First off, let me say that the 5 stars is not because this is a wonderful, clean, wholesome happy family experience in an idyllic setting.
No, it's 5 stars for people watching. The men with mullets and cut-off jean shorts. The women with huge teased blond hair and Harley shirts. The kids throwing up after riding the barf-o-wheel or some other fair ride. The guys who wish they were cowboy, coming in dressed to the nines with their bolo ties, hats, boots, and requisite cowboy shirt.
It's 5 stars for all the totally-not-wholesome fair food that is way overpriced, but worth going to the fair just for it. Giant turkey drumsticks; the Marines' corn on the cob with artificial butter slime, gyros, elephant ears, funnel cakes with fudge, foot-long corn dogs slathered in mustard and catsup, lemon shake-ups, and cotton candy, among other greasy / sugary favorites.
5 stars for riding all the overpriced rides till you throw up all your overpriced food on the kid next to you. Hooray for the ferris wheel and all those things that spin you till you can't walk in a straight line. And gotta love that ride where you sit on a bench that goes straight up and then drops you 4 stories! (actually I don't love that ride, and I'll never go on it)
5 stars for the special events: the Demolition Derby, the concerts, the light shows (not so much the rodeo because I don't like how they have to squeeze the poor bulls and horses in their important boy parts to get them to buck, but I dunno if they even still have a rodeo anyhow).
5 stars for the animals: the rabbits (don't pet the un-neutered male bunnies - they spray pee, and I won't tell you how i found that out), the sheep and goats, the cows, the horses, the birds, and my favorite, the pigs.
And 5 stars for the main tent area with all the vendors and events, and the free 3 minute massages from the chiropractors, the amusing karate demonstrations, and the guys showing how their vacuum sealer that doubles as a kitchen knife and fish-gutter operates.
So, if you're looking for a super-special way to impress family and friends, this probably isn't it, but it does give you a fun way to spend a couple of summer days in a home-town America setting. It's a good time spent doing a whole lotta nothing, but having a great time doing it.
(PS, I know this review is full of phrases masquerading as sentences, but with no verbs. It's all good. I do know how to make a sentence. I
just liked it better this way. :0)
(Extra P.S. - Fair people, please get rid of that pony mill. It's really awful. Those ponies looked bored to the point of neurosis...) read more