So it turns out we had to go on a compulsory trip to the guildhall for some 'Music Industry Day'…read more Due to the fact my college, who we won't name for anonymity purposes, made us go and expected us to pay for our own way to get there, let's start this review on 1 star.
Anyway let's start the day off in the quiet town of Bidbury, I woke up feeling rough as fuck from the night before, I thought ho humb, I'm a trooper, so I got on with it. I had my breakfast, got changed and set off towards Bedhampton train station, then there was a shit storm.
Let's roll back 4 months, I've just paid £35 for a 16-25 railcard. Flash forward. I go to buy my train ticket, it should be £2.90, it came up £12. I thought you're having a laugh. So let me say this to national rail, you make me sick. You are the scum and villainy of this country the mere Nazi's of our time. Much to my dislike I had to pay £4.50 for a train ticket. So its not a good start to the day.
After arriving at the Portsmouth and Southsea station we thought fuck it, let's have a cheeky maccy fucking D's. We went, we are, we conquered. Unfortunately one staff member was really rude, the cheeky cow. She shouted in a rather rude tone "I've called you already, your foods ready". I thought right that's it, won't be visiting here again.
Now off to the guildhall. My college tutor said be there for half 9, what time does he turn up?! 10 to fucking 10. But once again I thought ho humb, I'm a trooper and I carried on.
£5 pound later, I'm in. I'm currently sat down waiting for this to start. I'll comment on the chairs, let's just say if an American came, they'd be fucked. Let's also say they make easy jet look like first class Emirates. Now there is a photographer taking photos of me, I know I'm a Yelp reviewer but I don't want the attention.
Update. It's half past ten and it hasn't started. If I pay £5 I expect you to start on fucking time. 10:32 its started. It's now 11:04, the first speaker is still rambling on. She said "nothing is impossible" and I thought yeah and I'm the king of China. Try bring back Freddy Mercury love. What's that? Oh yeah its impossible.*Update* Fuck me, you can tell she had a history in politics #avodingthequestion.
So we had a short break, me being the forget full child that I am, forgot to go to the toilet. I politely asked a member of staff where I could find the toilet, she rudely replied, ask reception. Sorry love, did I not mention I was a Yelp reviewer?
Next up was a panel talk from a collection of venue owners, promoters and managers. Local promoter and night club owner Luke Betts, had a lot to say about recent bookings and Mutiny Festival, but I got one question for you, you booking me for Mutiny 2016?
This other bloke who works for Island Records is just name dropping artists like he's their best mate. He now works for Live Nation and probably sells tickets to Viagogo for them to sell at extortion prices. Shame on you.
There's also a drug dealer on the panel, turns out its for a pharmaceutical company though, what is this? Dave? #HomeOfWittyBanter. He also is name dropping artists yeah I've worked with x,y and z. Sorry hard. If you heard him you would think he's being paid to hype up Dan Smith, either that or he loves him.
The Queen keyboard player promoting his own show, said he would get us on guestlist #Winning. Despite the majority of them having that standard monotone voice, this could pass off as quite witty and interesting.
*Update* its 12:05 and my belly is making weirid noises, think i need to have lunch. But where to go? Think we ruled out the option of McDonald's due to the rude staff, how about whetherspoons (see last review)?
*Update* 12:11 still rumbling.
*Update* 12:13 the fire alarm has gone off, even though the lady said there was no planned fire alarms today. This day is a shambles.
*Update* 12:22 everyone is back in the auditorium, ready to continue.
So the whole event has been pushed back 15 minutes. Not happy. So lunch is now at 1 and we only get half an hour. Didn't realise child cruelty still existed. They keep mentioning about the 8 45 minute sets, its not quite a 6hour LA-TO DJ set though is it?
Unfortunately my review was too long for Yelp so please find the rest of it here.
http://bit.ly/1IoVch4