Oh me oh my. You know I do try. I really do. After two years of stuffing my face I finally took the plunge and joined Slimming World this February. 5 months and 2 and a half stone later I'm really starting to see the difference.....and then this conversation takes place:
Man: I'm going to take you to Patisserie Viennoise in Otley.
Moi: Sounds lovely. Pass the fat free chicken salad would you?
Man: I used to work there, I made the chocolate boxes out of chocolate.
Moi: Fantastico. Is that my Diet Coke?
Man: They're boxes of chocolates, made from chocolate and filled with truffles.
Moi: *CLANG* *CLANGCLANGCLANGCLANGCLANGCLANGCLANG*
Luckily for the boyfriend he survived being clubbed over the head repeatedly with a frying pan and off to Otley we went. And there I was introduced to Mr Bun the Baker, sorry, I mean Trevor of Patisserie Viennoise. Creator of MANY WONDERFUL GOOEY CHOCOLATEY CAKEY TYPE THINGS. Things SO gooey and chocolatey and beautiful that you can hardly bring yourself to smash them into your mouth. For about 4 picoseconds.
I never thought it would be possible to drop £35 in a patisserie but what the hell do I know? All I can say (seriously because my mouth is still stuck together with cocoa and butterfat) is that when a man buys you £35 worth of cake, florentines and chocolate truffles in a chocolate box made from chocolate it's frankly rude to pass on even the merest molecule of it.
Slimming World. I am so so so so sorry. read more