Mr. AA T, Are you Alton T? If not, please correct me. As you did invade Alyssa's privacy AND throw her under the bus, I think it's fair to wonder if you are in fact a resident at White Provision.
1a) The club is called Compound, not Commune. I like the idea of a club called Commune; it sounds like a happy place that I should open. You're not invited ... ever! Oh, and don't you try & open up the club b/c I'll sue you for infringing on my IP. Meanwhile, I sure as hell wouldn't go and address Compound directly. Instead, I'd complain about the nearby residential property b/c let's be honest ... it's their fault for existing. I certainly wouldn't ask to see if the problems with Compound had been addressed by other residents, b/c then you might actually find out that for the most part ... they have. Don't worry, there was no charge to you for that service. Amazing what happens when you actually do something instead of spout off irreverently on Yelp.
1b) If you are prone to light sleeping, generally operate with a stick up your ass, or find people scaaarrry (b/c you're probably a not so closeted racist) then might I suggest that you move to Montana. There are no black people there and on top of it - few big cities. If you want to live in the country, live in the country. Otherwise, don't buy intown & bemoan the fact that people are around.
1c) Residents have a private gate around back that's only open to the public during the day. I'm pretty sure you've been told about it. On the one or two Saturday nights a month when Compound is open, or during weekends when people who actually have friends decide to be social with them, you can hustle on 'round back and use your remote. Granted, the remote does cost $35; but, if you're able to afford WP, you should be able to scrounge up the cash. Alternatively, if you play the entitlement card, then you may be able to get if for free.
1d) White Provision isn't responsible for the CofA/APD's inability to manage their own responsibilities. Last time I checked, a building can't up and move itself. I think there was a proof of concept in the movie Big, but that was just a movie and those were just toys. Buildings don't actually have legs. If you are upset with traffic congestion, take it up with the responsible parties. PS - what fucking building did you think you were moving into? Did you buy over the internet and only look at the unit until after you closed? PPS ... what fucking city do you live in? In Atlanta, there is bad traffic ... this shouldn't be news to you.
1e) Some asshole with a subwoofer in his car is not a WP issue - it's a dumb ass issue. These people are everywhere (like your mirror), you may even find them in Montana. So scratch my previous recommendation and just move to Easter Island.
2) I'm totally impressed with your superhero hearing. However, on the oft chance that you aren't actually Superman or Wolverine or someone like that, might I suggest that you don't turn off all ambient sound in your condo, then sit immediately next to your door and put your ear up next to it all in an attempt to hear something you might be able to complain about.
3) I'm sorry you have the motor skills of a 2-year-old. That's sad, but perhaps there is hope for you! My door hooks work just fine and are loaded at any given time with everything from bags full of groceries to towels and heavy robes. Why don't you come over to my place and I'll give you a lesson on how to use a screw and a screwdriver. PS ... not buying a piece of shit door hook might actually help as well.
4) I'm terribly sorry to hear about your toilet monster. Perhaps it's just Mr. Toilet Man haunting you. That would certainly support my presumption that you are in fact a young child. But seriously, you aren't the only one with a toilet monster, Mikey had one too (http://youtu.be/F7o8KuJKizs). Meanwhile, as a HOMEOWNER and not a renter, you may want to familiarize yourself with the tenets of ownership versus renting. Instead of expecting everyone else to pick up your shit (pun intended), you may learn how to hire a fucking plumber. You could go to a trade school and acquire the skills yourself; that might require some level of competence on your part, not to mention effort. If I broke my own shit and then had to fix it, I'd yell at someone else for doing a shitty job. That makes sense.
5) We already know that you have a super sensitive ear, so is it any surprise that you are woken up by the sound of a hammer several stories below? Might I suggest you actually walk down to the people hammering and politely ask them if they can wait? Meanwhile, your skills of negotiation clearly leave something to be desired. Take a class on interpersonal effectiveness and then try and see if you can get any one of the very reasonable and extremely kind people from the property management office to assist you. It's amazing what happens when you say please and thank you.
6) Try not to be such a Troglodyte
#TROLLED #PWNED read more