I'm really really disappointed that I have to give this place a bad review. After all their great marketing and all the things I had heard about it, it couldn't have fallen shorter of the mark if it tried.
So I walked in and noticed three things:
They were looking for a manager
Half the room was taken up with unopened delivery boxes
It was a really well decorated pub
So I can see from this that no one was there to kick people's asses. Ok, fair. Explains the deliveries.
Oh no, wait. It was dead aside from my group and another group. And there were two people on the bar.
But the décor was nice, so that's OK.
So the menu. Wow. Pretty. Very graphic design. So modern. Exciting dish names, WHAT SHOULD I EXPECT?!
So we all got excited, should I get the pie and liquor I pondered, or this lovely Flank Plate? Decisions decisions.
Let's get the pigs ears! And the bread and bone marrow! I exclaimed, all excited.
Let's get some sides! How exciting, BBQ BABY GEM ARE YOU KIDDING?!
Had I been transported to a cool Shoreditch gadteo pub I pondered. So cool, such exciting food!
Then it arrived.
Oh.
Just. Oh.
Hmmmmmm...
Burnt to ashes pigs ears. Burnt bread. Where was my bone marrow? Oh waitress darling hou don't know? Isn't that because you don't know the menu? Ok scuttle off and grab us some to spread. Thanks so much.
Ah! Here comes my Flank Plate! Phew.
Oh. "Meats, cheese, pickles and bread"
Hmmmmmm.
HMMMMM. I see.
Yes, there is some lukewarm meat of some description. Oh and some smoked applewood out of a packet. Is that grey stuff cabbage? Are those gerkins out of a jar? DID I JUST PAY TWELVE QUID FOR THIS???
How's yours, dear friend? Let's have a mouthful. Oh. That pie is burnt. The filling tastes of... nothing. The mash is ever so grainy. And was that once parsley sauce?
Oh and other friend, how's that lonely burger on your too large plate? Sad and alone? I thought so.
Ok. Let's pay and get out.
So we did, and went to Yates for a £2.75 apple crumble.
AVOID, KIDS. read more