My suggestion is to find a sober living/transitional home that has a later curfew than 5pm, and is ran by and coordinated by people in recovery themselves. People who understand that someone like me requires 7 meetings a week without feeling like that's too much to ask FROM A TRANSITIONAL LIVING HOME. At the very least, the Beacon should consider adjusting their "about me" bio to something that doesn't include substance abuse recovery - because that is false advertising. HORRIBLE - this is not a recovery home, in any sense of the word. I'll explain:
To my understanding, this house is for women struggling in any areas of life, and to offer a new way of life and a chance to get back on their feet. These are women from prison, struggling with addiction, coming from rehab, or from their deepest bottoms of their lives. Here is my experience:
I reached my darkest hour on 2/1/2022. I reached out to the Beacon for help in desperation. Treatment was not an option due to insurance, and when I came across the Beacon, I was so happy. Just what I needed; a safe place to live, get back on track with my life, detox safely and start fresh. I was accepted, and checked in on my clean date, 2/2/22.
The first 2 months were amazing - aside from the expected adjustments to rules, I have been the happiest I've been in my life yet. My recovery is now the most important part of my life, and I've immersed myself in Narcotics Anonymous, I've become gainfully employed, built genuine friendships with my roommates and the other women. I've begun to learn to live without substances, and most importantly feeling deserving of a meaningful life.
About 3 weeks ago (as of 4/15/2022) things began to shift: for example, when I moved in (and a main reason i moved in) we, with prior approval, were able to go to meetings after our curfew, as long as they were approved ahead of time. Now, remember, for MY journey, recovery is the number one priority in my life... I struggled a bit initially at requesting on time, finally got on track and was excited that I was able to get to meetings after my curfew (all meetings after i get off of work are either at 6:30 or 7, and last an hour. Phase 1 curfew is 5pm...this doesn't allow for recovery meetings after curfew, hence the rule in place to request meetings, in order for staff to know what we're up to - reasonable!).
Anywho, I attend 7-9 meetings a week - this is mandatory for me personally. Also, keep in mind i am the ONLY one in this house that has the desire to attend OUTSIDE meetings. THE ONLY one. this is not an exaggeration - this is a stone cold fact. Last week, at our mandatory house meeting, which I've always attended, they made an announcement that we can now only go to three meetings a week. Again, since i'm the only one that attends outside meetings, this new rule only affects me. My initial reaction is anger, but then i decide because i don't want to leave, I'll oblige, and put my request in for the upcoming week for ALL of my meetings, in the mindset that I'll be able to choose the 3 i'd like to go to for the week. One resident even stopped coming with me for the disapproving attitudes from staff when we'd return after curfew (AFTER THE APPROVAL). One of the rules is to attend 3 meetings a week - yet women don't follow this rule
Behind the scenes, the case manager had chosen them for me, without relaying that information to me. Fast forward to this week - I wait until Thursday, to even go to a meeting because the ones I enjoy the most and have the most fellowship support are Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays. This mandatory house meeting crawls along until about 6:45, and I decide to leave and go to my life dependant meeting. I knew there would be a consequence for this - but my personal recovery comes before the restrictive and non sensical rules instituted by this facility.
Now, the weekend of Easter, I have been placed on house arrest for a week: this means not being able to join my family for dinner this coming sunday. All for choosing to follow their requests, adapting, only wanting permission to chase my fucking recovery. I'm being made to feel like everything I do is out of line, too much of a request, that and I quote "do what I want" when the only thing i've ever fucking requested is to be able to attend Narcotics Anonymous meetings within the guidelines they continue to change, rearrange and restrict. I've completed every step and checkmark they require. I've done my chore, helped around the house, been open and welcoming to new residents, I've offered my opinions on ways to improve, i've bonded with women, and staff in ways i haven't in years due to my addiction. I even posted a meeting list of where I attend meetings during the week, so that other women could attend with me (They don't/haven't and that's ok...but that is why all the amended rules around meetings only affect me). The only thing i've stood up for myself for in 15 years is my recovery. read more