You know those meals that are so perfect, so beyond reproach in regards to taste, texture and presentation that you savor every last morsel because it's an experience worth relishing? Have you ever had a meal so well-crafted, it was artful? Yeah, me too, but sadly, this wasn't one of those experiences. Nope, in fact, it was far from it.
Hands down, this now ranks as the worst restaurant meal I have ever had in my life and let me tell you, there has been some stiff competition to claim that less-than-prestigious title, but it's a title well-earned by this place. I had long thought that the worst restaurant meal I've ever had was at some random Italian restaurant I won't mention here, but that place has relinquished its title of "worst restaurant ever" in my book to the Linden Hotel. The reasons why this now tops the list are too numerous to ever compile adequately in one 5,000 character review, but I'm going to give it a shot. Here goes.
My husband and I were in Linden and wound up stopping in here for a meal because we were starving and there didn't seem to be much in the way of competition in the immediate area. That was our first mistake. We should have kept on driving. We walked in and no one greeted us. The place was dead, only a guy sitting at the bar and one other table in the place. We grabbed a booth and eventually our server came over with the menus. She never said hello or anything, just plopped some menus down and exited.
After perusing the menus for a moment, we probably should have known better and just left because they looked so dated, like from the 80's, only reflecting current prices. Nothing really appeared appealing, but we were starving and thirsty. At that point, we would have eaten cardboard. In truth, cardboard would have tasted better. The server came back a minute later and we settled on spinach artichoke dip/chips/salsa to start, while I regrettably ordered the ravioli and my husband chose the chicken fajita. Every beer I was interested in, they didn't have. I finally asked for a Summer Shandy and the waitress told me they didn't have that, either. She paused, then said, "Is that Leinenkugel?" I said, "Yes." She obviously wasn't well-versed on beer selections.
I looked around and noticed dust on every surface. The window sill next to our booth was caked in dust. The ambiance seemed like dirty roadhouse tossed in with a bad DIY arts/crafts attempt at "shabby chic." Messy black paint on various surfaces in an attempt to class up the place, poorly painted picture frames on the walls and someone's odd take on "vintage" all on display. Up close, it looked like a 5 year-old decorated it.
My silverware looked dirty and there was a visible lipstick stain still on my beer glass that obviously didn't come clean after washing, if it was even washed at all. Everywhere I turned, we were swatting away flies. Our waitress seemed unfazed by this. Our food arrived, all at once, along with our drinks, in under three minutes of ordering. Yes, I said it- three minutes (more like two)! I can't get pre-made, processed food at a fast food restaurant that fast. That was a telling sign. This was going to be a very bad meal.
Okay, I'm going to be the harbinger of doom here, but this was, as I said earlier, the worst restaurant meal that either myself or my husband have ever had. I'm just being honest here. My ravioli was clearly frozen, but it was totally inedible. It takes longer than three minutes to boil frozen ravioli at home, so it clearly was just sitting back there already to go. Heck, frozen ravioli at Aldi tastes better than this and it's only $2.69 a bag. My husband said his fajita looked like cat food when he cut it open. It was disgusting. He took a quick bite and said it smelled slightly rancid (which I can vouch for) and it tasted like pet food. He couldn't eat it. We wouldn't feed this food to our pets.
Everything looked as unappetizing as it tasted. The spinach dip was horrible, stringy and room temperature. It tasted like plastic. The salsa was thin, watery and clearly from a jar and was bland as could be. The chips were dry and tasteless, tasted like they were made months ago and left out to sit. It was pretty obvious that was the case since everything was on the table in under three minutes of our server taking our orders.
We barely touched any of the food. Even still, we both wound up with a case of food poisoning! The most likely culprit was the spinach dip since it was the only thing we both consumed. All bets are off when you give me food poisoning. Sorry, that's just heinous and inexcusable. Not only was the food unappealing and overpriced, the very few bites we had literally made us ill.
Our server asked if we wanted the food boxed. We said, "no way." She knew we were unhappy, but said nothing, just dropped off the bill.
If anyone tells me they like this place, I immediately disregard their opinion. Just because there are few restaurants in town isn't an excuse for this. read more