If the dream of the 90s is alive in Portland, the dream of the 50s is alive in Wallowa Lake Lodge. This old fashioned hotel has a prime location on a gorgeous lake near (not walking distance) the alpine resort town of Joseph, OR, which is a bit reminiscent of places like Sisters, OR. Cute baby deer ran around the yard here and let us pet them occasionally, and there is a lot of hiking and water sports to be done in the area. If you enjoy quiet old fashioned vacations, this is the place to go, especially with very young children or elderly people. Unfortunately, the hotel seems to be resistant to the modernization that it desperately needs.
The decor is exceptionally old fashioned right down to the comforters/blankets that are made of that weird fuzzy tan colored suede-like material that you ordinarily see only in motels. The bathroom also offers all the glory of previous decades, with a bath that needs to be drained with a button on the opposing wall (said button cannot be reached from the bath tub). The toilet got clogged the very first time we used it, in spite of the fact that we only urinated in it and there was nothing that could clog it. We would've called down for a plumber, except there was no phone in the room. For that matter, there was no plumber either, just the lady from the front desk. We would've walked down to the lobby to get her, but fortunately all you need to do is to whisper anything in your room so the front desk (and everyone else too) will hear you. Good thing is, there are no TVs, so you absolutely do not need to worry that other guests' TVs will be playing loudly through the thin walls or through the window above the door that you can't reach to close unless you are over 6 feet tall. (Oh, 'pro tip': One of the guests was smoking weed in the parking lot, so if you're bored, see if you can score a smoke from someone outside)
The restaurant had very friendly service, and the food was decent, some things even fairly good, but none of it was great and the pricing was more fitting for food in the 'superb' category (or at least organic, local, etc which this was not with the exception of my choice of wine). None of it was better than the stuff we whip up quickly for dinner at home, so for being in there $30-50 price range, I can see why the dining hall was completely empty. Oddly enough, the lady at the front desk said we definitely needed to make reservations, and spent some time figuring out when and where she'd be able to seat us. (Our preferred time was problematic if we wanted a window table) They must've had a whole group of invisible diners though, because the entire dining room was empty when we came in at our (second choice) dinner time. One other elderly lady and her daughter came in while we were eating, but aside from that the entire room remained empty from 7-8.45.
Get some rest before you go to bed, as you may not get much sleep later. Even with the window open, the room heated up like a sauna at night (did someone have the heater on somewhere?!) and it was so humid that I was only moments away from getting up and sleeping in my car with the air conditioning running, when suddenly it seemed to cool off slightly, and I finally feel asleep. Bring your own pillows too, as you get only one, and it feels more like a folded cardboard box than a pillow.
I would have posted this review sooner, except there was no internet access in the room and I could only charge devices made after 1925 in the razor-socket, as the others did not allow for three pronged plugs. The internet situation (strong connection, router assigned IP, just no data through-put) could not be solved by several attempts to reset the router (other guests reported the same). There was a great alternative, namely a second router that was for the owners' own use. That would have solved the problem, except the owner refused to give us the password for that one, because it was for his own use, which is understandable, since being the owner and all, he's clearly more important than his guests.
In short: This is a fabulous hotel if you enjoy vacationing in the 1950's (at inflated 2011 prices). Well, actually I mean an alternate universe's 1950s, in which telephones and televisions had not been invented yet and air conditioning, hair dryers and the internet are futuristic dreams available only to the owners. If you want to know what this place is like, imagine that Dirty Dancing resort, only without dancing, Patrick Swayze, or fun. Fortunately, the walls are a pretty shade of green so you can stare at them quite a while without getting bored in the evenings. read more