No matter how perfectly matched, there's always the risk the doula you choose will need to miss your birth and you'll be left to labor with a stranger. This is what initially appealed to my partner and me about the Sister Doulas' model: We would have not one but three experienced, compassionate, indefatigable guides to help us through one of the most challenging days of our lives.
From the introductory Zoom meeting with Allison, Andrea and Renata, we knew we were in capable hands and that we would be happy to have any of the three present for labor. We appreciated how both Andrea and Renata also had medical training, but all three Sisters are thoughtful, straightforward, evidence-based communicators, traits illustrated in how they structured their partnership -- with Allison handling logistics, Andrea responding on demand to medical and quasi-medical texts and phone calls and Renata teaching a series of three extremely informative, reassuring group classes on childbirth and the postpartum period. This might sound a bit hectic, but in effect it was seamless, and all three made an effort to forge a personal, in-person connection with us well before the due date.
When my partner's labor started, Andrea was in constant communication about her symptoms, suggesting stretches and checking in throughout the night.
When we were ready for in-person support, Allison appeared promptly at our home and settled into a chair, calm and still, leading my partner in breathing exercises and stretches and bringing an immediate atmosphere of relaxation and safety.
Allison coached us through the decision of when to head to Alta Bates and accompanied us once my partner was ready to go. At the hospital, she was an essential intermediary between the medical staff, explaining the repercussions of the choices we faced.
We arrived at the hospital Saturday evening, and knew well in advance that Allison had Sunday afternoon blocked off to attend her son's birthday party, but we never felt any pressure about the slow speed of my partner's labor. Allison stayed with us through the night and headed to the party straight from the hospital.
It was our luck that Andrea was working the night shift at Alta Bates Saturday and she was able to work as the nurse in our room. We had both Allison and Andrea helping us through some difficult middle-of-the-night medical decisions.
My partner ended up laboring for 38 hours (much longer than average, though there was no additional fee from the Sisters), and Renata arrived just as Allison left.
Renata swept into the delivery room in the middle of a contraction and in the 45-second span of pain, she had taken command of my partner's breathing, quizzed the nurses on her progress, coached me on two complicated pain-relieving handholds at chest and knee, and worked several other bits of pressure-point magic elsewhere on my partner's body. Then she began preparing a hot bath to ease the pain.
During the contractions, Renata was masterful in a simple way. "I can't do this," my partner would say. "You are doing it," Renata would reply, hitting upon some novel method of distraction -- a repositioning or a squeeze-hold or a stream of pacifying chatter. My partner ended up having an epidural-free birth, as she'd hoped she might -- something she never would have achieved without the help of the three Sisters.
When my partner started pushing, the nurses and midwives were looking to Renata for guidance, and Renata did everything but lead the baby out by his hand. After birth, Renata gave a brief, helpful breastfeeding lesson and then insisted on going to Whole Foods and bringing us back a fortifying tray of chicken and macaroni from the hot bar and a sandwich for later.
Both Allison and Renata followed up with us afterwards at our home and helped debrief the labor, drawing on their vast experiences.
We feel extremely fortunate to have passed the rubicon of birth with the aid of the Sister Doulas. That all three were physically present for our child's birth is perhaps atypical, but it's a testament to the benefits of their approach and their ease in working together.
We couldn't have asked for better guardians. We truly feel like we had three doulas for the price of one. read more