Nightmarish Hellscape! Named for the county and city in which it resides. Old rundown base surrounded by the "city" of Bremerton, a foul cesspit of humanity populated by only two verities of "people". Type one the mighty Bremelo, first discovered by Sir Mix-a-lot in the year 1988, the Bremelo is a parasitic beast of considerable size and girth that feed off the tri-care and BAH of its sailor-host. Though normally hostile and dangerous the Bremelo is capable of kindness and compassion as it prepares to feed off its sailor, this however is a ruse. The second and less deadly creature is the pill-headed civilian contractor, a scavenger by nature this timid and thin animal preys off of unlocked cars. Hoping to find unsuspecting gear adrift which will be taken to the nearest pawn shop and transformed into OxyContin.
The base itself is populated by alcoholic mouth breathers. These creatures spend their pointless lives hiding from something called chiefs (older mouth breathers who have completed a right of passage known as DUI), when cornered they will engage in a elaborate defensive dance where the move objects from one end of a space to another or type utter nonsense and give it to one and other. This dance when completed correctly will summon the mythical Blue Falcon to shield the individual, reflecting all consequences upon an unsuspecting victim.
As for the facilities they appear to have been constructed by dimwitted chimps around the turn of the last century. Many of the "buildings" smell of fish even when no fish are present. The living quarters, colloquially known as "rape dens" were designed by the Soviets who mistakenly believed they were constructing a GULAG, the rats were imported from exotic Tijuana as was the water.
Finally the parking lots are patrolled be roving bands of pregnant and/or broken sailors, who's only goal is to enforce made-up regulations and personal vendettas.
In short avoid! read more
