit Archibald's and I hope that when I do, that goddess is there so I can enjoy her presence once again. read more

Great place with a great atmosphere and staff. Their manager Silvia is amazing. Top notch service all around

I woke up this morning and somehow I landed online reading Yelp reviews on Archibalds. The first impression I have is...the average rating from the raters seems a bit unfairly low. I feel some of the raters may have never seen the rest of the world. So the stripclub connoisseur and Archibalds fan that I am...I had to put in my two cents (I think the saying should be twenty cents now with inflation). OK, I admit, this IS a DC stripclub which means: NO LAPPIES, NO CONTACT, HIGH PRICES. This in turn means the girls make less money on average which in turns attracts less talent. Hey DC---whats the big deal? Sure we are the most powerful city in the world...and having slutty girls giving blowjobs in dark skanky clubs would not be setting a good example...however, ITS GOING TO HAPPEN ANYWAYS!!! Well maybe not but you certainly can get that a few minutes away at the maryland and virginia clubs! Let's face it--the rest of the world does it...why should we be so righteous as to not allow girls and single moms to voluntarily suck, fuck, and jerk their way back onto their feet? Sorry, I got philosophical for a second. Archies is a great place because if you are in DC, there are only a few premium choices. I have rated a few of the DC alternatives--if you want more info. The girls are for the most part pretty to very pretty...you will always have a weak straggler that will get weeded out eventually. The drinks are crazy expensive ($10-15+) but on the flipside, no cover charge, so you should be good for at least two drinks. The bartenders and servers can be friendly or cold, depending on your luck. The beefcake middle eastern bouncer guy is a prick but the rest of the bouncers I've found to be cool. So, the fun factor at Archie's really depends on how big your wallet is and how much suave and swag you have. A lot of times, the fun I've had there pivoted on buying drinks for an alcoholic dancer or two and tipping them for being your companion. I have routinely on many occasions drank up $300+ bar tabs and that was mostly my own drinks. Now, the real fun came when I've used Archies as my dating service and have gone out with some of the dancers that worked there (not as in a paid escort..she really did just go out with me!!). When one of the dancers really likes you, that boosts the fun factor times 10. The food is above average diner food, with the chicken wings being my favorite. The place is clean and fairly attractive if you can overlook the short ceilings, narrow venue, and small dance stages. I actually like the small stages because I can get a good closeup look at the girl to make sure I don't bark up the wrong tree. In short, while Archies is not a excitingly thrilling place, I do feel they put out a good product. The only drawbacks are that there is limited physical contact and that it is expensive to hang out there. I realize not everyone has $500 to spend for a night at the strip club so thats why not everyone has fun there. read more

I actually like how this place isn't that crowded and the girls are prettier than I originally thought. Not Camelot style but it just reminds me of a place guys would go on Christmas eve, have scotch and just hang out until its time to go wrap gifts. I like it. The only thing I DON'T like is how much the drinks are! Ridiculous! read more

OK, So I get dragged to this "strip club". Its my first time going to one with female dancers (if you want to call them that). We go inside and are greeted by this huge guy who runs down the Rules : No Smoking No Touching No Cell phones! What?? No cell phones i asked, he replied yes, no cell phones because we don't want anyone taking pictures or videos of the girls. I laughed to myself and thought take a picture or video, yeah right they wish. But anyways we sit down at the bar and immediately the bar tender is asking us what were having. I didn't want a drink as of then but i was informed that drinks must be purchased every 30 mins. So now I'm pissed. we order 3 drinks and began observing our surroundings, about 5 minutes later a "dancer" comes over and says hi and her name, the two guys I'm with proceed to stick money in her garter belt. So now I'm confused, they gave her money just for saying hello and her name. that's bullshit!!! Now on to the "entertainment" the dancer on the stage was very skinny and awkward. she had the look of pure boredom on her face as she step out of her clothing, and as she began to "dance" a fellow co- worker came over to her tiny stage and started up a conversation!! So instead saving it for later, she stopped dancing and carried on as if she was on a smoke break. That's was the last straw. i asked the bartender for my tab and vacated quickly. I rather watch fish swim than to go that horrible place ever again!! read more