I write this review laying on the couch...in a daze...fighting off the lingering affects of a…read moreforeign intruder that tries to block my arteries...alas, I bring you this review as a conqueror. A conqueror of the unimaginable, a nightmare to many, a mutant hybrid that only the bravest will face & only the strongest will survive.
I went on a hunt for the mythical beast , the urban legend that countless witnesses say inhabits the kitchen of Bertoni in Balmain...the terrifying, the fearsome, the Lasagne Burger!
For the coming battle, I downed a delicious coffee that some will say is one of the finest in Sydney. I waited for my prey, patiently, anticipating the moment to strike at it with my trusty fork & knife.
Then all of a sudden, unannounced, it pounced on the table before me! Kitted out in its deep fried multi layered lasange armor, succlent beef patty & oozing, melty mozzarella. On top of all that , it was armed with a side of shoe string fries & blood red ketchup to distract me from my goal!
We battled long & hard in a grueling endurance match. As I struck out at the daunting beast I found a weak spot in its armor, out flowed molten cheese & sauce, I hurt it! Once I had a taste, my adrenalin was pumping, flowing through my veins & I had to have more.
I was relentless, hacking, cutting, chomping & devouring my way through everything that the hybrid lasagne burger monster could throw at me. Then in a last ditch effort, I took a powerful swipe with my fork, sauce & cheese flung out and dripped down my chin...I towered over the tray where the beast once stood.
I did it. I slayed the beast in its giant, filling, saucy, cheesy, meaty, gruesome entirety. I sat there exhausted but relieved. I came, I conquered & ready for the next beast that Bertoni unleashes on an unsuspecting world!