My mom died of vascular dementia in August of 2024. About a year before, her condition had become…read moredangerous for her in the senior community she lived in in California--she was no longer able to care for herself. We (my brother and I) decided she should move close to me here on the Oregon Coast. The one negative was that she was cared for by Anchor Hospice in California, and they have no facilities in Oregon.
I set about finding new hospice care for her here. Samaritan Hospice refused her, explaining she just wasn't close enough to death. They were surprisingly rude and difficult, and it was a bit jarring to be treated as we were.
I then contacted Peace Health.
Their hospice care is relatively new, and they're in the process of ramping up services and staffing. It is a struggle for medical businesses to find qualified help on the Oregon Coast, and hospice care is not immune from this challenge. But the folks who work at Peace Harbor Hospice are the absolute cream of the crop. I first spoke with Fiona, their intake person--she was a delight. Curious, respectful, and very knowledgeable. I was sobbing when I called because Mom had been rejected so rudely by Samaritan and I was panicking.
The director, Deb, contacted me; she was also charming and competent. They approved Mom for care on the first day, and the team swung into action. Mom's nurse, Jodie, was excellent. Quiet, calm, peaceable, competent, serene, gentle, accepting, and with a wicked sense of humor. She was accompanied on the first visit by the social worker, Shannon. Shannon is a kind, Southern charmer who knows her way around the back alleys of the dying process, and understands that every person presents a unique tableau, Both Jodie and Shannon had my mom in stitches (the good kind) on their initial intake, and fully won me over too. I came to see them both as devoted friends and allies.
I am a very hands-on kind of daughter. I was with my mom and protected her even when I wasn't. Jodie and Shannon made me see early on that I could count on them to have my back in all mom-related concerns. They showed us nothing but love.
Dementia sucks. Most illnesses do, but there is something so awful about watching your loved one lose themselves from the inside out. Every day it was something new that Mom forgot or could no longer do. Vanessa, the health aide, was so great about caring for Mom's hygiene. I was never made to feel that I was somehow failing because I couldn't stand to do that part. I was praised and supported for all that did.
Mom died after an awful fall. Sadly, the facility she was in did not heed the mandate to call hospice first. Mom's skin was so fragile that she had flayed the skin of her upper body when she fell, and was bleeding and highly agitated at four am when it occurred.
The assisted living folks called an ambulance. Mom was taken to Samaritan ER. She'd never been there, and they had none of her medical records, so they didn't know she had a terrible reaction to Ativan. They pumped her full of it, along with a generous helping of opiates, and she went completely out of her mind.
It was a catastrophe. I arrived several hours after Mom at the emergency room. She was speaking in unintelligible sentences, trying to rip the lines out of her arms and leave.
When I learned what had happened hospice was my first call. Within minutes, they had meds ready and got them to the facility where Mom lived, so she could have them upon her arrival. We were able to administer a small dose of morphine, and my poor mom finally passed out in exhaustion.
When I got there the next day, I knew by her appearance that she was in the process of dying. I called hospice and Jodie was there within hours. She and I sat by Mom's bed for FOUR HOURS. She cared for Mom's injuries, and held her hand when she was though. My mom never regained consciousness and died two days later. Jodie and Shannon let me know they were there for anything I needed. Brigitte, a volunteer from hospice spent almost an entire day with me as Mom lay unconscious and dying
They called after Mom died. Shannon and I had a wonderful conversation about Mom's life and death and I felt cleansed after talking to her. She is a beautiful soul, who is totally unafraid to share her love.
I cannot say enough wonderful things about this organization. Choose them over Samaritan every time. You will not regret it. Dying can be really hard and challenging, both emotionally and logistically, and Peace Harbor Hospice are guardian angels who will guide you to the end.
