Welcome to the home of crackpots and cracked pots!…read more
The Glory Hole is a little known (and, for visitors outside of Scotland, unfortunately named) charity shop situated in the village of Blairmore. As the crow flies it's probably no more than a mile from Dunoon, but the journey around the loch takes a good fifteen minutes. Question is, is it worth it? The answer, it's a mixed bag.
The pricing is schizophrenic. I have found good quality, genuine antiques in the shop for as little as a pound, gold and silver bracelets, necklaces and rings for a couple of quid and once, to my lasting joy, a sterling silver inkwell for just £5. You can definitely find bargains. Sadly, you'll also find cracked and chipped vases at ridiculous prices (there was a poor quality vase with a crack down one side for £12 last time I was in), rusty cutlery, and a wide variety of hideous ornaments that have been sensibly smashed then unfathomably, and badly, glued back together.
In this cramped little space you'll find just about everything, from plates to paintings, from plant pots to canteens of cutlery. Sometimes the price will be so good you'll want to bite their hand off. Other times you'll stare incredulously at the price tag and wonder if you've wandered into Reggie Perrin's "Grot" shop.
Of course, it's the people who make a shop and as the Glory Hole is run to raise money for local Churches you'd expect a warm welcome. You will, however, be disappointed. There's a different volunteer in charge every day, so it's pot luck, but you'll find that many are the most unchristian Christians you'll ever have the displeasure of meeting. Rude, vile and unforgiving, a varied collection of wraiths and harpies who'll either make you feel like scum for daring to step through the door or mock you to other customers the second you leave.
I've been going to the shop for years, purely for the bargains, but this December was the final straw for me. As a devout atheist I don't believe in Heaven or Hell, but if I'm wrong I know where I'm going and I'd expect to find some of the "sweet old ladies" wielding pitchforks when I get there.
If you do go in, and you should if only for the comedy value, please follow these three simple rules:
1. Don't look them in the eye - they will steal your soul.
2. Don't express an opinion. In fact, don't talk. You're bound to say something objectionable and if you're not asked to leave you'll soon want to.
3. Examine everything. Assume anything you find is damaged and if you can't find a crack, chip or hole check under the price tag - they like to hide the damage where possible.
Enjoy! You won't, but it'll be an experience.