I had mixed experiences with The Relationship Resource (TRR).
Initially, things seemed positive. The staff were welcoming, and Jeff came across as someone who genuinely wanted to help couples grow and strengthen their marriages. However, over time my experience changed significantly.
One concern I had was what I perceived to be an ongoing emphasis on financial giving. I became uncomfortable when my then-wife was encouraged to make substantial donations to the organization while we were also receiving marriage counseling from Jeff. From my perspective, this created a conflict of interest. I felt that it became difficult to separate the counseling relationship from the financial relationship.
During counseling, I often felt my concerns about finances were dismissed. When disagreements arose between my wife and me, I frequently felt that my perspective was minimized while hers was validated. Whether intentional or not, that was my experience.
We also participated in the marriage intensive. Unfortunately, I believe we left the intensive emotionally vulnerable without enough follow-up support. Rather than helping our marriage heal, I felt it intensified existing problems and ultimately caused more harm than good.
Later, I was removed from the mens group by Jose via text while my wife remained involved. That decision was devastating to me. It left me feeling excluded, unheard, and invalidated, while reinforcing the idea that I alone was the problem. In my opinion, if a ministry chooses not to work with one spouse, it should carefully consider how that decision affects both people and communicate directly and respectfully with everyone involved. Receiving that decision by text message felt impersonal and hurtful.
Despite these experiences, I did receive valuable help from the counseling center itself, and I remain grateful for the individuals there who invested in me.
Looking back, I also recognize that my marriage had significant issues beyond counseling alone. As Sharon Hargrave (our couples therapist) observed, there was a substantial imbalance of power in the relationship due to my ex-wifes large influx of inheritated money. Dave from Mission Church later shared an observation that resonated deeply with me--that we were living outside of God's design for a marriage as this was our 2nd marriage, and it was going to be a long hard road of which my ex-wife rejected (obviously she was wrong). That was one of the most honest and helpful perspectives I received during that difficult season.
My purpose in writing this review is not to blame TRR for the failure of my marriage. Marriages are complex, and responsibility for failure is shared by both spouses. However, I do believe there were decisions made by TRR that contributed to deeper division instead of reconciliation. I believe that half truths were believed and emotional prideful decisions were made instead of having face to face discussions. I hope the organization will reflect on situations where financial relationships, counseling, and ministry overlap, and consider whether stronger safeguards against conflicts of interest and clearer communication with both spouses could better serve couples in the future. Tossing one of the people out and ignoring them for almost a year until the divorce is not acceptable and a bad reflection on the way Christianity should be handeled by leaders. These people aren't bad they are just ignorant on how to handle situations and were more focused on money than helping people, and therefore shouldn't be making these kind of decisions especially if they only have 1 side of the story. read more
