"Where's the Beef" has always come into my mind since I came across the Oedipus Brewery and "The Beef Chief."
I'm still recovering, but this is what I remember.
It was the July 4th celebration yesterday for us "Amerikanse jongens" so I decided that I should serve my country proud, wake up at noon, take an uber to a hot yoga class, "work" remotely while sipping a cappuccino and salute "The Beef Chief."
INSERT (traditional "American redneck" voice) the best darn american cheeseburger I ever had!!
"The Beef Chief," "BIG FAT BURGERS AND BEYOND" sits inside the Oedipus Brewery in Amsterdam Noord. The website, designed by Atari, has burger meteorites and vegetable shooting stars letting you know things are going to get weird. Most importantly, the address and a name.
"Simon."
Fat Kids Corner INVESTIGATES!
Where is "The Beef Chief?" Who!? is, "The Beef Chief?"
It's Thursday, I'm on my "oma fiets," in Amsterdam. The weather, "cloudy with a chance of meatballs," windy, but a sunny day and I'm at Centraal Station, 4:52pm jumping on the Ijplein pont to "The Beef Chief".. They sound the horn, as the ramp closes on the ferry taking me to Amsterdam Noord. Ik heb trek, I'm hungry and my stomach growls like an angry dog.
Less than 5 minutes later, now back on land, I cycle hard to the Oedipus Brewery. It opens at 5 o'clock and I want to be one of the first there!
Serving sophisticated, flavorful beers, you'll feel like you're inside your hippy cousins garage with it's colorful pyschodelic vibe, happy people and easy going environment. Great for some sun, birthdays, man-dates, business meetings whatever, it's just so damn koe man!
Another pun...
A menu hangs by the bar but no kitchen in sight.
Servers walking around with delicious looking food but from where?
I scrutinize the answer.
Ik bestel a "Mannenliefde" beer and from "The Beef Chief" menu,
" A Rebel Waltz" a 100% beef, 2x 100 gram hand formed burger with house smoked bacon, american cheese, onion marmalade, garlic mayo and a toasted bun.
Oooooo...
Verdomme! Within minutes the place is packed! I hurry to find a place and continue my inquiry.
Surveying the scene from my vantage point, I see the brewery, bathrooms, bar and outside area. But still! No kitchen. "Waar ben je?" I say to myself..
I switch to postition 2 and continue my stealth analysis.
Walking casually through the brewery, I duck left, and find myself in a back warehouse. It really smells like i'm on to something,
I hear voices coming from the next room.
Detective Fat Kids goes in for a closer look.
Dressed in his finest "In & Out" T-shirt creating burger masterpieces is the man and I'm almost certain, MI-6 secret agent himself, "Simon."
Last name... Well it's not Bond!
Before I can intercept, "Simon" turns around and says, "I've been waiting for you Mr. Fat Kid, welcome." as handful of bacon is used like a napkin with chloroform and placed over my nose. I slip into unconsciousness.
I wake up at the table with my burger in front of me. "Simon" sitting across.
I ask, "do you expect me to talk?" He replies with an evil laugh, "No Mr. Fat Kids, I expect you to eat" and walks away.
"Shaken but not stirred," A gigantic first bite almost takes my garlic mayo covered "Goldenfinger" as I realize I may have bitten off, more than I can chew.
"Real" 100% beef is the first thing I taste. "Charred" to perfection, fresh, juicy this "prize winning blend" is how a burger should be. Meaty Magnificene! The sauteed sweet onions enhance the smokiness of the super thick bacon while the garlic mayo adds a creamy zing to the buttery brioche bun.
Three bites in, I'm half way finished and the "Rebel Waltz" is dancing in my belly!
But the BEST part. "American" cheese..
Wiki says, "American cheese is a type of processed cheese. It can be orange, yellow, or white in color. It's mild and salty flavor, has a medium-firm consistency, and has a very low melting point. It originated in the 1910s, and is a common staple in many American dishes."
"Beef Chief," Ik hou van jou...
EVERYTHING on the menu, from the ultra crispy fries to the "Straight to Hell" burger topped with habanero tarragon relish to my second favorite, the "Corner Soul" a crispy fried buttermilk chicken thigh burger topped with american cheese, pickles, iceberg sla, a green sauce (still trying to figure out those ingredients) make a Fat Kids trifecta of taste!
Consistency is what makes "The Beef Chief" the best place for a burger in Amsterdam.
When the question is asked by a friend, a local or a tourist, "Where's the Beef?" Make sure you point them to the "Chief,"
"The Beef Chief" at the Oedipus Brewery. read more