Never again.
Some…read moreyears ago, my wife bought me a Stauer Graves '33 watch. Pretty, old-fashioned-looking, automatic timepiece with multiple dials. "Automatic" means it winds itself while it's worn. Keep this in mind; it comes back.
Honestly, this is a cheap piece of jewelry; I don't expect it to keep good time or last very long. I'm more-or-less correct. The dials misbehave: They don't keep day-of-week or month or date straight; time is only accurate to ± 2 or 3 minutes a day, but it works alright. After a while, the mechanism gets dirty, the watch stops running, so I toss it. But it was an OK watch, I know how it operates, so I order another. Lather rinse repeat.
February, 2026, it's time, and I order my fourth Stauer Graves '33. It arrives, and I notice the crown isn't working the way it did before. I look at the instructions (perhaps the design has changed), and they confirm: the watch is defective. I call Stauer Customer No-Service and... Clue #1: I sit on hold for nearly an hour.
CSR #1 makes fun of me: I only need to fill out the return form & send it back; Stauer will automagically send a replacement. CSR #1 doesn't say I'll need to buy the shipping envelope and stand in line at USPS, but I'm already committed, so...
Three weeks after the returned watch arrives at Stauer, I call Stauer Customer No-Service for another hour-long wait... Clue #2: CSR #2 says standard return/exchange processing time is a month. "A month?" He's going to do me a favor and request an "immediate" turnaround.
Clue #3: Another week goes by before the replacement ships.
Clue #4: The "replacement" arrives; "replacement" is in quotes because it looks & behaves exactly as the one I'd returned. I'm puzzled. There's no note; everything looks like it did when I sent it back. So... I go to the Stauer website, write a detailed message and hit "send." A message appears saying a reply will be forthcoming in several business days.
Clue #5: Another three weeks go by; I've not heard anything. I call Stauer Customer No-Service for the hour-long hold, and CSR #3 tells me that Stauer's service people sent back to me the defective watch I'd returned because they couldn't find anything wrong with it.
"They don't write to customers," CSR #3 says. I explain what's wrong with the crown: It's supposed to have three positions (closed, half-open and all-open), but it doesn't open all the way. The instructions say to open the crown all the way in order to set the watch. CSR #3 listens politely and tells me to return the watch again; this time, she says, I should include a detailed letter. Back to the post office, another padded shipping envelope, etc...
Clue #6: I find an email address for Stauer's Director of Customer No-Service, and I send these details to her asking that she help make sure the situation is properly addressed. I receive no reply.
Clue #7: A month goes by. My credit card emails to tell me Stauer has refunded 95% of my original charge. I've not heard from Stauer, so I line up for another hour-long hold, and CSR #4 tells me there was nothing wrong with the watch. Again. Understanding that CSR #4 isn't familiar with the Graves '33, I ask to speak with people in service. "They don't talk to customers." I ask to speak with CSR #4's boss; he tells me she'll call me back before close of business that day.
Clue #8: A Stauer Customer No-Service Supervisor calls me nearly a week later. From the jump, she's aggressive & rude. She doesn't listen to my questions and insists there's nothing wrong with the watch I was sent. This makes no sense because she then insists that the third crown position is to "wind the watch." It's an automatic. No winding. Remember?
She's acknowledging that the watch is -- by definition -- defective. Even if she's right (especially if she's right), she's admitting that Stauer has screwed up because if she's right (she's not), there'd be no way to wind the watch because the crown doesn't open to the third position. She's steadfast in her obstinance.
I tell her: She's the rudest Customer No-Service person I've ever talked with.
When all's said & done, the transaction cost me about 30% of the watch's price in shipping and fees, and I don't have the watch. Whether I can afford it or not isn't the point. I have the president/founder's email address, but I don't expect he'd respond in any more of a constructive way than any of his Customer No-Service people have.
It's a shame because I'd've been willing to replace the watch every few years or so and maybe even buy some of Stauer's other cheap watches or knives or whatever. Now, all I'm thinking about is how to get off of their junk mail list. They send catalogs & "offers" at least several times a week.
