At approximately 8: 40 pm on Wednesday July 20, 2016, I was bedside with my father who was admitted to Bayside Medical Center on Saturday, July 16 with cardiac arrest transferred from Berkshire Medical Center. Earlier this day, my family was told by neurologists that my father has little chance of survival and that we should make a decision as far as his care. Hours earlier, my family had decided to set a date to take my father off life support. We decided it would be Thursday, July 21 at 10 am. Lindsey was the night nurse assigned to my father. My father jerked up about 6 inches from the bed then was making a gurgling sound that he had never done before. I immediately paged the nurse. No response. Another 15 minutes passes. Again, my father jerks up about 6 inches from the bed then makes a gurgling sound. I again tried to page the nurse. No response. I even raced outside to the nurse's station. There was no one there. At 9 pm, my father's blood pressure was then automatically was set to check his vitals every hour. His blood pressure spiked to 167/103 from 119/102, and his heart rate had gone as high as 134. Approximately 9:05 pm, Lindsey finally comes to the room. She asked what the problem was. I told her I tried to page her 3 times. She said with a bit of an edge that when you push the machine it only pages once. I told her that the point was I'd been trying to reach her for quite some time because of what I'd witnessed. She cut me off and talked about the involuntary jerking that occurs with his condition. I explained to her that what I saw was different from what usually happens with the jerking. She was dismissive again, asking me to look at the way his lips were moving and that it was probably neurological. Again, I tried to explain to her that what I witnessed was not what we were looking at in this moment. I again repeated what I witnessed. She said that because she didn't see it she couldn't say what it was. I again repeated what I had witnessed, and asked her if that was neurological. She asked me, with an attitude, would you like to speak to the doctor. I again repeated what I had witnessed and just asked her to answer my question. She raised her voice asking if there was a problem. I told her, again, that I am just trying to get an answer to my question. As I was speaking to her, she began to ignore me, speaking to the person behind me. I said to her, "Excuse me, I am speaking to you." She then began yelling at me, letting me that she was taking care of my father, and that is all I heard, because I was incredulous that under the circumstances that this woman who is paid to take care of my father was actually standing inches from my dying father yelling at me. She then demanded, again yelling, for me to step out of the room. I told her I was leaving to make a phone call, not because she asked me to leave. I then called my brother to come immediately to the hospital. I then paged Jody at Social Services to report her outrageous behavior. I returned to the room and the doctor then came into the room. I explained to him about Lindsey's behavior. He apologized, saying that should not have happened to me, then he calmly and clearly answer my questions. I told him that I would be reporting her behavior, that she should be fired for her outrageousness, and that I no longer wanted her to be taking care of my father. He obliged and we were assigned Lori, who is wonderful, loving, and answers questions.
Under the circumstances, it is absolutely outrageous in the last moment's of my father's life, I was treated in this way by this callous and unfeeling nurse named Lindsey.
I do want to add that I received a return call from Jody at Social Services and contacted the people who to follow up with. I filed a report against Lindsey with her immediate boss, the head of all nurses, and was quite pleased with the immediate response I was given. The head of nurses actually came to meet me to sit down with me and hear first hand what happened, as well as providing a compassionate ear to our experiences, and assuring me that the situation would be addressed.
Thankfully, after that horrific nurse, from that experience forward, the hospital made sure we were given the best of care with the most compassionate and caring nurses and staff. The next day, we were paired with a wonderful nurse named Helen who was so loving and kind it really began to lighten the horrific way we'd been treated. She made sure she knew everyone in the family's name, gave us hugs of reassurance, and even gave us gifts at the end of her shift. Then we were moved from the ICU to the oncology unit. We had two excellent nurses named Laurie and Deb who treated us with compassion, care, and love. When my father passed away, Deb grabbed me and told us, "I really love you guys." And we knew she meant it. Her humanity in the most tragic moment of our lives was beautiful. read more