Visually, this resort is stunning with gorgeous, spacious rooms and incredible views, but I…read moredefinitely won't be back. The terrible food, zero entertainment, and constant nickel-and-diming completely ruined the all-inclusive vibe.
Arrival & Location
Check-in was painless with no hidden fees, though we did get hit with a pushy "not a timeshare" pitch. The resort is nestled in the jungle about 40 mins from the airport--beautiful, but isolated, as it takes a 30-minute Uber to get to town. Tip: head to nearby Boca de Tomatlán to catch a $5 water shuttle to quieter, boat-only beaches.
The Room
Huge and gorgeous. I loved the jacuzzi, balcony hammock, and high-tech touches like iPad-controlled curtains and built-in speakers. Housekeeping was thorough, and they generously restocked the minibar with booze, though the snacks were a letdown (just repetitive nuts and Snickers).
Pools & Beach
The rooftop pools have killer views and great drinks, but the food menus are identical across all of them, and staff usually forgot to heat the pools on windy days. The lower beachside pool was unremarkable with noticeably worse service. The beach itself is rocky and gets packed with locals on weekends since it's public. Watch out for the ridiculous $150 beach lobster upsell! Also, the free kayak and paddleboard desk inexplicably closed early every day, sometimes by 1:00 PM.
Entertainment & Service
This is the only all-inclusive I've visited with ZERO included entertainment. The only event was a single musical performance that cost extra. Service overall was okay, but only if you tipped heavily and constantly. One day we basically had to self-serve at the pool. Having to sign a receipt for every single $0 drink is a massive, tedious buzzkill , and especially dangerous while drunk, since you never know if the POS app is set in USD or pesos.
The Food (The Worst Part)
Breakfast and lunch menus were practically identical across every venue (mostly generic tortillas with low-quality meat and beans). The fruit was terrible (tasteless melon and zero in-season mangoes), and non-inclusive items were priced 3 to 4 times higher than in major US cities.
Dao (Chinese): The best spot. Great decor, prompt service, good drinks, and solid food (just skip the chow fun). They even let us order to-go.
Hiroshi (Japanese): 2nd best. Great service and lychee martinis. The tuna was decent, but the cheaper fish (unagi, ebi) was poor, and a single piece of Otoro was an absurd $40. Without the all-inclusive, a very basic sushi meal here would easily be $600.
Elia (Peruvian): Pretty presentation, but awful cocktails, 1.5-hour waits for food, and mediocre-to-bad dishes (outside of the grilled meats).
Bocados (Steakhouse): Great views, but terrible drinks, hour-long waits, and the worst dry-aged ribeye of my life (burnt on the outside, raw/overcooked inside).
Blanca Blue: We tried the lunch buffet and it was the most disgusting, inedible buffet I've ever had at a resort.
Beach Grill: Decent burgers and wings, but lackluster tacos. The raw crudo actually gave us mild food poisoning.
Room Service: Prompt but very low quality, and they completely forgot our breakfast order one morning.
Ironically, we took a quick Uber to a nearby village for a $30 fresh charcoal-grilled fish, and it was the best meal of our entire trip. Bottom line: the resort looks amazing and the rooms are comfortable, but the awful food, lack of things to do, and greedy pricing make it impossible to justify a return visit.