OH. MY. GOD.... Where do I even begin???
For those of you who follow my reviews, you know that I rarely give 1-star reviews. I try to give people and businesses the benefit of the doubt. But when encountering service so egregious, I feel it is my responsibility to warn other Yelpers.
I will start by saying that had I read the Yelp reviews for this place, I never would have booked an appointment. But Google has them at 4 stars which is MIND BOOGLING to say the least.
Yelpers - PLEASE STAY AWAY FROM THIS PLACE! We booked a couple's massage special that they had going for the holiday season. The following is what we encountered.
1. The place is gross. Dirty and gross. I took pictures. You can see them, and they speak for themselves.
2. The lighting in the room cannot be controlled. They do not have a dimmer. It is a bright light. You would think they would want to keep the lighting low, so you don't realize they only clean once a year. But no, they don't mind if you're blinded AND disgusted all at the same time.
3. The music was loud. I asked them to turn it down. They did, and then you can hear the music from either the other room or the hallway. So, we had 2 spa stations going at the same time.
4. People talking in the hallway. LOUD PEOPLE talking. So now we are listening to 2 spa stations, in bright lighting, in a dirty room, with people talking outside.
5. I don't think they could legally call what they performed a "massage." It was an oily rubdown. At some point, I wondered if she had a hand injury because my 8lb Toy Poodle applies more pressure to my leg when he taps me for an extra treat!
6. I had specifically asked upon booking that I wanted to swap out the facial for a paraffin hand treatment. They agreed. I have the messages to prove it. At the end of our so-called "massage," I asked about the paraffin hand treatment. They said it was not included. I told them I had the messages to prove it. They said it wasn't in their "notes" but would honor it.
7. Paraffin Hand Treatment: They took a painter's brush while I lay on my stomach, and they brushed paraffin on my hands. They wrapped my hands in PAPER TOWELS and told me they would be back in 5 minutes. They came back in 2 minutes, the wax hadn't even solidified yet, and they cleaned my hands with paper towels.
8. I asked if they had done it for my partner as well - mind you, this is a COUPLE'S MASSAGE, and I had asked them to SWAP OUT THE FACIAL FOR THE HAND TREATMENT! This would mean for the BOTH OF US! It is a PACKAGE that we paid for. They said no, but that they would do it. So, my partner also got slathered in the wax for 2 minutes. Nothing but the best for my man!!!
9. When we got out of the carnival-like nightmare that was this experience, they tried to charge us for my partner's paraffin treatment. They said that he had gotten the facial so this was extra. When I asked my partner if he had a facial (and I am assuming that anyone reading this knows what a facial consists of) he said "Well, they touched my face!" Needless to say, we REFUSED to pay for it, and they did indeed take it off the bill.
10. Included in this little gem of a package were champagne and chocolates. Sounds wonderful right? Well, the "champagne" was flat sugar water. It was clear white, no bubbles, and tasted like fruit juice. I almost spit it out. And the chocolates you may be asking? Ready for this? YORK PEPPERMENT PATTIES and RESSES PEANUT BUTTER CUPS. I will say, had I been getting this spa experience when I was 8 years old, this would have been magical.
How this place can call itself a wellness center is beyond me! How they have not one, but TWO locations, is beyond me. How these women have masseuse licenses is also - you guessed it - BEYOND ME! This was one of those experiences where I thought to myself "Are we being recorded? Are we being punked right now? Is this all just a joke and someone is going to come out and laugh and apologize, have me sign a talent release form so it can air on Bravo, and then they would take me to the real massage??" It was THAT bad.
STAY AWAY! This place makes Massage Envy look like the Ritz Carlton.
I will end this review on the 1 thing that went well. The Hot Stones were hot. So, there's that... read more