Perhaps I had realistic expectations, having worked in the drug treatment world and having dealt…read morewith drug seeking behaviors, but I found Dr. V & staff refreshingly honest, pretty open and willing to continue, despite my own withholding of some information that might have been helpful, initially. The laws around distribution of controlled medication have been tightened, after nearly condemning many in our country to lifelong addiction. The rebound could have been worse, so I have some compassion for their business.
My "worst" experience was when I actually threw my script away one month (I am old, on a lot of pills and got interrupted during the putting them in the cabinet phase of unloading groceries). It sounds like a weak excuse, but it was real. I knew the docs were prevented, by law, from just reupping the script four weeks early, but I did not expect to endure withdrawal for over three weeks with no relief (especially from the leg-shocks or nerve zaps or whatever they are) that prevented ANY sleep for days on end. Looking back, I think I should have gone to a detox clinic. Instead, I found an old script and spread what little was left over three weeks (and after missing a full week of work). The response from the doctor on call was nothing less than just "rude" (and it was not Dr. V or Erin, my regular ARNP) however but truly, I've listened to drug seeking behavior, and I believe THAT was what informed her response. Also, I will guess that it was after many times burned because "guessing wrong" results in disaster & death leaving just no room for empathy. I understood why she was "firm," but not having any suggestions to alleviate the symptoms seemed to land a little on the "neener-neener, you should have known better" side of the coin.
So, after that experience of having NO recommendations or medications to managing severe symptoms of withdrawal, especially for someone who had been a patient for over four years, with just that one incident (which was over a year prior to writing this review) I have become METICULOUS about accounting for my scripts. Also, I have leached a bit from each month's prescription so that if I EVER find myself in that situation again, I can at least taper myself off the dependency gradually, and perhaps avoid the withdrawal. To me, this is far LESS dangerous, than seeking scripts from strangers, or using more of some OTHER drug (that may have side effects) in hopes of stopping the spasms, nausea, diarrhea and other symptoms. I will NEVER go through that withdrawal again, and see now why withdrawal alone can induce relapse.
After all that, why did I return to a medication that causes such physical dependency? Because the pain I have is so debilitating, it makes me unable to work (especially at my current job that requires almost 3 miles walking, daily, according to my Fitbit). I cannot afford that - few can! The medication has Z.E.R.O. euphoric effect - so I am NOT tempted to take more than prescribed or use it in any way other than as prescribed. Using this medication is the FIRST time in forty years where I did not struggle to take it as scheduled AND it actually eliminated the pain! To me, this is truly a miracle cure! But the true cost is physical dependency. I have to accept it, I don't LIKE it, but can (now) manage. And overall, I find the office more personable, caring and adhering to standards than some. All of which are things I would want them to do with any of MY clients, or my children. I just wished they had SOME protocol for managing withdrawal symptoms, when necessary.
